Transcript
Automatic transcript; may contain mistakes, especially in Hebrew.
You have here Meir Makhomel Sheets. Not necessary to look inside, but just in case you want to follow along, you have them with you. There's a Medrash and Barishas Raba. Medrash has his follows. Rav Akiva ha'yah yoshayv ve'doresh v'doresh v'zibor m'znamne. Rav Akiva was giving Sheer. He was teaching. And like many rabbis, when he started teaching, people started to fall asleep. They say all these jokes about the rabbis as soon as they start to teach people start to stop paying attention and my parents shul in Beit Shemesh so the rabbi speaks in Hebrew but most of the people there don't speak Hebrew so he gets up and he says, Mo'aivah Rabotai, which means to all the congregants and immediately half the place is asleep I was like, what do people think Moravah Rebotai means? That everybody goes to sleep? But apparently this has been a thing for thousands of years.
Rivekiva, the Great Rivekiva is giving Sheer and immediately people are sleeping. B'kei Shla O'Ran. B'kei Shla O'Ran. And he wanted to wake them up. He wanted to wake them up. So what happened? Ammar marah asa Esther shatim luch al shabbah v'esurah me'amedinah. Estra Amalke, in the story of Purim, ruled over 127 provinces. By what merit did she have that she was able to rule over 127 provinces? That's the question Rav Akiva asked, to wake his students up. Okay? And then he answered Elatavo Esther Shehayseh Basbita Sh'al Sarah You know why Esther Amalqah was able to rule over 127 provinces? Because she was the granddaughter of Sarah Imenu. She's the great-granddaughter of Sarah Imenu. And sarai yimenu lived shechayzam me'yav Hashem sheva she lived for 127 years So with tim locham me'yav Hashem v'sheva medinos So because Sarai Yimenu Lived for 127 years Generations and generations later Esther Hamalkah will be able to rule over 127 countries I have three questions on this Magish Three questions on this Magish
Read the full transcript
Question number one. What's one got to do with the other? 127 is a measure of years. Yeah, 127 years that Sarah Emeinu lived. What does 127 years have to do with the geography of 127 provinces? Yeah, you understand just because they happen to both be 127, If you are of the Kiva and you are trying to wake people up, why this devartura? Of all the devartura, the Kiva was a massive devartura. Rovikiva was an unbelievable master of Kabbalah. Why does Rovikiva feel the need to say of all the things he could have said, why does he feel the need to say this to Vartore to wake people up? That's my second question. And third question, I think you'll all agree with this one, is I understand if you fall asleep in a boring shear. But if you were a talmud of Rovikiva, what does that mean? That means you were an inspired talmud. You were somebody who really genuinely wanted to learn.
And Ravikivo might have been the greatest teacher in the history of Klal Yisrael. It's a toss up between him and Moshe Rabbeinu. Girls, I don't know if you know this. Do you know that Moshe Rabbeinu himself said the Torah should be given to Ravikiva and not to me? Ravikiva was an unbelievable person. So to say that Ravikivo was giving Sheer and the guys were falling asleep, this is not like a regular Yeshiva. This is the creme de la creme with the best Rebbe in the history of Klal Yisrael. Who could fall asleep in such a shiur? So we have three questions in front of us. Number one, 127 years, 127 provinces, doesn’t seem to be much of a connection. That’s question number one. Question number two, of all the dvretorah that Rivakiva could have possibly chosen, why is this the one he chooses to wake them up with?
And finally, who could have fallen asleep in the Sheer of Rivakiva? I’m confident that they would not need a madricha in the Sheer of Rivakiva To make sure everyone stayed quiet or to make sure everyone was paying attention I don’t know how I know this you’re just going to have to trust me On this one I absolutely believe it’s true Okay so those are the three questions that we have for today’s share I want to speak in a very real way for a second And I don’t know if you girls at your age are going to appreciate this We have some parents in the order even grandparents today Baruch hacham We should bezulch gonna move to Eretz Yisrael And to hear toto all the time I think we often don’t appreciate what it means to journey through life with someone. We see marriage, we see a very Disney expression of marriage.
You know what I mean? They tell you about dating, they tell you about the beginning of marriage, the honeymoon period. Very very rarely do they have a movie that’s about the end of marriage. I know of one movie that's about the end of marriage and whenever I watch this movie, and I shouldn't, I shouldn't watch this movie but I do, I cry like a little girl. I cry, I can't stop crying. I'm going to tell you which movie it is. Up. Up? The beginning of Up is the saddest thing In the entire world and I watch it on a plane an elal
The first five minutes of art Now, we’re introduced to her in Parsha arch Maleach The very end of Parsha's he says they took wives shame notably upon But he was already married well before L'tchlega That means that this woman who was his wife She was there from the beginning meaning in a certain sense obviously I don't mean it this literally but in a certain sense she was there before he got awesome You know I'm saying you know like when people say like I know it's I know she really loves me because she married me before I made my money you ever hear phrase like that like somebody gets uber wealthy And it's like she really loves me because she loved me when I was poor just because I'm wealthy now doesn't mean that She loves me for my money well before avram avinu was spoken to by god, Sarah emeinu was on the scene that’s a very precious relationship And think about the life that they live together let’s just imagine for a second on a very Human level because the Torah speaks to us as human beings we can’t possibly fathom
Who the people in the Torah were but it speaks to us like human beings so let’s Take a second and think about this they journeyed to Eretz Yisrael they went to Shabbi melech they went to parosh she was taking captive They couldn’t have kids they finally had a kid He had a she had a rival wife think about what she went through in her life And the end of her life let’s think about how it ends for a second Because it ends in a certain sense very tragically What’s the tragic end of her life the tragic end of her life is She hear’s that Yitzchak almost died at the aqedah and she dies Which means in a certain sense for being just very human about it for a second Here’s a woman who she gave everything, everything to her family and in the end there was a terrible sacrifice. The sacrifice wasn’t Yitzhak. Who was the sacrifice? The sacrifice was Sarah.
That at the end of this entire 127 years, how does she pass away? With the knowledge, I almost lost my son. And it’s too much for her to bear and she passes away. Just think about what it was like to be Avramovino in that moment. You know, it was like the Avramovino Avramovino who built his entire personality with Sarimene. What was the personality of Avramovino? Everybody knows. Tessa, well who did it? Who was the one, you know, because behind every great man there's a woman who's actually doing the work. Right, you girls know this, that's you. Yeah, your husband gets up and he talks a big game but you're sitting there behind him going You Are
That drew him in the light that drew all the people and the needed food that wanted shelter That wanted something in Rav ravino it was her and now she’s gone 127 years if you’re Avrava mavino in this moment imagine what you’re experiencing I want you to know I Saw a little bit of this with my grandmother I never I met my grandfather very very couple Years I think I was five when he passed away I don’t really have any memories of him my My grandmother never remarried. I used to ask my grandmother, I said, Grandma Sarah, why don’t you remarry? As a little kid, I was like, why don’t you want a husband? Don’t you want someone to spend your life with? So she used to tell me, because remember, my grandmother lived till 90. So she had a lot of years with nobody. She never got remarried. I said, Grandma, don’t you want to live with somebody?
She said, I tried to date after your grandfather passed away. I felt like I was cheating on him. Just because he wasn’t around doesn’t mean that I wasn’t married. It’s a very beautiful relationship that they had. I don’t really understand it because all the stories I hear about my grandfather weren’t that great. But like, I’m sure she loved him very much. Apparently she did. But it’s an amazing thing. Think about if you’re Avram Mevinu and now Sarai Yiminu died. Think about what the gap in your life, the hole in your life, Yitzchak V'atamah Sarah The Kiryas Abar Hich Havron V'erit's Kanan So Sarah died in a place called Kiryat Arba, which still exists today. Which is Havron, still exists today. In Eretz Kanan, the land that we're living in right now, listen carefully now. V'ayavo Avram lispod Sarah. Now Avram Avinu comes to give the eulogy. Yeah?
And to weep for her. Which comes first? What would you expect? Your wife passes away 127 years. She's been with you since from the very beginning, well before you heard the Word of God. This is the one that kept the hotel running. Everyone came for her, not for you. You're the great Baal Chassid. She's the one who's actually doing it. 127 years she passes away. What's your... If you found out, you come home from the Aqedah Baruch Hashem, I didn't have to kill my son. You walk into the tent and you find... Sorry, Amenu has passed away. What's your immediate I would have thought right away he should be crying. And yet the Torah tells us it doesn’t happen in that order. He doesn’t cry until when? He doesn’t cry until he starts giving to Hesper. He doesn’t cry very good. He doesn’t cry until he starts giving to Eulogy, which some say was Aschischayel. And that's why we say Aschischayel Friday night, the ultimate tribute to a Jewish wife. But I want to share with you what I think happened here. You know why?
The eulogy comes first. You ever have a moment in your life that was so deeply emotional that you couldn’t feel? That was too much for the feelings? Like you didn’t even know how to start feeling it because it was so big? I’ll share with you by my oldest daughter’s wedding I had this. There’s something very special about marrying off your oldest daughter. That’s the girl that made you into a father, right? You can’t replace that, right? That’s like you hold your daughter for the first time. I remember where I was my Monodes hospital. I held my daughter for the first time and I remember thinking in my heart I would die for you. There's nothing I wouldn't do for my daughter and then to marry her off and to let her go to a good man Baruch Hashem I Felt so beyond emotions and I kept having these emotions that were coming up for me for like two three weeks before the wedding I kept feeling myself like about to cry and I kept saying to myself don't do it Have the moment at the wedding Break down and cry like a little girl under the chuppah I wanted it to be at the moment You know, it's like there's something perfect in baseball Baseball is a beautiful sport Baseball is not a popular sport today Baseball is a beautiful sport Follow baseball?
I don't follow baseball at all anymore Baseball is a beautiful sport But there's something about it's the ninth inning Bases are loaded You're at the plate The count is 3-2 And you just hit the ball in the sweet spot of the bat And it's a home run. That's like, there's something poetic about it. There's something amazing. There's something amazing about crying under your child's kippah. There's something absolutely amazing about that. I got to the wedding. The moment came and the emotions couldn't come. It was too big and I was standing there. I wasn't numb. It was more than numb. I was almost frozen. The emotions were too big for me to actually have at that moment. So I missed it. The dancing was awesome. We got home that night. You could ask my wife. She tells the story. Is a Kamianski in the room right now? Ask your mom to ask my wife. Yeah? Ask your mom to ask my wife. Fact check me on this story.
I came home that night. All the girls are downstairs. You know, you take them off your makeup, doing the whole thing. The one that he went through everything with, he walks in, she is passed away, and the moment is so large and the emotions are so huge that he has no ability to cry. Not because he is not unbelievably sad, but because he has no ability to get it out. And he steps up to eulogize her, and as soon as he starts saying the words, it releases everything.
It’s like in that moment afterwards you’re like a stranger. You have no idea where you belong. There’s a feeling of being lost. And by the way, that’s what grief is. If you really want to know what grief is, grief is the feeling of a total lack of orientation in your life. I have no idea what I’m doing, where I’m going, I’ve lost everything. And that’s exactly what Avram Vinu says to them. Avram Vinu says, I’m kind of in your land, kind of not in your land. I live here, I don’t live here. I don’t have a place that I belong anymore. Why? Because that’s what Sarai Emeinu gives me. And then what comes next? After you finally buried Sarayi Meinu. Because by the way, that is what you have to do. And that's a gift. That's a gift that you get in your life, is to be able to give someone dignity at the end of their life.
And to be able to put them to rest. That's the ultimate gift. I did not have the opportunity to do that for my grandmother. My grandmother passed away during Covid. She lived in New Jersey. I lived in Eretz Yisrael. I wasn’t able to make it back for the funeral. My entire adult life, I’m the family rabbi, I grew up knowing that I'm going to get a phone call. It's time to come to America. And in my heart, I knew it was going to be unbelievably sad. But I had a certain pride that it would be me that would give the Yisrael a gift.
What he did for me in that moment just to be so tender in that moment and to walk me through it And then what comes next? He berries sarimenu and now he has to face and this is big because it’s really the crux of the sheer So now you can bear your wife after 127 years 127 Years you lived everything with her you finally were able to get the feelings out and you gave her that covid achron Now What’s Your Responsibility? You got to marry off your son. But why? Why do you have to marry off your son? So there's different ways of thinking about this. But one way, at least the way that I'm thinking about it tonight, and maybe we're all invited to think about it differently, but at least the way that I'm thinking about it tonight is... Sarah has to be, I don't want to say replaced, but her energy has to be renewed. It's not enough for Avramovino. And this is big. It's not enough for Avramovino.
Yitzchak Get Married You hear it now? If you're sensitive, do you hear it? If you're a sensitive person, do you hear what's going on? Go back to where I'm from. It's almost like go find another Sarah. Because that's where we were from. And then Eliezer evanavram says to him, he goes, okay, but like what happens if the girl won't come? And he's like, I'm not being a Come with me like I’m going to a foreign land to bring that magical girl back home what happens if she won’t come? Can I bring yitzchuk there? What does avram avinu respond? Under no circumstances can you bring my son back to that place? Now if you’re a psychologically sophisticated person what’s avram avinu saying? This faithful servant Eliezer he's saying go find Sarah but we're not going backwards on This journey l'chilcha already happened we've arrived now in Eretz Yisrael this is the land
Where we're building our family not back there you need to go back there to find another Sarah you got to catch her up on the journey and so Eliezer the faithful servant he goes And we know the story what happens and he goes and he davens to Hashem find me this She is this amazing girl for Yitzchak and she shows up and she is exactly like Sarah Emeinu. How do you know she is exactly like Sarah Emeinu? What does she do? She has chassidu. Because she has chassidu coursing through her veins. Because she sees the camels and she is like I got to make sure to feed the camels. And I am not leaving until all the camels are fed. And she is sensitive. She doesn't even tell Eliezer that she is going to feed the camels while he is drinking because then she is concerned. Well, if Eliezer thinks I'm taking too much upon myself, then he's not going to really want me to do this. Chaz said, she's sensitive.
She's every single thing that Eliezer is looking for. And then here's the unbelievable part. And she says, okay, I'm going back. I'm taking a journey. And do her parents want her to take this journey? They do not want her to take this journey. In fact, her father had to be killed by a malach because her father was going to stand in the way of the shoduch. And it was too important to shoduch. That's what Rashi says. And not only that, because sometimes if a great guy comes along, you got to be willing to let go and not all dads are willing to let go. You got to know he's a great guy. But if you know he's a great guy, dad's got to support, right? I know a guy who used to give his son-in-laws when they got engaged, he used to have a bullet made with an inscription of their name.
So she's like if she's marrying Avram he had Avram on the bullet and he would hand the bullet to his future son-in-law And he would say there's a bullet with your name on it. It's yours, but on the day I asked for it back run Yeah, I don't know how easy it is to marry his daughters, but Baruch Hashem not the way I think not my wife's family. Thank God. So now she comes back and And this is the unbelievable part. She comes back and what would you expect at this point? Rivka comes back. I would have thought the next line in the story is and they lived happily ever after, right? It's not what Chazal say. Look carefully. I think I brought it here. Yeah Yitzchot brings her home and the mejersch tells us, see if I could find the mejersch real quick, the mejersch tells us, Yeah 13 The second to last maramachom kol Yom Yom shohayso sarakayemes hayodlosos pisukos urvachah As long as Sarimena was alive, the hotel was running. When she died, the hotel stopped. What’s the last line of the magish? And now once Rivka comes, what happens? Everyone came back. Now
Now that's a wild thing. Think about this. 127 years, Saru Emeinu is the ultimate Malabastha. Everybody comes to visit her. When she dies, hotels open but nobody's interested. As soon as Rifka walks back in the tent, what happens? It's like Saru Emeinu is back in the tent. All of a sudden people start coming. You girls don't know this because you didn't grow up with good movies, but there's a movie called Field of Dreams. And in that movie called Field of Dreams there's a line, if you build it, they will come. Yeah? The hotel is built, but you have to have the right light in there that shines so brightly that attracts moths to the flame. Once Rifka came, that's called continuity. That's the story of Sarimenu. The story of Sarimenu is 127 years. She built something so majestic, so unbelievable. She had an unbelievable relationship with her husband through all the trials and tribulations that they suffered through.
So much so that Abram Vinu could not process what it meant to actually lose her. And then when he finally did, he said, The ultimate act of faith to my wife is to continue her legacy going. It's not enough to marry my son off. I need to marry him off to the next sari'imenu to keep this thing going. And that's what it means to be a Jew, to keep this thing going. There's a line from Golda Meir and I don't particularly like this line, but it does come in handy sometimes. What does it mean to be a Jew? Don't be weird in yawning in the middle of sheer Just Bad Timing You Know And by the way you did such a beautiful job of trying to stifle it I really appreciate it I'm a big fan of head bobbers You know what I'm talking about People are like falling asleep in sheer and they're doing this And Like I'm Saying But They Fight And the people whose heads are falling back Those Are Heroes They're literally willing to suffer whiplash To Be In The Sheer It's An Amazing Thing They weren't falling asleep like that You know what I think it means And I think it means that they were living in the era that was right after the base of Mikdosh was destroyed.
And they were tired. Because it's really, really hard to live with destruction. It's exceptionally hard. And how do you do that? How do you survive in exile? And by the way, it's not so obvious because girls, we're still in exile. Even though we're here in our Tzisrael and that's unbelievable. G'ula Has Not Yet Arrived. We’re Still in Exile. And we don’t exactly know how to survive. We don’t exactly know how to keep this thing going. They were tired. And Rav Akiva says, I know how to wake you up. Wake you up doesn’t mean wake you up from your slumber. Wake you up means I know how inspire you. I know how to inspire you. He said there was a woman whose name was Sari Meinu. She lived for 127 years. And her life was so profound and so whole and so continuous. That light never stopped shining.
And that's why Rivka was able to take it over, that generations later there would be a grandchild whose name was Esther Amalqah. And she would rule over the entire known world because of the 127 years that Esther, that Sarayimenu lived in this world. You know what that means? The entire time that she was living, Sarayimenu, all she thought about was the future. What's going to be with the future? What's going to be the future of my children? I think about this all the time. I'm a grandfather now. I have three grandchildren and I'm expecting Bez Hashem this year. My daughter is pregnant with a fourth. I want to tell you what it means to be a grandparent that's completely different. All of parenting is just to get to grandparenting. It's true, right? Because kids are fine. Kids are okay. Kids will make you a little bit miserable. Because you got to parent them.
Oh, you are right. Grandchildren are just amazing. They come to your house, they hang out, they chill out, they run around and then they leave. And they are just cute all the time. They can’t do anything wrong. You should know I want to come here. Baruch Hashem I love teaching you and sharpens. But I also tonight did not want to come here. Why? My grandkids were over. I had to leave them to come here. But I will tell you the truth. Right now, my oldest grandson who is like the apple of my eye, he is like at stage in life where Where he's just like , he's too cool for school so he's just like, running up and down the Block and he doesn't how the time to spend with his grandfather Am Pops. That's what they call me—am pops. He doesn't have time for me. He's Running Up and Down nachoza vitan, you know, like all the way down to the kamiybetter is over there.
You know, he's running up and down. He's Not Interested in hanging out with me. I said okay, If He's Not Interested in hanging out with me, I can leave. Shabbos afternoon when They come over, Akane-len Mi, Gadron. And I thought of this, the first time when my daughter had my grandson, I thought about What makes it so special to have a grandchild? I figured out the answer. You know what the answer is? Now I'm generational. I don't just have kids. I have progeny. And I think to myself all the time, I'm like, okay, my grandkids speak English, but it's not going to be as good as my children. Right? But in Mount Beit Shemesh, all the kids kind of speak English. But when they get married, their children are going to speak like Heblish. You know, it's like a little bit more broken. My great-grandchildren are not going to know how to talk to me. I'm going to have to be really fluent in Hebrew by the time the great-grandchildren And I'm thinking about my great grandchildren. And I'm thinking about like, what will my kids do to support my grandkids and what will my grandkids do to support their grandkids?
I care a tremendous amount about what's coming next. The greatness of Sarai Imenu is she lived a life that was capable of being replicated. And here's the thing. It's exponential, right? She lived 127 years and then Esther Amalkal ruled over the entire known world. And this was what Rav Akiva said to them. He said, of course it's dark, of course there's moments of pain. Exile is long. Exile is not an accident. We're meant to reveal Hashem in every corner of the world, and that means that Jews had to leave Eretz Yisrael, had to leave the Beyse'michdosh to find God everywhere in this world, because if you can't find God everywhere in this world, then you can't find God anywhere in this world. Tell me that we're saying, Rebbe, how are we gonna continue without a Beyse'michdosh? She said the same way we always have. The light of the people that came before us shines so brightly.
It’s our job to pick up that torch. That’s what Avram Avinu did. In his moments of grief, he buries his wife and then he sets out on the task of finding the next Sarimanu. I had a phone call tonight with a young woman who’s amazing. She’s an amazing person. Also, she’s in a tremendous amount of pain. Also, she happens to be dating a gentile. She’s dating a guy right now. And we’re on the phone and I sat there. I was like, you know, like I generally don’t tell people what to do. I don’t tell people, okay, people are doing avaras, people do avaras. We have to be compassionate. But there has to be a line that we draw, a line that says we shall not pass. And sometimes you have to say a hard thing. And I said, only from a place of love, I want to say the hardest thing in the world to you.
You got to break this off. You can’t do this. You got to break this off. This is a mistake. This is how the Jewish people ends. And the nature of the Jewish people is to continue the light. There's a home and the home is open, but it's dependent on Jewish women. You know, you come here this year, and I think you think this year is cute. And I want to tell you, it's not cute. You are not here for the Scharfman's experience. It's not why you're here. I'll tell you why you're here. You’re here because in a year from now, there’s going to be a Shana Beth class upstairs. And I want to tell you what it looks like a year from now if you put in the work. And I’m saying this publicly with Shana Beth girls in the room. I want to tell you that in a year from now, I see the girls who come here and they work on themselves. A year from now, they’re different human beings.
They’re more mature, more thoughtful, more serious, more engaged, more connected. It’s a pleasure to come and teach the Shana Beth girls. We are here because if you don’t take this time in your life to grow for real, to grow for real, like for real for real. We don’t know what comes next. The way that the Jewish people survive, even in the darkest times, is somebody has to pick up the torch of the people that came before them. The people that came before us, they shined exceptionally brightly and now it's our responsibility to pick up that torch. Girls have a beautiful Shabbos.
Is this shiur filed in the wrong place? Let us know.