Mishpatim - Jews that Sparkle

2:10 Everything in this world is made up of letters. Think about your body, which is made up of DNA. Everything in this world, every material thing in this world, is made up of letters. So when we say, for example, that an elephant is called a peal It literally means that it's made up of the letters pey, yud, and lamid. And just like you have a ones column, a tens column, and a hundreds column, a thousands column, so too when it comes to the makeup of something, when we say that it has a certain amount of pey, a certain amount of yud, a certain amount of lamid, etc. It means that those numbers are very specifically, those letters are very specifically placed in certain categories. And if you move those letters around, you could create something new. So we tend to think, for example, we tend to think of Of the Beis Hamikdash, the Mishkan, as like a miraculous place. But if you think a little bit more deeply about it, it wasn't so much that it was a miraculous place; it was a place that was designed not to conform to the laws of time and space.

3:18 Does that make sense? In other words, for example, why is it that right now, if I touch this sh tender, if I smack on the sh tender, my hand doesn't go through the sh tender? It's because the letters that are in this sh tender make it something is solid and another solid can't go through it. That's different than liquid, where your hand can go through liquid. But what if we reordered the letters of creation? What if I told you that I could move us outside of the realm of time and space? Then what appears to be the miraculous would become the ordinary. For example, when we say that the lechem apnen, the show bread in the mishkan, never went stale. So the simple way of thinking about it is that's miraculous. That's a miracle. That's a nase. But a deeper way of understanding it is not that it's a miracle. It's that when Btzalel created the mishkan, he made the letters in such a way that things don't go stale.

4:12 And so that's a really spiritual place. What would we have expected? We would have expected that you go from Har Sinai straight into the Mishkan, into this miraculous place where the letters of creation have been reordered, and now a person lives within a new reality. Not only that, what's the purpose of creation? The Medrash tells us that the purpose of creation is that God desires a dwelling place in the world down below. That's a big deal. It means that Hashem wants a home with us. What was the first time ever in the history of the world that Hashem had a home with us? That was the Mishkan, which eventually became the Beis Hamikdash, which eventually became the second Beis Hamikdash, and God willing, will be the third Beis Hamikdash. Here, amen. So we have in front of us a building that's not a building at all.

5:04 It's a miraculous type of building in that it was ordered completely outside of creation and fulfills the purpose of creation. Naturally, one would think that you would go straight from there, from Har Sinai straight into the building of the Mishkan. Does that make sense? And yet, in between, we have these laws. We would have expected the laws maybe to come down the line. Why do we have the laws right after Har Sinai, in between the building of the Mishkan and Har Sinai? That's the question for tonight. I want to share with you something exceptionally beautiful and it's really exquisite. It's not my var; it's a var from the Darche Noam, the current Slanim Reb. It's an incredible var, but you have to open your hearts. It's not just listening with your minds; it's listening with your hearts; it's listening with your souls. Listen to this idea.

5:51 There's a Gemara in Makos. The Gemara in Makos says, 'What's like.' A general principle that fulfills like all of the other things in the Torah. Everything has a general and a specific. There's lots of general principles that we say these are the specifics. So the Gemara in Makos tells us one of the answers to this question. Ba Micha the Hamid and Al Shalosh, Micha came and said, all things in the Torah come down to three things. What are the three things? It says the Chsivet says in the pasuk. He gidlecha Adam matov uma Hashem doresh mimcha. Tell man what is good and what does Hashem want from you. Three things: kiem asos mishpat You should follow the mishpatim. Number two, avas chesed, you should love to do kindness. And number three, vatsne aleches im Hashem alokecha, you should walk humbly with Hashem. Those are the three things. Which one of those things seems to be out of place?

6:52 It says three things. What are the three things that encompass all things? Asos mishpat, you should follow the laws. Number two, avas chesed, you should love to do loving kindness. And number three, hatsnei aleches Hashem alokach, you should walk with humility before Hashem. The obvious one is asos mishpat. That seems to be the details. If you told me the entire Torah is chesed, does that make sense? That makes sense. Every one of us probably in this room. If you had a rabbi get up and give a shir, that everything in the Torah is Chesed, every girl here would probably go like this. That makes sense. Everything in the Torah is Chesed. God created the world with Chesed. If Hashem created the world with Chesed, probably we're designed to do Chesed, right? That makes sense. If I told you that you should have humility and that you should walk in the path of God, and that's the main thing that every single girl should do I imagine every one of you would go, 'That makes sense.' But if I told you the general thing is to follow the laws.

7:54 Does that make sense to you? Those seem to be the particulars. I'll give you an example of what this is like. Let's take a relationship. I'm going to say these three things in the context of a relationship. All relationships come down to these three things. Number one Walk with humility in your relationship and be attached to your husband. Does that make sense? Humble yourself. Be in service of another. Isn't that a beautiful thing to say? And everything you do with your husband is really what. In a certain sense, it's an expression of your humility. Does that make sense? Let's say I told you Have a chesed in your marriage. Love to do chesed for your husband. Love to do chesed for your children. Does that make sense? Would you? Would everyone here go? That makes sense. That's a general category. What if I told you the general category of your entire marriage is make dinner, change the light bulbs.

8:52 Put the toilet seat down. Put your socks in the hamper. All the things that couples fight about. It's okay. It happens. It happens usually once, but we'll take twice also. Those things are very important. It's very important. I've learned this as a husband. Socks go in the hamper. Bracha. It's. It's. Socks don't go in the ham. I always thought, you're a guy, you know this, right? Where do socks go in the general vicinity of the laundry room? And your wife is sitting there pursing her lips very tightly, and I can appreciate where she's coming from because all women go, it's not that hard. Just put in the basket. I will do everything else. Just put in. We have a natural disposition to not wanting to do that. What's wrong with us? I don't know. Something is wrong with us as a species. But if I told you that the general category of your marriage is do the things like that are the particulars I think it's that ringtone. I don't think it's the phones. I think there's a ringtone problem.

10:12 The worst ringtone. So girls, those don't seem like the generals. Those seem like the particulars. If I told a husband, I want to teach you the main thing about being married to your wife. The main thing is Have a job. Bring home a paycheck. I don't think anybody here would subscribe to that. Of course, it's important to do those things. You're 100% right. But those are the particulars. Micha is telling you that's the general rule. Follow the law. Without the particular, you can't do. But that's not what Micha is saying. You're right. If Micha was here to tell me that these are the important particulars, I would agree with you. But he's saying all of the Torah. Comes down to these three things: humility. That's a general category. Chesed. That's a general category. Following the rules of the relationship. That's not a general category. That's what you do. That's the specific details. You understand? You're 100% right. Of course, we're not being mezozel in the details, but we need to understand how that could be the general category. So far, so good.

11:16 And this is where the idea from the Darkei Noam is beautiful, and probably one of the most important things you're going to learn this year. Moshe Rabenu in Devarim says as follows: Yarov kamatar likhi, my lessons will drip like rain. Tizal katalim rosi, my words will flow like dew. Kesirim ale deshe, like storm winds on vegetation. Uchrevivim ale esev and like raindrops on grass. Listen what the Medrash says on this pasuk. What does it mean raindrops on grass? Just as these delicate raindrops come down and they descend, they refine and they polish the grass. So too words of Torah are meant to refine and polish. One of my favorite things. We don't have it so much here in Eretz Yisrael. The we don't have so much grass here like we do in America. It's not the same type of thing. You remember waking up in the morning on a spring morning and coming outside and there's dew all over the grass and it sparkles.

12:28 And it's almost like Hashem, just like I don't know how to say it nicely, but it's almost like He airbrushed the grass to make it sparkle. There's something very special. Not walking on it, right? It's not comfortable necessarily to walk on. It's a little squishy. But you know, when you walk past in the morning dew, isn't there something beautiful about it? Girls, there's a secret to marriage. The secret to marriage is like this: there are people that will follow all the laws of the relationship. But the relationship will not sparkle. It's possible to do everything right. But to miss the sparkle of the relationship Which part? The secret to marriage. That's the part that people want me to repeat. That's the difference between a yeshiva and a seminary. In a yeshiva, I would say that, and the guy's like, "I'll figure it out later." In the seminary, the guy's secret to marriage. I gotta get this one. There's one guy in yeshiva. He's going to be a great husband. He has a notebook that, in sheer, anytime I say something about marriage, he has a special section of his notebook where he has like a whole list. I want to marry that guy. I'm gonna send him this recording, and I'm gonna say at 13 minutes and 38 seconds.

13:42 All the girls said they want to marry you. Now he's sparti, so it knocks off about half of them. Sadik, for you who are listening right now, it was about 12 girls in here who are now shy for you. Their secret. They should do that. That's their secret. Your secret is as follows. The secret to marriage is that somebody could follow all the laws of the relationship, but you could still be missing the sparkle. I'll tell you where I heard this first. Many years ago, I had the privilege of listening to Moshe Weinberger. Back when I was living in the Five Towns Moshe Weinberger's shliach is the rav of Eish Kodesh. He's a tremendous tzaddik, and he's very inspirational. He says a lot of very deep tiras. And I went to a shir from Rav Moshe Weinberger, and he told the following story. He said, it doesn't mean that there's any names. You don't need names. Every rav in the world has experienced this.

14:33 He said a husband and a wife come in to see him. And they're having marital difficulties. And the husband and the wife are sitting there, and neither one of them is talking. So Weinberger says, "who wants to go first?" So the husband says, "I'll go first." So he's sitting there, and he says, 'Rabbi.' I don't know what this girl wants from me. I do everything. I make a good parnasa. I come home at night. I go to Maariv and learn. I spend time with the kids. I'm a little league coach. I put down the toilet seat. I change the light bulbs. I take out the garbage. I do everything. And the entire time that he's talking, the wife is sitting there with her arms folded and she's just shaking her head. And I want you to know that for a husband, that's like an allergic reaction. Don't do that.

15:26 And the husband is in there, and he's starting to get more and more infuriated. He goes, "You see, Rebbe, even now it's not enough for her. It's never enough. What can I do? It's never enough." And Rav Weinberger turns to the wife And he says to the wife Seems like he's a really great guy. Not everybody makes a good parnasa. Not everybody comes home and davenes maariv. Or learns or spends time with the kids. Not everybody changes the light bulbs. Not everybody puts down the toilet seat. And this woman looks at Rav Weinberger and she says Rabbi, do you think I married him to change the light bulbs? Do you think I married him to put down the toilet seat or to take out the garbage? Do you think I married him because of the paycheck that he brings home? I married him because of the way that he used to look at me, the way that he looked at me under the chuppah. And when's the last time that he looked at me that way?

16:14 The nature of a healthy relationship is not that we do for each other. The nature of our relationships has to be that what we do for each other brings out the sparkle in the relationship. That when a wife sees a husband and he's running to take out the garbage, she sparkles. She says, "I know why my husband is taking out the garbage because he doesn't want me to have to do it later." An unexpected gift at an unexpected time goes a tremendously long way, and it doesn't need to be a big gift. I've learned the art of bringing home a salad. When your husband—for me, it's my wife. When my wife is having a hard day, and I know that she's not going to have time to eat. And if you just go to Gledeland and get the stinking little salad, and what does it cost already? It's twenty-five shekel for the salad. But if you know. She likes this and she doesn't like this. She likes this and she doesn't like this. And you come home and she's not expecting it.

17:14 And she sees my husband cares about me. It sparkles in the relationship. It's not just following the laws. It's the laws that make the relationship sparkle. You can do it for your husbands. It's not a small thing. People are extraordinarily busy, and nobody is more busy than a mom. And husbands don't necessarily understand that. They think their wife is home, so they think they're your home. I'm the one that's killing myself. If you're a mother, you're extraordinarily busy and you're exhausted, and you're killing yourself. But I want you to know, it's no small matter that your husband comes home and you made him dinner. It's no small matter at all. It can make the relationship sparkle. My wife, when she was in sem, had a rabbi who taught her, even if you don't have time to make dinner, at least fry some onions. Because when he walks in the door, he's like, dinner's coming. There's nothing like walking into a house with fried onions. It's not that your husband needs dinner.

18:11 Your husband is very capable of taking out some frozen hamburgers from the freezer and throwing them on the grill. It's not that big a deal. But there's a difference when you walk in and somebody said, I care about you and I'm here to greet you. The way that you walk into the door matters. They tell the story about Rishlomaz Almanarbach Rishlomaz Almanarbach, who lived right here in Yerushalayim. Before he would walk into the house, he would straighten himself out. And he would like you know fix his tie and straighten his hat. And they said, Rebbe, what are you doing? He said, I'm walking in to greet the Shechina. I'm walking in to greet the presence of Hashem. That's how it has to be when we're going when we're walking into our homes. I'll tell you a story, and this is a hysterical story. It's a ridiculous story, but also it's a beautiful story. My mother is one of the most growth-oriented people I ever met in my entire life.

19:00 And my mother, she should live and be well. She didn't grow up with a basic Yachov education. She went to public school and she was a Balas Tshuva and she fought every step of the way to become an Orthodox observant Jew. And she's an amazingly growth-oriented person. And there was a Sheer. Whenever there's a Sheer, my mother goes to the Sheer. Some people are insatiable; they just can't stop learning. My mother cannot stop learning. Any Sheer that's available, that she's open, she's going to the Sheer. She just wants to learn Torah. It's one of the most beautiful things about my mother. Growing up in a home with a mother like that is an incredible thing. And there was a she'er given in the neighborhood in Farakway Irakaydush many years ago by Rabbi Blumenkrantz. Olav Ashalom. Rabbi Blumenkrantz was a tremendous tzaddik who had eighteen children. Very special man, one of the big halachic decisors of the generation And Rabbi Blumenkrantz gave a she'er.

19:52 And my father must have done something wrong because my father doesn't like to go to shiurim at all. My father, when I was growing up, would say a little learning never hurts, so let's do as little as possible. And my mother slept him to the shiur. And the only way that my father went to the shiur is if he did something wrong. There's no way he did something right and went to the shiur. So obviously something happened. And Rabbi Blumenkrantz is giving a shiur to the women, and he's talking about the challenges that a man can have in the world today. He says to the women. Your husbands are out all day. When they come home at night, you should look nice for your husband. And my father's like Paying attention over here. This is a good shear. And Rabbi Blumenkrantz sat and learned all day long. He was a very chashev rav, and he said when your husband comes home.

20:38 You should have something made for him. You should have something baked for him. He said, when I come home from Kailo, my wife makes fresh krempuffs. My father loves cream puffs. That's his favorite thing in the world. And my father said, "This is the best sheer ever," and he said, "This is awesome." Now you have to make me cream puffs. And my mother is this devoted eishas chayal. She said, "I'm gonna do the right thing," and she's gonna make cream puffs. So she calls Rebbetzin Blumenkrantz. Rebbetzin Blumenkrantz is as American as apple pie. She is this amazing woman. 18 children. Can I know her? And she was a super mom. And my mother calls her. She goes, "Rabbits and Blumenkranz." I was at your husband's shir last night. It was so inspiring. I want the recipe for cream puffs. She goes, "What are you talking about? What cream puffs?" She said, "Your husband said that when he comes home from Kotel every day, you make him fresh cream puffs."

21:34 My Rabbits and Blumenkranz said to my mother, 'She goes, Paula, are you crazy? I have eighteen children. You think I have time to make him cream puffs? I go to the bakery. I buy cream puffs.' I put them in the freezer. Ten minutes before he comes home, I put them in the oven. He thinks he's getting fresh cream puffs. Rabbi Blumganzel Shlomo was giving this shmoosah. You have to make cream puffs for your husbands. But you know, it's a beautiful story. Even though it was hysterical and even though it was ridiculous, and my mother was like telling my father afterwards He doesn't make cream puffs for him. But there's something amazing about that. You know why? Because he came home from Kotel, and she said, 'I have 18 kids. I don't have time to make him fresh cream puffs.' But I know he likes Krempas, so I'm going to keep them around for him. There has to be dignity in our relationships. It can't just be that Reb Zimun Krantz. Did she need to do that? Reb Zimun, he comes home from Kairo. How was your day? I have 18 kids. How do you think my day was? You know. You know they say Avram Avinu instituted shachris, and minch and mincha was instituted by Yitzchak, and Ma'ariv was instituted by Yaakov Avinu. You know what the famous joke is? You know why Yaakov Avinu instituted Ma'ariv?

22:41 He had 13 kids. Wouldn't you want to go out at night to Daven Maariv? Who wants to be at home when you have 13 kids running around making you crazy? You ever see these families in Yerushalayim where they're trying to get on a bus? That's a. It's like these parents are heroes. But if you see the father, he gets on the bus with a couple little kids behind them. And the mother's getting on the bus, and she's trying to make sure that no kid gets run over in the process of getting on the bus. And each kid is carrying the other kid, and sometimes getting on a bus in Yerushalayim is watching a tribe or a clan get on a bus together. These poor fashmetered women, they just you see. You know why they're hunched over like that, these bubby's in Yerushalayim? It's because you tried doing that for your entire life, but you should know they sparkle. They mamish sparkle. Because they're not in it for things. They don't want big houses. They don't want fancy cars. They want just some time with a husband who looks at them in a loving way.

23:34 The rules are not the point. It's the things that the rules can bring out. If a person learns Torah, and this is the message of this week's parsha. If a person learns Torah but you're an animal Then you're not learning Torah. If Torah doesn't make you sparkle, then you're not learning Torah. There are people who are mamish. They're tremendous. They're tremendous people. They're learning a tremendous amount of Torah. They can quote everything to you. Shas poiskim. But they're animals. And then there are people who know not so much, but the Torah that they learn makes them sparkle. I'll tell you a ma'isa, a beautiful ma'isa with the Alter Rebbe. The Alter Rebbe was the first Rebbe of Lubavitch or Shneir Zalman of Liadi. An amazing ma'isa with the Alter Rebbe. The Alter Rebbe was sitting and learning on the second floor of his house. And his son at night was learning in the first floor. He was already married with kids of his own.

24:25 And his children. One of his kids started crying And the Alter Rebbe's son was so engrossed in his learning that he didn't hear his son crying. But the Alter Rebbe, who was on the second floor, heard the kid crying. He came downstairs and took the baby and rocked him back to sleep. And then he went over to his son. And he said to his son, "I know you were learning so intensely. That you didn't hear your son crying." But it can never be that your Torah takes you farther away from a Jew's tears. It can never be that you are learning Torah so deeply you can't appreciate the pain of another. It means your Torah doesn't sparkle. You know when Klal Yisrael started Gullus. You know when Gullus began, when Yosef HaTzaddik was in a pit. And where was Reuven? Says the Labavitcher Rebbe. Where was Reuven? He was doing tshuva for an avera that he had done over twenty years before.

25:22 You know what the Lubavitcher Rebbe said? Gullus begins when your frumkeit is more important than the Jew who's sitting in the pit. Because that means your taira doesn't sparkle. Your taira, if it's going to sparkle, means that it changes the way you treat each other. There's a secret to taira. Some people learn taira; they're academics. I'm sure there are girls here in this seminary that are very smart. That when a rabbi gets up and speaks, they take notes and they could repeat it back and they could take a test and they could get a hundred on the test. It's possible. It's sad, but it's possible that a person becomes a professor of Rashi. You could be a professor of Rashi. You could be a Ramban scholar. But that's not the point of Torah. Torah is not here to make you into a professor or into a scholar. Torah is here to change the way you lead your life. It changes the way you interact with your children, the way you interact with your husbands, the way you interact with your community. If it doesn't change you, if Torah is not a transformational process, then something is wrong. Everything in Torah is meant to touch the soul, and it's meant to make you sparkle.

26:29 It's a beautiful ma'aseh with the HaLeGerebbe of Moshe Leib Sassover. Have you ever heard of Moshe Leib Sassover? We should have a class going through every single one of the tzaddikim, so you know who everybody was. Rav Moshe Leib Sasover was one of the great Hasidic masters, and he had somebody in his life who was called a msnagid. A msnagid was somebody who was an opponent of Chassidus. And Rav Moshe Leib Sasover, this msnagid, he would never stop trying to find something wrong with Rav Moshe Leib Sasover And he came after him and he said, 'I'm going to come after his davening.' But Rav Moshe Leib Sasover davened like a malach; he couldn't find anything wrong with his davening. To watch Mosheleib Sasever daven was like watching a Malach Hashem tzvachos daven. So he couldn't come after his davening. But during slichos in Elul

27:12 He came and Rav Mosheleib Sasever wasn't there, and he said, you see, you think your rebbe is such a big tzadik, he doesn't even show up for slichos. So the Chassidim said to this misnagid, they said, You know why our rebbe doesn't come for slichos? Because he goes up to Shamayim, and that's why he's not in shul. So this misnagid rolled his eyes. He goes up to Shamayim. What a ridiculous concept! He's sleeping in. That's why he mislechos. He didn't go up to Shamayim, and the next day he sets out to prove it. And he goes to the house of Rav Meishalay B'Sassover. And he's waiting to see what time he comes out of the house. He gets there alaboker early in the morning because he wants to catch Rav Meishalay B'Sassover. And Rav Meishalay B'Sassover comes out of the house, and it's earlier than this misnagid thought. He's not dressed in a Chassidus Rebbe's clothing. He's dressed like a peasant, like a regular peasant.

28:00 And this misnagid is watching him. He says, "Where's he going?" And he follows from a distance. And Rvmyishleib Sasser goes into the forest. And he starts chopping down wood. And girls, I don't know if you know what chopping down wood means. Chopping down wood is hard work. If you ever go and you see somebody chopping down wood, it's not like a small thing. To take an axe and to hit it at the right angle over and over again, it makes you very strong. It's very hard work. And there's Rvmyishleib Sasser, and he's shvitzing his head off. And while he's chopping wood He's saying slichos. This misnagid rolls his eyes. Look at this guy. He's not even saying slichos in a shul. He's not saying slichos with a minion. He's saying slichos while he's chopping wood. That's not a very high level at all. And he's dressed like a peasant. This guy is a faker. So he's sitting there. I got him now. And now Rav Meir Shlomo Zassiver. He's finished with all of his wood. He puts it in the wheelbarrow and he rolls it to a house. And he the house that he goes to. This misnagid. He knows that house. It's a woman who lo alain who lost her husband.

28:59 It's a woman who doesn't have a husband anymore. And Rvmyishleib Sasever says to the woman, "Do you need wood?" She said, "Yeah, I need wood for my fire, but I can't afford any wood right now." He goes, "Don't worry about it. You'll pay me later." And he gives her a whole thing of wood. And then he continues on and he goes to another house where he knows that there is a husband, but the husband is very sick and he can't provide for the family. And the wife opens the door and he says, "Do you need wood?" And she says, "Yes, I need wood, but I can't afford any wood. My husband is sick." He goes, "Don't worry, you'll take it on credit. One day you'll pay me back." Until he empties his entire wheelbarrow, going over to every single person in the community that doesn't have. And then, he goes back to his house and dresses up into his rabbi's garb, and then he goes to shul. And this misnagid, from that point on, he became the biggest chassid of Rav Meishal Eibzassover. He said, "That I want that person to be my rebbe." And the next day, when he came to Shul, he was all of a sudden a devoted chassid of the Rebbe, and he was davening. They said, "You see, you became a chassid of the Rebbe, right? I told you he goes to Shamayim, and that's why he's not at Sluchos."

29:58 So this former mesnagid, who is now a chassid of Rabbi Moshe Leib Sa'asiver, says to the chassidim, "You're wrong. He doesn't go to Shamayim." He goes much, much higher. There's such a thing as going to Shamayim, and there are people who know how to bring Hakadosh Baruch Hu down into this world. It's because the Torah made them sparkle. Before we go into the Mishkan, after Har Sinai, the single most spiritual thing a person can do is learn the halachos. What if I damage somebody? What if I lose an object? How do I return it? What does it mean to be a shomer? What does it mean to guard somebody else's stuff? You know what it means, girls. It's a very simple thing. These laws aren't just laws. They're meant to make you sparkle. Anybody could follow the law. That's what you were saying before. Aren't the laws important? The laws are very important. But the reason why the Torah makes the mishpatim come before the mishkan is because you have to know if you want to walk into the house, you have to know that following the rules is what makes it a house. It's what makes it a home.

30:57 People could live together, and they could be total strangers. Some people live in the same house, and they don't have a home. A person who knows how to follow the halacha knows how to make their relationship sparkle—not just with each other, but also with Hashem. I'll share with you one last thing. The hour is very late, and you girls are exceptional. I see the dedication of being here so late at night and pushing yourselves—unbelievable. I'm blown away by you girls in Beit Miriam. Wild, mamish wild. Every week I come, I'm exhausted. I don't know how you girls are doing it. Listen to the Katsker Rebbe. Last line from the Katsker Rebbe. The Katsker Rebbe in this week's parsha says, "Va'Anshe Kodesh Tiyonli." Vaanchei Kodesh literally means and you shall be holy people to youni to me, says the Ktzer. First it's vaanchei. First you have to be a person.

31:45 And then Kodesh to youni, and then you could become holy. First you have to be a person who recognizes that you're a mensh. You have to treat people in this world like a mensh. If you do that, it could make you holy. Then it could make you sparkle. You want to walk into the Mishkan. First, you have to be a mensch. Being a mensch doesn't just mean I do for somebody else; it means that I sparkle for somebody else. So I'm going to give you a challenge. Every target has to be actionable. You're going to leave the shir tonight. You're going to go back into the dorms. You're living with people. It's very hard to live with people. There are rules in the dorms. There are rules, not just in the dorms. There are rules in the shir room.

32:26 But you could follow the rules, or you could follow the rules. So you could follow the rules, you guys as roommates. You say, what time do we turn off the lights? It's like, we could turn off the lights because that's the time we made. But some people turn off the lights, but they don't turn off the lights. They turn off the lights, but then they put their phone on and they're listening to their phone out loud. Or even if they have their AirPods on, sometimes in the dark, the phone makes more light than the light itself. And then girls start complaining, I can't go to sleep. You've seen this show before, right? Or maybe there's a fight about the temperature in the dorms. I've come to learn that temperature in girl dorms is a very big issue. I'm sorry for whoever I just offended. I didn't mean to offend any of them. It could become very annoying, and it could become very difficult to deal with. So I have a suggestion for you.

33:13 I have a suggestion. Tonight, you could say "I'm going to do everything. I'm going to turn off the lights. I'm going to put in my AirPods." But you could go the extra mile and sparkle for your roommate. And I want you to know that this thing that you're doing right now It's training grounds. How do you make other people feel? How do you make your children feel? Children can tell when their parents are doing something with resentment. You know what that means? Children can tell when a parent is doing something because they have to, versus because I'm so lucky to be in this relationship with you. It matters the way that you do it. The way that you turn off the light matters. Some people turn off their lights but they roll their eyes. And some people say I'm turning off the lights because she's tired now, and maybe I'll leave the room and I'll come back when I'm ready. And when I come back in the room, how do I come back in the room? Quietly. I don't come back in the room just throwing open the door and slamming it. There's a way. There's a way that we can treat each other that makes us sparkle. And if we do it with each other, Beis Hashem, we'll do it for Hakadosh Baruch Hu. Girls, have a wonderful Shabbos.