Matos / Masei - Having the Hard Conversations to Bring Mashiach

2:30 We left Mitzrayim, we built the Mishkan. We were attacked, we survived. All these different things happened. One would imagine that the ending of the story would be exceptional. And it seems to be very mundane. So obviously, every word of the Torah is filled with an infinite amount of lessons. So let's try to delve deeper into what seems to be a very technical story about the children from Shevet Menashe conquering and driving out the Amorites from this place called Gilad, and let's try to see what lessons can be learned even from a seemingly deceptive, simple pasuk. Who is this Ya'ir ben Menashe? Up until now, the Torah tells us about Ya'ir ben Menashe. Ya'ir is from Shevet Menashe. The problem is that if you look in Divrei Hayamim Divrei Hayamim goes through the lineage of Yehuda. Yehuda gave birth to Peretz, Peretz to Chetron. Chetron married the daughter of Machir ben Menashe, and they had a child named Segov. Segov gave birth to Yaer.

3:43 So in Divrei Hayamim, Yaer is not from Shevet Menashe; rather, he's from Shevet Yehuda. His maternal grandmother was from Menashe, but Chavra. From where does one get their Shevet Yehudah from? From the mother or from the father? It's patrilineal. And so it's interesting. We have a stiram psukim on the one hand. Ya'ir is described as Ya'ir ben Menashe in the Torah, but in Divrei Yamim, he's Ya'ir from Shevet Yehuda. Why then, if the Torah knows the lineage that he's actually from Shevet Yehuda, why does the Torah refer to him as Ya'ir from Shevet Menashe? Hear the question. This place, Gilad. Have we heard of Gilad before? The place Gilad is mentioned twice in the Torah. You guys know where it is. Place Gilad comes up twice in the Torah. The first time that Gilad comes up in the Torah is the story of Yaakov and Lavan. We all know the story. Yaakov worked for Lavan for all of those years.

4:49 That's awesome. Yaakov worked. Yaakov worked for Lavan for all of those years. He decides to leave the house of Lavan. Lavan chases him, and where does he find him? The confrontation that takes place between Yaakov and Lavan happens where? In Gilad. That's the first time we hear of it. The second and only other time in the Torah that we hear of Gilad is when Yosef is being sold. After Yosef is in the pit And they decide that they're not going to kill him The pasuk says "Vayeshvu lechol lechem." They sat down to eat a meal, to eat some bread. It refers to the shvatim. Vayisu einayem, and they raised their eyes. Vayiru, and they saw the hinei orchos yisraelim ba migilad And a caravan of Ishmaelites was coming from Gilad, which means the Shvatim saw that they were coming from Gilad. To say there, and the camels were carrying spices, etc. And they were going down to Mitzrayim. So two times in the Torah we hear of this place Gilad.

6:05 Thank you very much, Uri. Two times in the Torah we hear of this place Gilad. The confrontation of Yaakov and Lavan And ultimately, when it comes to Yosef being sold down to Mitzrayim, the Yishmaelim came from this place called Gilad. So now we have our second question for the night. The first question, just to remind us, is the stira in Psukim between Yehuda and Menashe. Ya'ir is clearly according to the Berayayimim. A descendant of Yehuda, he's from Shevet Yehuda, and yet he's referred to in our pasuk as Yair b'Menashe. The second question is, what is the significance of this place, Gilad? Beforehand, it sounded like just a random thing that Klal Yisrael, in the last sukkah of Bamidbar, they conquered Gilad, drove out the Amorites, and Yair b'Menashe took it over, took over the hamlets, and made it Chavos Yar. Now all of a sudden, we start to get the sense that Gilad is a place that has some historical significance to us.

7:13 If it has historical significance to us, we have to try to understand what is the essence of this place called Gilad. What's the connecting factor? Why was it present in the story of Yaakov and Lavan, and why is it again present in the story of Yosef being sold down to Mitzrayim, even though it seems to play a tangential role? And finally, why is it the culmination of all of Sefer Bamidbar? There's a yisod. A yisod in the Torah, super important yisod. It's lotisna es achicha belvavecha. You shall not hate your brother in your heart. What does that mean? The Rambam explains that a person is obligated to confront their brother To confront their friend And to be able to say appropriately, "You hurt me." That hurt. I didn't like that. Most people do not do that for a variety of reasons, which we'll discuss in a moment.

8:19 Most people will go to one of two extremes: either they explode on another person Pouring their emotions all over the other person And thinking that they engaged in a confrontation. In fact, if you speak to people like this, you know how they sound. They go, "Don't worry, I told them exactly how I feel." Just because you had a temper tantrum doesn't mean you told somebody how you feel. The opposite is also true. People will say nothing; they'll let the hate fester in their hearts for so long. And as a result, they destroy relationships. If you care about a relationship When someone does something to you, not everything needs to be said. But when someone hurts you, it's a very difficult thing to process your own emotions and to share them appropriately. It's not a simple thing at all. It requires you to vulnerably feel your feelings.

9:21 The reason why we have temper tantrums and spill out all over another person is because we don't want to feel our feelings. Anger is not feeling your feeling. Anger is masking the feeling that's happening. If you ask somebody who's angry. I don't mean like healthy anger. I mean like rage. If you ask somebody who's experiencing this rage, what's going on for you? They have no idea what's going on for them. To be able to articulate yourself emotionally is a superpower because it requires saying things like, "I feel lonely" I feel disconnected "I feel abandoned." Those are much richer emotional words. It requires a lot of vulnerability because you yourself may not know what's going on. It's not an easy thing when someone hurts you to say the way that I felt when you did that was it brought up deep feelings of rejection and of unworthiness.

10:19 That's not a simple thing at all. But to vulnerably share our emotions when somebody hurts us is what we're called upon to do. And we are going to argue over the course of the next couple of minutes that in some way. The entire Torah From basically the beginning all the way until this last psukim in Bamidbar It's a story about what happens when we don't confront the people we love in a healthy way. That's really the story. It begins with Cain and Hevel. It's a big thing to say, but it begins with Cain and Hevel. Listen to the words of the pasuk carefully. Vayomer Cain el Hevel achiv And Cain spoke to his brother Hevel. And it came to pass when they were in the field. And Cain got up to his brother Abel and he killed him. Rabbeinu says, "What's missing in the pasuk?"

11:21 What? Exactly right. I've come to expect good answers from you this summer. What did they talk about? It says, "And Cain said to his brother Abel." What did they say? The pasuk doesn't tell us. The midrashim, Rashi says, have lots of different interpretations here. But Rashi says an unbelievable answer. He entered into words of quarrel and contention with him to find a pretext to kill him. If you would ask Cain. Did you speak it out with Hevel? Did you speak out your frustration? He would say, "I told him exactly what I was feeling." It's not true, says Rashi. Those were not words that were designed to actually confront what was happening. Those were fighting words designed to create a fight. Did you ever do that, Rabbi? Say, did you ever speak to somebody and maybe not consciously, but subconsciously, or maybe consciously even You said something you knew would start a fight.

12:31 You guys are probably too young to know this, but there was a comic strip back in the day called Calvin and Hobbes. Guys know Calvin and Hobbes. Calvin and I see Baruch Hashem, Calvin and Hobbes is generational. It was in the nineties, and Baruch Hashem, it's all the way here in two thousand twenty-four, and that's why I call it one of my favorite comic strips ever. Is Calvin walking around in a bad mood? And then he makes Hobbs be in a bad mood, and then he makes his mother be in a bad mood, and he makes his father be in a bad mood. And in the last strip, Calvin says, "Nothing is better when you're in a bad mood than sharing it." It's there's real chokma to that. Sometimes we get into a fight with somebody because we were looking for a fight. Did you confront that person? Did you tell them what was really bothering you? Not at all. But you said a lot of words. But what type of words were they? They were not words designed to bring shalom. You see, when you confront somebody You speak and you tell them you're hurt.

13:29 But you don't say it out of anger. You say it with not speaking. Listen carefully. Not speaking from your pain, but for your pain. That's a big deal. Many people are speaking from their emotions, and that's why they're pouring their emotions out over everyone else. Some people are able to regulate their emotions. They'll be able to say, 'I feel this. This hurts.' And because I care about you, I want to share with you that this hurt me. But I am not using the fact that you hurt me against you. I am telling you that you hurt me because I want to be in a relationship with you. The beginning of the stories of mankind, Adam and Chava, after Ganeiden begins. It's really the story of mankind, Cain and Evil. It's really a story about what happens when brothers fight and don't confront each other in a healthy fashion. This is the entire Torah.

14:18 Let's take a look. Let's take a look at the life of Yaakov and Rachel. Does Rachel ever confront Lavan about the life that he leads? Does Leah ever confront Rachel about what she feels about Rachel's relationship with Yaakov? Does Yaakov confront Esau or does Yaakov run away? In other words, if you look at the story, let's take Yaakov and Esau for a second. Yaakov takes the bracha from Esav. He does it justly. After all, Esav sold him the birthright. But Esav goes into a murderous rage, and Esav is not able to contain himself. He's going to do like Cain killed Hevel. He's going to kill Yaakov. So wisely, what does Rivka say? She says you have to run away. There's no healthy confrontation here. But again, what happens when brothers fight? This is not a good thing. Now Yaakov is in the house of Lavan.

15:15 Does Yaakov confront Lavan? All the years that Yaakov is being tricked by Lavan, that he has to work for him under terrible conditions, Does he confront him? No. And at the end, how does Yaakov leave? He leaves silently. No confrontation. He runs away. What happens? We know what happens. Rachel stole from what? What did she steal from Lavan? An idol. What was that idol called? Anyone know? The Tzurafim. Very good. You know what the trufim were? Different explanations, but the Ibn Ezra gives an amazing explanation of what the trufim were. You're two for two tonight. The Ibn Ezra says the trufim were a way. It was like an instrument of divination. You could tell where somebody was in the world. So Rachel took the trufim because she said, if I take Lavan's trufim, he won't be able to find out where we are. You understand? It was a brilliant move that Rachel made.

16:15 But what happens? Lavan chases Yaakov to Gilad. Somehow he knows that he's there. And now there will be a confrontation. Fascinating that takes place in Gilad. What happens? And why does it happen now? So look what the pasuk says: 'Va'yikra lo lavan yegar sahadusa.' In this place, Yaakov and Lavan made a monument of stones. They took a whole pile of stones and put it together. And they said, "We're making a bris here. We're making a covenant of peace between us." And Lavan called it Yegar Sadusa The Yaakov Karlo Galayt This place of Gilad, this mountain of Gilad, where Yaakov Avinu was confronted by Lavan. What does he call it? Galayt By Yomer Lavan Hagala Zen Lavan said, "This pile of stones, aid beinu veincha, hayom it will be a witness to me and you today." Alkein kamar, alkein karismo galeid, and therefore they called it galeid And also the hamitzba. They also called it the hamitzba.

17:26 Asher amar yitzav Hashem beinu veincha, kinnistar ish meireihu. May Hashem look between me and you when we're hidden from each other. Rashi says, kinnistar velo nire ishes reihu. You know what the yeshod of Gilad is? The yeshod of Gilad is Galayd. It's the place where the truth comes out, where you can be a witness, where nothing is hidden. That's why Yaakov and Lavan had a successful covenant, a successful bris that took place in Gilad, because Gilad has the kaiach of Galayd. It has the kaiach of creating transparency that people actually talk about what's bothering them. And if you look, we're not going to go through all the pesukim now. But if you take a look after the shiur, go look in the pesukim. Yaakov speaks his mind to Lavan. He says, "I worked for you for all those years, and you didn't do right by me for all those years." Yaakov finally confronted it, and you know why Yaakov had to confront it?

18:20 Because if Yaakov was going to confront Lavan and Gilad It was going to give him the ability for the next confrontation. What's the next confrontation? Shalom, my old friend. What's the next confrontation? After Yaakov confronts Lavan, who does he confront next? He confronts Sarosha Esav, and confronting Sarosha Esav means he's really confronting who? He's really confronting himself. Wevaser Yaakov Lavado. Yaakov goes by himself. He meets the Malach of Esav that's living inside of him. He has to attack that Malach of Esav before he confronts Esav. He has to wipe out the Esav inside of himself. It begins in Gilad. It continues when he fights the Malach of Esav, and it culminates when he actually confronts Esav himself. Then finally, they go their separate ways. But there is another confrontation A confrontation that doesn't take place—the confrontation between Leah and Rachel Because you see, Yaakov Avinu was a very smart man, but Lavan was a sharp person.

19:24 And the Balagada tells us that Lavan was B'keish Laker as a call. Lavan wants to destroy, wants to wipe out all of Klal Yisrael. How do you do that? So there are many different explanations, but I'll share with you one beautiful explanation. He tricked Yaakov Avinu into marrying Leah first. Why was that so mischievous? What was it about that one move that was so powerful? Because you know what he did. He sowed seeds of descent between Leah and Rachel. You see, Rachelimenu, she gave up that marriage that night willingly. She was a tremendous tzedekes. She did not want her sister to feel the pain of having the younger sister be married before the older sister. But you know who never knew? Leah never knew that she took Rachel's place. That was the genius of Rachel. When Rachel imenu gave over the simanim to Leah, she did it in such a way that Leah would feel like it wasn't even given to me. Like it wasn't like a secret that we, when we were kids, that's how it was. Told over like Rachel, like whispered to Leah. Listen, tonight he's going to ask you for the simanim, and so these are the simanim. It was an irregular way of conversing. She taught Leah those simanim in a way that Leah never understood that she was being tricked.

20:46 That's unbelievable. That Leah never understood that she was being tricked. Where do we see this? Many, many years later. Ruvain in the days of the wheat harvest found dudaim. What's dudaim? Anyone know? Rashi says jasmine was some types of some type of thing that gave you the ability to be more fertile. And Rachel Imenu didn't have children. By the way, could you imagine the pain that Rachel Imenu was watching Leah have child after child, knowing that Leah took her place, and Leah doesn't even know it? Vayavi osam alaya imo, And now, Ruvain brings these dudaim, this jasmine, this pregnancy medicine. He brings it to Leah, his mother, so that his mother should have more children with Yaakov. Vatome Rachel and Leah, and Rachel said to Leah, 'Tni na li mi dudaych bincha. Please give me these dudaim.' You can hear the pain in Rachel's voice. Please help me have children. She turns to her sister, 'Help me have children.'

21:51 Vatomer law and Leah says back to her. Hamat kachtech es ishi. It's not enough that you took my husband. Vela kachta vela kachas gam es duday. And you also want my dudayim now. Vatomer Rachel achein Yishkov imcha alayla tachas duday bencha. So she traded. She says, "Tell you what. You give me the dudayim. You could take Yaakov tonight." Why didn't Rachel cry out and say, 'Your husband? I took your husband. You took my husband.' She didn't do it because she was a tzedekas. She didn't do it because she didn't want Leah to feel bad. But all those years, what was happening between Leah and Rachel. Leah had unfelt feelings about what Rachel Imenu was doing. You stole my husband. You were never supposed to be a part of this equation. It was always supposed to be me and Yaakov. Wild the tzidkus of Rachel, but also wild the pain of Leah that never got shared, that never got resolved between Leah and Rachel.

22:49 And that pain of unconfronted feelings, those words that Cain never really said to Hevel The words that Yaakov Avinu never really said to Esav, because he wasn't able to, because Esav was so angry. The words that Yaakov Avinu said to Lavan and Gilad. Rachli Menu and Leah, they never had that moment. What happens when parents fight? The children fight too. And it came to pass many years later. What happened, Yosef HaTzaddik? He's with his brothers. And his brothers look at him and they cannot speak peacefully to him. Doesn't mean that they didn't speak their mind. They spoke their mind. What does Rashi say? Even though what they did was wrong, Rashi says at least they were acting the way that they felt, but they weren't really confronting Yosef HaTzaddik in a way to create shalom. They were just yelling at him. They weren't able to speak peacefully to him.

23:49 The children continued the fight of Leah and Rachel. And it was expressed in their primary children. Who was the prime child of Leah? Yehuda, supposed to be Reuven, but unfortunately Reuven sinned and he gave the Dudayim to he switched the beds. The whole Maisa, we're not getting into it right now. But the child of Leah becomes Yehuda, and who's the child of Yosef? Who's the child of Jacob? It's Yosef. The machlokus between Yosef and Yehuda is the unresolved machlokus of Leah and Rachel. Which is why many years later What happens? Yaakov Avinu says, "I have to create confrontation between my children; otherwise, who knows what's going to be?" Vayomer Yisrael al Yosef, Halo Achachar R'om b'Shem Yisrael. Yaakov Avinu says to Yosef, "You know your brothers; they left you. They ran away. They were so upset that they ran away to Shem." He says, "Lacha, go there." He says, "I'm going to send them to you." Go chicken on your brothers. Go chicken on the sheep. And bring me back word of how they're doing.

24:59 What was Yaakov Avinu trying to do? He was trying to get them to confront each other and have the painful conversation. The painful conversation that Leah and Rachel never had. He said, "If we don't get these kids to talk, what could be?" And we all know what happened. On that fateful day They took Yaakov, they took Yosef aside, and they threw him down into the pit. And Reuven said, 'Don't kill him; we'll put him in the pit.' And he said, 'I'll save him later.' But what did Yehuda do? Yehuda, as the child of Leah Sell him down to Mitzrayim. Where was their mistake? The mistake was, and this is a beautiful idea, Rabbeinu. They saw the Yishmaelim coming from where From Gilad. That should have been a clue to them. They knew the history of Gilad. They knew that Yaakov and Laban confronted each other in Gilad. They knew that only when there's gallade, only when there's witnesses, only when there's transparency, only when people aren't hidden from each other. Can there be shalom? So when they saw the Yisraelim coming from Gilad, they should have said, 'Ayei vei, what are we doing? We're not actually confronting the problem. We're just selling our brother down to Mitzrayim.'

26:09 The fight between Yehuda and Yosef continues. Unfortunately, Yaakov Avinu's design for shalom between his children fails epically. Until when? Different people could argue different times. Maybe you'll say it was when Yehuda confronted Yosef and saved Binyamin. Maybe he'll say it was then. But there's a problem with that pshat. The problem is that we know there was no peace between the brothers because even after Yaakov Avinu died, what were the brothers nervous about? Yosef HaTzaddik is going to take his revenge. Yosef has been waiting this entire time because we never had the confrontation. You understand? So when was peace actually made? The climax of the story. Takes place in the final psukim of Parshas Bamidbar. There is a child. A descendant of both Menashe and Yehuda. So he's a son of Yosef, and he's a son of Yehuda. He's a son of Leah, and he's a son of Rachel.

27:10 And he comes to what place? He comes to Gilad. And he conquers Gilad. And he conquers, and he says Chavos Yair. Who is this Yair that we're talking about? It's none other. Then the one who the Torah calls him, he's Yair ben Menashe, but in Divrei Hayamim, he's Yair ben Yehuda. They go to that place, and we say there will only be peace between us when we have the hard conversations. I was talking; I had the opportunity to speak with a very Chasheva Adam Gadol, a Tamachachem of the highest caliber And I was talking to him about the Matzav here in Eretz Yisrael with various communities. These communities, unfortunately, we don't have to start giving these communities labels. These communities are not feeling positively about each other right now. And I said to this Avraham Gadol, Rebbe, what's the answer? He said, You know what we need?

28:03 We need to get them in a room together and get them talking. And he's right. It's this week's parsha. If our communities will sit there with these labels, he's modern Orthodox. He's Yeshivish. He's Charedi. He's Hasidish. Within Hasidish, he's Labavish. He's Satmer. He's Viznitz. He's Baba. He's Baba Forty Five. Everyone has their various iterations. He's with this Rebbe. He's with that Rebbe. We have figured out how to make beautiful communities, but unfortunately, what we haven't figured out is how to have the hard conversation. People talk about shalom. They talk about avaschinam, and especially in these times of the three weeks, it's easy to throw out that word shalom. We have to be b'shalom. Achtos. Achtos is hard work. Achtos means that you have to locate the feelings within yourself. Really feel them, and be able to articulate them to your brother in a healthy way Not just yell at him, not just write articles about him But sit down with him in a room. That's a very hard thing to do.

29:05 See this with roommates all the time. Guys could come in as best friends into Kollel. Six weeks later, they're archenemies. What happened? They didn't talk to each other. Something happened. They were offended. They didn't want to have the hard conversation. You have the hard conversation. That's how you bring Mashiach. That's why Mashiach is from both Yosef and Yehuda. You can't have one Mashiach in Klal Yisrael. The Babbush Rebbe's famous line. He says, "How do you know if somebody is Jewish?" You say Shalom Aleichem. What do they say back to you? Aleichem shalom. If the first thing they do is argue with you, that's how you know that they're Jewish. There can't be one Mashiach. There has to be a Mashiach for Yosef, and there has to be a Mashiach for Yehuda. The beauty of the Mashiach of Ben Yosef and the Mashiach of Ben Yehuda is that they're both Mashiach.

29:54 That both of us will live together. That rift, that unspoken words between Leah and Rachel, will finally happen in Yemos Mashiach. And all of us come from various communities, and we have to have the hard conversations. And if you find yourself in a conversation where people are saying, 'this community, or this community is a bunch of leeches, or this community doesn't care about being Shemita Torah mitzvos' Now, bossai If you are sitting in your own echo chamber talking about another community Make no mistake about it—that's just Kain spewing angry words, giving himself an excuse to kill Heaven. Cross the lines, go to the people that you wouldn't talk to. Be curious; you'll learn amazing things. I can't tell you that some of the most rewarding conversations in my life happened with people that I never would have expected. I'll finish with one story, one of my favorite stories.

30:55 I was on a plane. And I'll be honest with you: when I get on a plane, I just want to go to sleep. I don't want to talk to anybody. You just want to relax. I like to sit in a window seat. Some people like to sit in the aisle seat so they can get up and go to the bathroom freely. I don't mind asking other people to get up, but I don't want people asking me to get up. It's a little selfish of me. I like a window seat. You could lie down. Unfortunately Because we booked the ticket late, I got sat in the middle aisle. I'm talking about it's like three four three, and I'm sitting in the aisle seat of the middle. Which means that I'm sitting in the middle seat, so I'm going to get knocked by the drink cart as it goes by, and people are going to wake me up as they go to the bathroom. So I'm already miserable.

31:41 And there was a group of four guys And they refused to sit down because they didn't want to sit next to me. That's their understanding of the halacha. So I'll be honest with you. Ashtay ani masker. I wish I wasn't this way, but I got annoyed. I was like, 'Come on, we have to take off already. I got to get there ready.' We have to wait an hour until everyone plays musical chairs for you to sit down. So I was annoyed, and I was sitting next to a guy who identifies as Charedi from Eshelayim, and he was annoyed too. And the guy sitting next to him from Kiryat Sefer, he was annoyed too. And next to them was a Conservative rabbi. So those are the four of us: me, Eshelayim, Kiryat Sefer, Conservative rabbi. It happens to be that there were four secular Jews in front of us.

32:31 And very graciously they got up, and these four chaver that wouldn't sit next to women sat down in front. So Peseder, now they're sitting. I don't care anymore. I just want to take off. So the conservative rabbi tapped one of the guys on the shoulder, sitting in front of him, one of these four chaver, and he said, "Can I ask you a question?" He said, "Sure." And he said, Would you mind if I asked you why you wouldn't sit down? He said, "I won't sit down because my understanding of the halacha is that I shouldn't sit next to women." He said, "Could we talk about it?" He was exceptionally respectful. Guy said, "Sure." He said, "Do you think you might have offended the women by not sitting down next to them?" So the guy said, "Look, they don't know the halacha. If they knew the halacha, they would know that it's not offensive. I'm just doing what the halacha is."

33:22 He goes, "Yeah, but it's really important not to offend them." The guy says back, "If you paid me a million dollars, I wouldn't violate the halacha. This is what I believe in." The conservative rabbi said back, he said, "Look, we only have daladamos of halacha to live within, and we all have to live within those daladamos. And the guy said back, he said, "I understand" But they have to understand and respect that these are my daladamos. It was a fascinating conversation. Now I'm intrigued. I like stories, so I'm watching this happen. It's a pretty cool conversation. The guy turned around. We continued with the flight. And I turned to this conservative rabbi and I said, "Would you mind if I asked you a question?" He said, "Not at all." I said, "Why did you feel comfortable asking him that just now?" He said, "What do you mean?" I said, "Well, let's say the people in front of us were Amish" And they wouldn't sit down next to women because that's the halacha of being Amish.

34:13 Would you have felt comfortable to tap him on the shoulder and have that conversation? This conservative rabbi was a very honest guy. And he said he stopped. He thought about it and he goes. I would not have felt comfortable. I said so. The only reason you feel comfortable talking to these people about their way of behaving is because they're your brothers. And he goes exactly. And then he asked the guy from Yerushalayim if we could switch seats. The guy from Yerushalayim was happy because he got an aisle seat. The conservative rabbi sat next to me. We ended up schmoozing for hours. And we started talking. It was an amazing conversation. We don't see the world in the same way, but I learned a lot from him that day. As long as we stay in our separate camps And it's not like Chazal say of Ovehem as habrios ol makarv lataira And Chazal point out, why does it say brios?

35:02 Because it's speaking about even the lowest level Jew. It's speaking about somebody who's mamish just the creation of Hashem. They're not shomer Torah mitzvos. Can you love that Jew? Can you have the hard conversation? What would it look like if we actually sat down and spoke? I'll tell you what it would look like. It would look like Mashiach. Mashiach is not just a man. Mashiach is a concept. Mashiach is a way of life. A person who lives with Mashiach consciousness is trying to have the hard conversations to rectify the sins of our past. So that we don't leave words unspoken and create machlokus. I thought Rabbi Turetsky said it very beautifully tonight. We're living in a tenuous situation here in Eretz Yisrael right now. Blessed Hashem, everything will be good. It's already good. We scored a hat trick this week. Now we have to see what our cousins are going to respond.

35:56 And hopefully they won't respond at all. But it is a tenuous situation. What should our response be? Chazal say, the Rambam says, whenever anything happens, it's a call to tshuva. Three weeks, we're in a tenuous security situation. And we know, whenever we have enemies from the outside, what happens? Jews band together on the inside. It's an interesting thing that happened over the last couple of days. We're back again to October eighth. No more Charedim, no more Zionim, no more Chilonim. It's just Jews waiting to see what the response will be from Iran and from Syria and from Lebanon, from Hezbollah and from Hamas. Yemach Shemam Vezikram, all of them. Our response has to be a Mashiach response. Let's have the hard conversations and actually work towards Achdus. Achdus is not a catchphrase. Achdus is certainly not a weapon. A lot of people use Achdus as a weapon. They don't like the way somebody is behaving. They go for new Achdus. It's not what Achdus is. Achdus is having the hard conversations so we can actually come together. Be'ez Hashem we'll be zeicher to Mashiach Ben Yosef and Be'ez Hashem to the ultimate Mashiach Ben Da.