Connected - Q&A with Rav Yisrael Kaminetsky and Rav Mordechai Burg

2:23 So it's a very personal kind of a question for me. And Rav Willig answered me at the time, two answers, the two standard answers to this question, I think. And I'd like to share them with you. As you know, the first is the Safer Akram, Rabbi Yosef Albo writes in the Safer Akram, he asks this question and the answer basically is that even though a person might be on a certain level let's say a person is asking for, he doesn't want to get sick He doesn't want to get sick from this virus, please Hashem don't make me sick from this virus So maybe a person is not on the Madregha, not on the level that he really deserves that protection Through Davening and through realizing that it's Hashem who makes a person sick and doesn't, through Davening you can actually elevate yourself to a different status and that you will merit that blessing that you didn't merit prior to that.

3:09 Davening is one of those ways that you elevate yourself to that status. By appreciating the fact that you realize that Hashem is the one who is the Rofeicholom, the one who decides so you can bring yourself up even though you're not worthy of it. So let's say Hashem decided I wasn't supposed to have kids. But through Davening it could be through the tefillah and realizing that Hashem is The one who gives those gifts, the more I realize it, the more I make myself worthy, and Hashem actually rewards me that gift. That's A. The Gemara in Nida, I think it's the Ramon Daf Ayen, has a slightly, very end of Nida, has a little bit of a different approach on this, and that's the second approach I would share. Which is the Gemara says, if a person wants a particular bracha, what should he do? You have to do two things. You have to do ishtablas, you have to try to get the bracha. And the other thing you have to do is tzfilah, you have to pray for it. So the mashmo, the impression of that Gemara is is that, it could be that you actually are worthy of this blessing.

3:57 Maybe you are worthy that the pandemic won't get you. But you have to daven for it anyway. Even if you're worthy for it, even if you're worthy for a particular bracha, you have to daven for it anyway. Because Hashem just set the world up in this way that there's all kinds of brachos ready for people. And you have to daven for them. That's the key to get the bracha. You deserve it. But you may not get it even if you do deserve it just because you have to daven for it. Because there's a key Hashem made the world in a way that davening is the key that opens up the floodgates of the person. Even if you do deserve it. So those are my two perspectives. I guess the second half of, you know, maybe I spoke already enough. There's more to say about the second half of the Kavanan Bemebu L'Rav'e Burg. I have an opportunity to respond. First of all, I want to echo Rosh Hashiva's comments to thank David and Shlomo for putting this together.

4:46 And it's certainly an honor and a privilege to be on a panel with Rabbi Kaminetsky. Tov Bechol Yedid Neffesh of Rabbi Kaminetsky is perhaps a lifelong dream, it's a tremendous chos, and it's certainly a relationship that Baruch Hashem has been privileged to be a part of. With regards to the question, I think I can only add something small. The word palel is actually the word to imagine. Nittorah when Yosef and Yaakov come together after being separated for so many years, Yaakov says, I was never palel that I would see you again. I never imagined that I would see you again. And so the Rebbe Nachal Elom gives us the opportunity to imagine the world as it ought to be every single day. Chazen is from Alashin of Chazon, to have a vision. We have We have a visionary that leads us in a collective imagination.

5:42 And we do that as a community. We don't know why anything happens. It's not our place to speculate and to say it happened because of this Avera and it happened because of that Avera, perhaps in the times of the Neviyyim, perhaps in the times of the Anshek Nessegadola and the times of Chazal. They could do such a thing today, we're not capable of doing something like that. But for whatever reason, the Ribono Shel Olam brought a madgefah into the world. Now it's our opportunity to respond. Hakadosh Baruch Hu tells us not to be satisfied with the world as it currently is. So when we see a person who's poor, it's our responsibility to get involved and we should daven every single day that everybody should have parnassah. We imagine a world where everybody is taken care of. One of my favorite ideas from Risal Vechik that's brought down in Rabbi Sacks' book Nair hayisi gamsa kanti velo ra'isi tzadik nezav vizar mevakesh lachim I was young and I was old and I never saw a righteous man go hungry and his children didn't have bread to eat.

6:44 Ask Shroof Saloveitchik how could that be? We see that righteous people suffer all of the time. How could we say that we've never seen a righteous person suffer and his children went hungry? R'ahisi Rong S doesn't mean you are translating the word R'ahisi Rong. It's N'ar H'isi Gom Zakhanti I was young and I was old, Valo R'ahisi and I never stood by and watched as a righteous man went hungry and his children didn't have bread to eat. So when the Ribono Shel Olam brings things into the world that are not the way the world is supposed to be, it's not calibrated, people are dying, people are sick, people don't have food to eat, whatever it is, it's our obligation to get involved. And as part of getting involved we have to Daven and we have to B'si Chakadosh Baruch Hu to change the world to be the way that will ultimately be in the state of Yom Ha'Mosah Mashiach and ultimately in Olam Abba.

7:31 With regards to the question of is it worth it to Daven if we don't have Kavana? So the answer is what do you mean when you say Kavana? If you mean is it worth it to Daven if you don't have Kavana meaning you don't have Kavana in every single word So then it's certainly still worth a tadaven even though the Rambam is very critical of such a person and the Rambam says it's Kaminetsch'ein omis palo. Okay, but nevertheless, we're all in process. We're all working towards something Ideally, we want to get to a basic state of Kavana However, there is a more profound Kavana that I think is something we can all have Why do we daven because the Rebbe Neshulim wants us to daven. Of course There are many deep reasons for it behind every single mitzvah Tonsa, but on a simple level, on a partial level for us a person has to know that we daven because Hakadosh Baruch Hu wants us to daven and that's what it means to be in a relationship.

8:24 I don't understand all the things that my wife wants me to do but I do them because that's what she wants me to do and that's what it means to be in a relationship. Sometimes it means to be a vat Yedas and so when we come to daven even if we don't necessarily have all the kavana in the world but a basic kavana we have, why are we here? Is the Abishthir wants us to be here? Is it the ideal level? Perhaps it's not the ideal level. But is it an important level? Is it a meaningful level? Is it something that will change the world? Is it something that will change us? The answer is absolutely yes. And of course, mitai shalolishma balishma. Person has to know that they're in process. I was talking with the Talmud today, a wonderful young man, and we were talking about the ideal state of Yiddishkeit. And I said, you know, in 20 years I could never have imagined that I would get here, Rosh Hashalim Todavat tebi. Thank you so much, Rebbeim. So just Shlomo Hershey is wanting to let me know

9:49 to the rest of the sponsored Zichos Hashedah for Yaakov Mirv and Tovarivka and Llewynishmas Taboa Rivka Bas Moshe. And if you would like to make any further sponsorships for another Kaltu'a Kula event, you can reach out to Kaltu'a Kula website and you can also follow them on. The next question we got is about this new movement that started. I don't know I'm curious to hear what the Rebbeim wants to say about this. Is for the Rebbeim's thoughts on Neo Chassidus and what people and Neo Hasidim, what even is that? Some people want to know. So maybe Rav Bury wants to take it this time. We could sneak the answers that way. I'm not sure what the label Neo-Chassidos actually means. I think it's probably more descriptive of a community than a methodology of thought. But I will share this. In the last decade plus of my life, I've been privileged to have the opportunity to really learn a lot of chassidos.

10:58 My journey was a very interesting one because I personally started off in a Yeshiva that was very anti the learning of Chassidos, a very wonderful Yeshiva, a beautiful Yeshiva. But ultimately I did not stay in that Yeshiva and I went to learn by Rav Yehudah Parnish Shleetah. And Rav Parnish and I became very close, Baruch Hashem, I learned with him for eight years. And in that time, very early on in our relationship, Rav Parnish said to me, and again it was one of the formative moments in our relationship Nitzotzos Rav Baruch extracting the Shabbos Chassidus

12:26 Roshraga Fievel Mendelavitch was criticized when he founded Tyrev Vadass so he had chassidus Shabbat Shereba Yim and He had Litvashir Rebbeim from the classic Lithuanian Yeshiva world. And they said, you're making a cholint over here. People are going to get confused. They're going to have different ideas. It's going to be too complex for them. Since when does a Lithuanian Yeshiva like Torah Vadaas have Chassidus Rebbeim in them? Sir Ashwaga Fievel Mendelavish said a very beautiful marshal. He said imagine a man who has two daughters. And the daughters, they get married to young men who are bar-chashem sitting and learning in Kailil and the father-in-law is supporting them. And so one of the husbands, he only eats meat, and the other husband he only eats milk. So every day they would come to this father-in-law's house and they would sit at three separate tables. One table would be for fleshics, one table would be for milchics, and the parents would sit in between.

13:35 Unfortunately the father-in-law, he fell on hard times, and while he was still able to support his children, he was no longer able to provide separate meals. So they came the first day after the father-in-law announced that he's not going to be able Shabbat ha-mishim tovot tovot tovot tovot tovot tovot tovot tovot Gomara Shechisan Hedron Rachmanel Libeboit Hashem Hashem Hashem v'vasham Tov ad in mind Gomara Shechisan Hedron Rachmanel Libeboit

15:07 Hashem Hashem v'vasham Tov ad in mind Now, Gemara says in the Sechesan Hedron, Rachman El Libaba'i, that Hashem wants our heart in our service. There are some people that think that Judaism is basically a book of do's and don'ts, and as long as I can protect myself and do the right things and not do the wrong things, so I'm a good Jew, I'm a great Jew. So the Gemara N'Sar Hejun says that that's not entirely accurate. The Rachmana Libebay is an incredible story Which I'll just say very very short from Ramosh from Ramosh Ramosh Shafinstein's father That Ram Shor has in one of his sarm. It's one of the stories that's the most Scary stories frankly for me I'll just give you the short version Rosh HaFaisim's father was a rabbi in a community in Russia and he was very friendly with another rabbi. He was the rabbi of the neighboring community.

16:26 And they made a deal. They were good friends. Whoever gets up to the Olaman emes first will come to the other one in a dream afterwards and tell them what life's like in the Olaman emes. So sure enough, the other rabbi died first, and two weeks after he passed away, he came to Rosh HaFaisim's father in a dream. And he said to him, so Rosh HaFaisim, his father, asked, knew what's life like in the Olaman emes. Rachmana Leibaba'i The quote neo-Chasidic movement that was referred to in the question addresses a certain deficiency that many people prior to the coming of the general study of Chasidus or the popularization of the study of Chasidus or the proliferation of what's called neo-Chasidus. I think that that movement has filled a void with people. Asrai Bergh just described, a void that people have about serving Hashem with passion, serving Hashem with heart, serving Hashem with your entire being,

17:59 which is not something that's just reserved for the chassidus world. The Gemara in Sanhedrin is for everybody. Rachman Elibu Eroshah Feyn scene would not be described by anybody as a neo-chassidic master at all. He was the gaudel ador by far, and yet he was trying to explain that to have your heart, your full heart in the service of Hashem, that's very very important. What I think is sometimes a danger, and some have accused the neo-chassidic movement of this danger, If there is only the heart and too much emphasis on the heart, one might begin to push the limits of halacha. One might be able to say, if I feel like waking up at 11 o'clock in the morning or 12 to daven shakha, I'm going to daven pass this manor, I'm going to be so excited in my avodah that I'm going to become lax and halacha.

18:56 Tammi-chacham menar tzadikim Tammi-chacham menar tzadikim Hallechik practice and what is outside of that pail? I'll just give you a very bad example, but I think the bad example highlights this nuance of issue. So my Rebbe, R'morachai, willa, kolzam, maybe this will be controversial to people sitting up, but that's okay. As I said, a little controversy is not so bad. But in our Yeshiva, we very much wanted to have a musical halla. We wanted to have halla together with instruments during the halla. I asked Ramor Hechei Willah this question because as I said before I asked him all the questions. And Ramor Hechei Willah was against it. I don't think he was against it on a level of halacha. He was against it I think because as a matter of public policy, he was against it because it's well known that the Reform and Conservative introduced an organ into the synagogue.

20:04 And he felt that as a matter of public policy, once you start doing that, it could bring To many other changes or alterations in davening and if you know everyone who knows he's not very excited about about major changes and alterations in davening That's his opinion on public policy. So that would be an example But I certainly know that many many people do this and I'm not judging them. I'm not saying it's wrong at all That that's very important part of the discussion over here. There could be nuances of difference but but You know my Rebbe advised us to against it and plenty B'Ikir, as R'Berg said, I just want to close also with this, and this is so important on this topic. And I'll share a story, I have a number of stories about this, but Mr. Rogers, the Colonel of Rachah, was very good at this.

20:50 And he was very good at this. Mr. Rogers, the owner of Racha, was very famous for saying that in times of tragedy and difficulty, look for the helpers. I think we tend to live in a place where if everybody is not exactly like me, we tend to rank on people and look for the problems in people. We would do much better to look in the past. I'll just share with you. I was at a wedding yesterday and Rabbi Billet was the messadakuduion. Tanya Rebbeim T

22:56 Ravi Yisrael kaminetsky Mordechai Baruch tovah Shabbat Kaminetsky Mordechai G-dav v'thikra Nitzotzos Rav g-dav v'thikra v'thikra Rav g-dav v'thikra v'thikra v'thikra v'thikra v'thikra perfection – rabbi g-dav v'thikra

24:28 It's all beautiful. As long as everybody is L'shem Shamayim and everybody keeps tari'ach mitzvos, we shouldn't be looking down. To me that's the whole godless. You can't read parashis Vayechi. You can't read parashis Vayechi and not understand this idea. There were 12 tribes. There's a reason why we start with 12 tribes. Yaakov identified the kokoshos of each tribe. Every tribe does things a little bit differently. Look at the last page of Meziel Zesharim. The last page of Meziel Zesharim talks about how a God is to you. A garbage man has the same shahr in Olam Haaba as a person who sits and learns all day long. That's what the Maseel Su'sharim on the last page says. Read the last page. If you don't read any, just read it. There's different ways of doing it. There's people who are like, I just had this week's parashah just from Rav Salveitchik.

25:20 I teach from... Rav Salveitchik has the same idea from this exparsha by Yikro. We're talking about how the poor person who brings the carbon that's a bird carbon, echlamam, echlamam, yevcham, yevcham, yevcham, yevcham, yevcham, yevcham, yevcham, yevcham. We've got to move away from this, if we're all separated. You know, everybody's equal now. This whole thing, we're all in our own houses. We're there, so there's no better or worse now. We're all the same, we're all in the same, same, maybe. And I think so much, so much blood that Yeshim, the person who speaks Slashan Ha'ra is supposed to be thrown out of the machna. We're all alone because we're all supposed to stop judging each other. We're supposed to stop saying, I'm better than you or my way is better than you. I just heard from a frying wax man, he said, Rav Meir Pirmishlant by a teshuva, he wouldn't sit down to the teshuva until he walked around the whole thing and would envision how every single person at the table is better than him.

26:07 So one time there was such a low level peasant, he was having trouble figuring out how this peasant could be better than him, then he thought to himself and he said, you know, if I was such a low level peasant, there's no way I would ever come to a teshuva by my Meir Pirmishlant. So you figure out even that person was better than him. We have to stop judging, we have to stop thinking we're better than people, stop being scared of being who we want or who we think we're supposed to be. There's Shivin Panem Lach Torah, there's 12 tribes, that's what Pirej's life is all about. And don't get caught up whether you should be a chassid, you should be a misnagat, you should be a manorothrax, you should be a shibish. You should look inside you and figure out what is your Shorish Neshamm Mawud, what resounds, what aspects and elements of Torah resound with you mostly. You should have the courage like somebody like Rami Berg had to say, if I was getting in a certain way, Avas Yisrael Loving of every Jew has to be paramount over these petty differences.

27:23 One of my favorite stories is that the L'Bavachir Rebbe had a birthday fibrain. I believe it was when he turned 80 years old. And they invited Rav Saloveitchik to come to the birthday fibrain. Of course, the Rav Saloveitchik and the L'Bavachir Rebbe had been chavrusas. Back when they were in Berlin together, they knew each other when they were younger. And so there was this very long table where the Rebbe was sitting. And the senior chassidim were sitting behind the Rebbe. And they invited, they sent a limo for Rav Saloveitchik. And they invited Rosoloveitchik to come sit next to the L'Babeshi Rebbe on the dais And so Rosoloveitchik refused, he felt that that wasn't b'kavatik for him to sit next to the L'Babeshi Rebbe But he ended up sitting at the table, but all the way all the way down at the end you could see they have pictures of it And so he was like maybe 20 feet away from the Rebbe all the way at the end of the dais And as Rosoloveitchik was leaving there was a reporter there and the reporter asked Rosoloveitchik jokingly he said

28:17 Roshol Vaychek said, you know, it seems like finally the the GRA and the Baal Shem Tov have made shalom with each other. After all the Labavachir Rebbe was a scion ultimately of the balatanya, the Talmud of the Magid, the Baal Shem Tov and the Saloveitchiks hail from brisk, from Volazian, ultimately from the Vilna Gain. So it seems like there's finally shalom between the Baal Shem Tov and the Vilna Gain. And Roshol Vaychek responded reportedly. He said, no, they already made shalom when they were burned in the same crematoria in Auschwitz. Gautchim comes into command and Christ hect master in most of the Colossae. This is a struggle that the rabb the viewership of the Holy Pesach. For some, it's only because Jesus is The same one that are just ourselves. And also because the ophet is sinceody This one is modern Orthodox and this one is Yeshivish.

29:20 It's such a tragedy that we look at ourselves that way. The Nazis Yemach Shammom, they clarified this for us and we should clarify it for ourselves, we should know these things. So I'll just finish off with one personal story. One of the things that frustrates me so, so, so much is I fly to America. Unfortunately, too often, I fly to America on behalf of the Yeshiva, on behalf of NCSY, whatever I have going on. Just as in Chagchat, yed Torah, I want to go to minyan, whatever I have to, and this

30:51 conservative rabbi who was sitting in the far left, so he turned to a young man who was sitting in front of him, and he said, do you mind if I ask you a question? He said sure. And he said, can I ask you why you refused to sit down? And so this young man explained – he was probably in his early twenties – that for him, this is his Vision of the Holochah. And he would rather pay a million dollars than violate the Hochiyah. The conservative rabbi said, would you be interested in hearing a response? It was a very respectful conversation. So the young man said, no, of course not. I would love to hear a response. So this conservative rabbi said, listen, we only have the dalitamos of halacha. And we all have to live within those dalitamos. And these women that you wouldn't sit next to, maybe they were insulted by what you just did.

31:37 So this young man responded, and he said, yeah, but they're only insulted because they don't know the halacha. If they would know the halacha, they wouldn't be insulted. The conservative Rabbi responded back, but nevertheless they don't know the halachah and you have to take that into account. Back and forth, back and forth. Fine. After a couple of minutes the conversation ended. I was blown away. It was an absolutely respectful conversation. Because I'm not a person who keeps his mouth shut. So I turned to the conservative Rabbi and I said, do you mind if I ask you a question? So he said, no, not at all. I said, why Why did you feel comfortable asking that young man why he did what he did? So the conservative rabbi was perplexed. He said, what do you mean why did I feel comfortable? I said, if these were Amish people who refused to sit down next to women, would you have felt comfortable saying that?

32:25 So this conservative rabbi was a very thoughtful man and he said, no, I would not have felt comfortable. I said, so then the only reason that you felt comfortable is because you see these people as your brothers and you're trying to reach out to them and say, as my brothers, Shabbat teshuva m'lil havaot teshuva m'lil hiesra b'snim eyes. Thank you so much, Rebbe, and that sums that up. Just as far as Rebbeim's view on cell phones and smartphones, what's been going on?

34:08 Well, I think if we're going to have an honest conversation about the use of smartphones, then we need to have an honest conversation. And Baruch Hashem, we have, it seems like we have over 300 people here, and I imagine that some of them are men. And I imagine that the young men would be, of course, if they weren't embarrassed, and I'm not saying that they should get up and say this publicly, but perhaps they would share with you some of the challenges of modern technology. And we shouldn't put our head in the sand and pretend that those challenges don't exist. I'm not just talking about inappropriate behaviors, but I'm also talking about just wasting time. There's a couple of young men in Yeshiva this year that took it upon themselves to relieve themselves of their smartphone. They said, why do I need it while I'm here during my time, during my years in Israel?

34:57 And it changed their year. And they would be the first ones to tell you that. They said, yeah, it really changed my year. I was able to focus on a whole new way. My wife and I we often talk about the fact that when we were in Eretz Yisrael Wow, it's been so long already, but over 20 years ago. We didn't have cell phones. I didn't have a cell phone I remember my son, Abed, people got cell phones and the schmooze that they gave was there was a game called snake and Snake was managed like a little like it was a little thing that went around and you had to like like eat a little dot And I remember the Rebbe Yim and Yeshiva giving a schmooze about the Nachashi Hakadmyni Nachashakadmoni

36:03 Shabbat Ha-Tepy. And David Mitzvot Yitsevah from Zhemulah. I happen not to be, but I see that my daughter is on my wife's smartphone and I see that David is on a smartphone and Baruch Hashem, so many of us are using modern technology in a positive way. And so I think it's a mistake when we speak about modern technology to speak about it in black-and-white terms. I think like the balan tanya says, there are things that are shlosh klippos atmeyos, things that cannot be used for godly purposes. There are things that are mitzvos. And then there is something called klippos nogo, which basically means everything in between. Hebar Hashem shtayg de veldt in Yeshiva

38:03 And so many of them were using modern technology inappropriately. And so this 12th grade Rebbe, decided by parent-teacher conferences to get up and to share the statistics with the parent body and ninety-five percent of them had said that they were using modern technology inappropriately. And 50% of the parents on their way out of that meeting said to this Rebbe, Baruch Hashem It's not my son, and the Rebbe was astounded. How could it be that 50% of you said that you don't have a problem when the boys are reporting that 95% of them are finding this to be a challenge? So it's important that we not stick our head in the sands. And I'll share with you something else. I'll let Rebbe Kaminetsky speak about this more. Perhaps he can elaborate on the policies of DRS. But I will share with you that when I went to DRS this year, the boys themselves in their bechinas, in their interviews, were sharing with me that the new technology policy that they have in DRS, the fact that they don't have smartphones in the building, it's It's changed their lives. We in Mevasera, we have a No Phone to Yeuel. And it's a great to yeuel. Of course when we announce it, like 80% of the guys are like, yeah it's fine, whatever, it's okay, I can go 48 hours without my phone, but 20% of the guys are push it like it's

39:15 the end of the world and Rabbi, why are you taking away my music? And after the to yeuel kamah payah haht, every one of them says it's amazing, you get on the bus and the boys are talking to each other, they're not just plugged into those giant headphones of Shabbat Tovah Tovah Tovah As Rav Burg mentioned, these are things that could be used to spread Torah, these are things that could be used to reach out to people. Today, Baruch Hashem, we have the opportunity to reach out across the world. There's a Talmidah who unfortunately her father has corona. Because of modern technology, I'm able to reach out and check in and see how she's doing. So these are amazing opportunities, but they have to be used to bring nachas to their vanishah.

40:22 As Rav Burg mentioned, more than half the people on the pornography angle of this, I don't think you could really talk to boys and girls the same way on this issue. So I'm going to totally disregard that part of the question. Rav Burg alluded to it. Everybody here knows, but I know also. Leave that out of the conversation. Gomorrah says, I'll just leave it with what's the same thing with all issues of those types of these serums. Where the Gomorrah says, ain't hapochopus larios. Gomorrah says that you can never trust yourself when it comes to those things, but this is not, I don't think, the venue or the place to discuss that. What I want to talk about is something that one might even be able to argue, and some say it's even more insidious than that. It's even more dangerous than that, and that's where a burg also alluded to, that We made a change in Yeshiva this year.

41:28 And this applies equally to boys or girls, maybe even more to girls, not more to girls, it applies to both boys and girls the same amount. And that is the cell phone addiction that we are witnessing, which is not necessarily connected to pornography, even not, you know, even being all day long on Instagram or all day long on whatever you're on or even just being... And I have the problem also, I'm not immune to this problem also. I am way too addicted to responding to my emails on the cell phone. As Rav Burg very beautifully mentioned, we instituted a policy this year where you're not allowed to have your cell phone at school at all. And I will tell you that I was not in favor of this policy at the beginning. I was a little bit, you know, I thought it was going to be too much for the guys.

42:22 Nitzotzos Rav kaminetsky Mordechai Baruch Nitzotzos Rav kaminetsky Mordechai Baruch Kaminetsky Mordechai Baruch Shabbat You know what, if they could do it, then we could do it too. And the second thing happened, which was we had a freshman parent orientation. And the freshman parents, now we already have young enough parents that know exactly what we're talking about. And we took a poll of the freshman parents, and 95 percent of the freshman parents agreed that we should take away the phones. And we did a poll of the whole school, and to their credit, I think it was 80 percent

43:41 The parents of every parent in the school agreed to the policy. We also polled the kids. It wasn't quite the same. I'll tell you, we polled last year's outgoing seniors and 75% of the outgoing seniors last year. So when the kids wanted to blame it on the outgoing seniors. But 75% of the outgoing seniors voted and we should take away the phones. Easy for them to say they're already out of it. But what's happened in Yeshiva is pretty much unbelievably all of a sudden we saw kids talking to each other again We saw spike ball came back people are actually interacting People that we people are doing all these kinds. It's been so amazingly positive well, and so one kid one kid one of the one of the I Don't want to one of the kids in Yeshiva one of the more colorful kids in our Yeshiva G-d his phone, got his phone taken away for a week, the ruler's on the first time, but says it's away for a week and he came to me at the end of the week and says, Rebbe I want to tell you something This week was the most productive week of my life I learned how to play piano on the internet this week I learned, I did better on my quizzes and my tests this week because I had no distractions

44:54 He said, and this is what he told me, he said, you should know every, 90% of the kids in the school know even though they'll complain and whine about it, they'll tell you that it's actually, they realize it's in their own best interest Tovah Nitzotzos Rav Chazal g-d I have three-quarters of the people checking their phones every two seconds while even I'm talking. How you supposed to focus? To go through a toast miss to go through a toast miss to learn something deeply to connect us him on a deep level it requires concentration they did studies now that people have less less time less attention span that a goldfish a goldfish has nine second attention span people are now down to eight seconds of attention span We don't realize what this is doing and I'm just as guilty. I'm not sure give mister. I'm just as guilty as everybody We need to put it away, you need to have downtime when you're at dinner table with the family, it should all be away When you go out to dinner with your families, it should be a rule of families, put all the phones in the middle, don't touch them Just talk to the people Connections, that's what we're all separate now because we're having terrible connections And I really feel like honestly, and then I wouldn't have the guts to say this, but Chaim Kanyefsky said it So I could say it too

46:27 What does it say about why do you get bajah yeshi? What's the punishment for the sins of the male, for the sins that were not being because, because on the WhatsApp groups, we're just piling on and just, just ranking and ranking and ranking on the groups and we're just sitting there, we're ready to rank on somebody else and rank and rank and rank and this one text them and then on all these chats. The chats are destroying people, we're destroying schools, we're destroying, yeshivas, we're destroying other kids, we're destroying other kids on the chats. Shabbos Yisrael kaminetsky Mordechai Baruch haib We need to have in moderation, we need to have down times, dinner times, connection times. It can help connection. But you have to make sure that you're hours away from you. And I want to just say that the questions are easier than the answers. I don't have any great solutions, but there needs to be some down time.

47:38 Shabbat R'bam, thank you. I'm not sure how much time we have left, but I know we definitely have time for another question, which is somebody wanted to know. This is more of a... I think could be a more controversial hold on everybody. Is it better for a mother to work, make money to support her family financially, or is it better to be used to add home mother to make sure that there's kedushah always in the house? Okay, so first of all, I want to really commend the person for asking the question, I want to commend the person who asked the question into my mind. In this case, this is not just for girls. It has to do with, you know, any advice. I would say like this. I'll answer the question with the following story. When Rav Itzilah Mepetterberg was a student of Rav Yisrael's Salantah, so Yisrael's Salantah asked him, he wanted him to become the rabbi of the town of Petersburg, St. Petersburg. That's why they called him a Vitzelah Mepetterberg.

49:06 So he called up his town and said, I think you should be the rabbi. So Rav Itzilah said to Rav Salantah, Rebbe, I'm a nothing, I'm a lowly person, I don't know anything. How am I gonna be the rabbi? There's so many Jews there, they have so many questions. How am I gonna be the rabbi? I can't do it. So, Mishaal said to him, do you think I would want somebody who wasn't scared to do it? If you're scared about it, then that means you're the right person to do it. If you're worried about it, if you're worried that you don't feel like you have the kaligis to do it, that means you're the right person. That means you're gonna tread carefully, you're gonna think about things before you do it. Shabbat Shalom Are you able to tell me about this issue? I will say it again. I'm too honest about these things.

50:17 My daughter, is killing herself through graduate school now... Because she's married to a and she wants that tammah khal Creation to learn... And to fill himself up with Torah and to be someone who's going to be a Marabetz Torah, and a Lomay Torah... She has three children and she's putting herself through online graduate school. And I would say she gives a lot of time to her kids and her kids are not lacking. There's no one answer like in a lot of these questions. There's no one answer for people. I have great respect to the women who feel like they want to be the primary person raising their kids. And I have great respect for the women who want to go work so they can help support the family. I don't think these two things have to be in conflict. I think that it depends on your own personal show or seshama, what you think is best for yourself.

51:13 Traditionally, the men have been the primary breadwinners and the women are supposed to be more traditionally in more traditional homes. The women stay at home and raise their children. Shabbat Tovim Shabbat T'Taim for your kids and you make sure that the influences on your kids are the right influences and if you're worried about that, that Hashem is going to give you shi'at to the Shemaya and your kids are going to be raised in the right way. And I think my daughter, you know, my mother comes and watches the kids sometimes and she loves it. That's not my mother doing her favor to my daughter. It's actually my daughter doing her favor to my mother.

52:43 Rebbe nachman Rav Yisrael kaminetsky shabbat v'nachman v'nachman v'nachman v'nachman v'nachman I handled the practical part of the question which is I think today most people need to have a dual income especially if they're living in America with the challenges of having a mortgage, having cars, insurance, Yeshiva tuition and so on and so forth. I think for most people we need to have a dual income. In Eretz Yisrael it's a little bit different. I know that there are some parents on the phone on this call and I may be upset them by saying this but I pay 70 shekel a month for my daughter's tuition. And Kaminetsky Nachara I have five daughters which means that I will pay less for their entire tuition from nursery all the way through 12th grade than some of you will pay for one year of high school. So we do Baruch Hashem live with a little bit less here in Eretz Yisrael and as a result my wife who does work but she works from the house and only in hours that really work for her she's able to do that because we do live with significantly less.

54:15 I do want to add what I feel is one important nikudah and this comes from speaking to a lot of women over the years. Baruch Hashem today education for women is so strong and the girls are learning so much Tzach and they are brilliant. They are mamish brilliant. For some of them, perhaps even for many of them, they feel stifled by the fact that they can't use the talents that they have cultivated over the course of their educational careers. Now, I want to be clear, this does not mean to say that these women don't want to be mothers and that they don't want to spend time with their children. Of course, they do. There is no one like a mother. I Be a great father, but there's no one like a mother. A mother is so critical when it comes to raising the children. And yet they're also expressing to me, and I feel their pain. They're saying, I have these talents, and I feel like not using these talents, it's almost like I'm wasting myself.

55:17 Now, if we would have raised these children in Europe, a hundred years ago, they never would have cultivated these talents, so perhaps it was more natural for them. Baruch Hashem is such an amazing education and so many extracurricular activities. And then they're going and getting a great college education and they want to use it. And I totally understand that. I think like Rabbi Kaminetsky said, it's a balance. But the only thing I would caution is as follows. If you are someone that feels that you have something to contribute and you feel like you're stifling that in order to raise your children, I would be concerned for the long-term If you're okay with saying look I have these talents but the thing I want to do is be home, I am with you, that's amazing. If you feel like your mamish like amputating a part of yourself, I can't imagine that long term you're going to be a satisfied mother. I can't imagine that that's going to result in having shawl and bias in the home. I would encourage you to find ways to express Rosham is a brilliant woman and she was offered a full fellowship to go to college. A scholarship is where you have money off. A fellowship is where they pay you.

56:25 And my wife said, I don't really want to go to college. I don't really feel like I need it. She taught herself actuarial mathematics. She became an actuary. She went out to work for AIG. And then after a year, she was like, I don't really want to do this. This is not what I want to do with my life. She wanted to spend more time with my life. Be that day after a year, she was like, I don't really want to do this, this is not what I want to do with my life. She wanted to spend more time at home with the kids and so she made that decision. I supported her either way. I think that to tell a woman today that the talents that she has have to be stifled in order to be a mother is probably not going to be a good idea. But of course, of course, of course, the more time that a mother spends at home with her children, the children are just going to be more simchidic. Rebbe a totally different home. A father just cannot contribute the same things as a mother, in my opinion.

57:19 Okay, I'm not sure how much time we have left. We're getting a little cut for time. It's already two o'clock. But I feel like that's why I want to combine the last two questions into one final question, if it's possible. Which is, how can one stay sane during these challenging times and maintain a muney en Hashem? And then from Rebbe's life experiences, what is the greatest piece of advice that Rebbe can give someone? Just as a closing, a parting statement for Q&A. I'll go first just so that I could let Rebbe Kamenetsky finish because I think it's going to be more powerful if Rebbe Kamenetsky finishes and I'll give a very brief answer. I think that in terms of what we can do to stay sane, we can let go and let God. We are not in control and sitting there with all this anxiety of what's going to be and what's going to happen, I think this is a great opportunity for us to really put the Amunah that we've learned about our entire lives into practice and we can make it real.

58:24 B'Simcha Rekognizing that we're exactly where we're supposed to be. The Rebbe Nachman had a better plan for us than the one we had for ourselves. I think also it's important, as much as we're doing that, to really focus on being emo anochi b'zara. People are mamish suffering. And there's been so many schmoozen about how we could use this time for growth. And that's wonderful, that's great. That's how a Jew behaves. When a Jew is in a tough position, we think about, okay, why are we in this tough position? How can we grow from this? How can we gain from this? But at the same time, if we're not no sib olam havero, if we're not experiencing the pain of our fellow yiddens, so then something is off. And that's what my Rashi Shiver Rabbi Bander, Shalita, my elementary school, Rashi Shiver used to tell us all the time, you have to be emo anochi b'tzar, you have to feel the pain of your friends.

59:13 And I think that's the way we stay sane. This is the Rebbanash Shalom's will. We're being mavakal ourselves to the Abishtir's will. And now let's reach out to those people that are suffering and be with them in their pain. In terms of something that I've learned over the course of my life that I could share with you that will be meaningful, I can only tell you that life is a process. I wish I could tell you that when I was in my young 20s I thought I had it figured out. I really did. It's hard to believe that I really thought I had it figured out then but I thought I did. I thought I had a path and here I am and it's 20 years later and the path that I thought T In terms of the issue of Amunah, I pretty much have the same thoughts as Rav Burg. The only thing I would add, which is not really adding, it's just restating really what he said. One

1:00:43 of the individuals who has inspired me in terms of his Amunah is one of my talmidim, Rabbi Shabbat G-dosh Grayshauer Some of you may have seen what he wrote on Twitter recently. He had nine points to make. I'm not going to go over all of his nine points, but I'm just going to say he almost throws it in as an aside. He says that so many people are having trouble dealing with this situation because they've never had their lives turned upside down in this way before. And it's true, and I want to be clear. I don't want my words to minimize the fear, the uncertainty, and I want to validate that. Vay Cabinetunhir Vsmirzot darkness Vay VayAPUnim vav

1:01:58 Baruch Taimi Yimim Ah, Kaddush Baruch understands that we're human beings, it's right it's all for the good, right it's all for the good. But you still make a different bracha, it's not exactly the same bracha. Kaddush Baruch understands you just lost somebody, you're gonna be in pain. You say, die in an MS, it's okay. That Babinell says a similar word on fear. We're scared of the unknown, it's normal to be scared, and it's okay to be scared. And when things like this happen, it's normal, it's totally normal. Shabbat Teshuvah Teshuvah And after a long battle with a terrible illness, he lost his wife. And I will never forget, as long as I lived, the first words that he said at the funeral of his wife.

1:03:30 These were words of introduction. He said these were words of introduction. And he said, we have to always remember that the Ribono Shel Olam does not work for us. We work for the Ribono Shel Olam. The Ribono Shel Olam does not have to answer to us as to why he does what he does. He doesn't have to explain himself to us. We work for the Rebbe Nachman, we receive, we accept. We've accepted a lot of good that the Rebbe Nachman did to us. And we also accept that which doesn't look like good and it looks like very bad. And Klal Yisrael has had many many many tsaros in its history. Klal Yisrael had a Holocaust. Klal Yisrael has had a lot of pain and suffering. There have been a lot of terror attacks that have taken away young people. There's a lot of things in this world that don't make sense to us. That don't make sense to us.

1:04:15 And if we would be the rebels, should we make sense? We have to simply have emunah bshutah, we have to have simple trust and faith in Hashem. Just like when a parent, when a parent chastises a child, a lot of times the child doesn't understand it. But how do we maintain emunah, it's very difficult. I don't mean to say that it's easy. But we have our Rabeim and our role models, our Tamir Hachamim and our inspirations who are models of emunah. And like I said, for me it comes from one of my tell me them who, aside from all the other words that we have. Just in terms of one piece of advice, I'm going to cheat a little bit and give two pieces of advice. One of them I already sort of said, already four or five times, through my words. But my main piece of advice, if I can give one piece of advice, it would be that any time a person that I totally agree with, or a burg said, very, very beautiful, life is a process, I agree.

1:05:13 The only other thing I would add would be any time in life that you have a decision to make, that you have an act to take, should I do this or should I not do this? You should ask yourself one simple, which is not so simple, one simple question, what does the Rebbeonashlam want from me in this scenario? What does Hashem want from me? Now it's not always easy to know what Hashem wants to do, and for that, that's why I'm going to take the liberty of adding one other piece of advice. As-Salaamu Alaykum wa rahmatullah Well, so that question the question they have to ask yourself is what does Hashem want, but it's not always easy to know that Hashem wants So it's great to have it's what the Mishneh says that tells ya hinasei leh'ach arev And have events like this and have but not just events like this. Everyone should have their own their own person that they can go to their own go-to person that they can go to for inspiration for halachic guidance for advice. For things of that nature And I think that if we have that lifeline that Talabil lani rabbreaderh says I can't tell you the strength or a Mordechai Jewish. Just close that one story One story

1:06:40 Yisrael Kaminetsky Mordechai Baruch I don't know anything. I'm 23 years old. I can't answer this question way too hard for me. He says, no, I can't go to Rabbi Willoughby. If you want to go, you can go to Rabbi Willoughby. Will you ask him? So I went down the hallway. The question was asked to me in the third floor based message. Those were the first tall, the old third floor based message. And Rabbi Willoughby's room was 317. He was right down the hallway. So I said, okay, yes. Good. I went down the hallway and asked Rabbi Willoughby the question. I'm not answering the question. I want you to answer the question. I want you to go back and answer the question. I said Rebbe, I This is two ways. I want you to ask the question. That was probably the single biggest you know a Moment of change not that I really feel like I have the answers but but there's many different people There's so many different people out there that could be helpful You never know where you're gonna get the the aids are from where you're gonna get the advice from, you know We know who our Abam are, who the people who are close to us, who the people are. They're not going to be perfect.

1:08:07 They're not going to always give you the exact correct advice. But at least you'll have somebody to answer those life questions. You'll have somebody to go to to answer those life's questions. And Amir Tashhem, we should all be Zocha to strengthen our Amunah in this time. That when we have time alone to think, to be with ourselves, to think about what's really important in life, it's a special unique opportunity. And hopefully Klal Yisrael will use this time to think and to grow and to become better in all these areas. And hopefully Hashem will deliver us with Mashiach Tzedkeinu in this month of Nissam B'Nissah Hasid N'Ligael. And even if he does not decide to deliver us with Mashiach, we will still grow. If Chaz B'shaan Rachman El Tzam we don't merit it, we will still use this opportunity to grow and develop so that we'll get that much closer so that ultimately we'll be Zocha to merit that Ulu.

1:08:53 Thank you again to David and to Shlomo for entering to Rebbe for putting this together. I hope you all really appreciate it. That's the show. We should have many more opportunities to get together. Amen. Amen. Thank you so much. Amen. Thank you everyone for joining. Thank you to our sponsors, Teshlamo O'Rishi, for allowing us to use Kholotor Kula's platform to spread this amazing question and answer. We had hundreds of participants. It was really awesome to see everyone here and thank you, Rebbe, for your time.