Chapters
Transcript
Automatic transcript; may contain mistakes, especially in Hebrew.
As I mentioned in the introduction There's really two parts to the Tefillah year. There's the fundamentals and there's the technicals. The fundamentals go into the ideas behind Tefillah, answering all the fundamental questions on Tefillah. And then having a better understanding of what Tefillah is about. And then there's the technicals of going through the Seder. As I mentioned before, we're not ready for the Seder yet. We have a lot of building of general principles to do before we get to the Seder. We will get to it in due time. In the introductory shear, the first shear I asked you guys to write a letter. And as I mentioned, there is no right or wrong way to do this. However, I would still like to discuss the type of letter that you wrote And to try to explore perhaps. Some of the letters that some of the greats have written before us.
So they don't want to share, not necessarily the content of your letter. You don't need to know your private conversations with Hashem. But sort of like what the general gist of the letter was like. Shana told me. Yeah. Requests. Requests. Requests. How many of you had that in your letter requests? That's a big one. To ask Hashem for things that we need. Fair enough. Anyone else? Thank you. Thank you. Appreciation. Thanks for everything that Hashem has given us. A lot of just like thank you And like sort of processing. I'm trying to understand you. I'm like those sort of things, like sort of writing out, like philosophical sort of. I'm saying like, no. I mean like Sort of writing out your thoughts. Yeah. So not anything specific, like thinking or asking, just writing out my thoughts. Just that, just got it. Out of curiosity By show of hands. How many of you had a very easy time doing this?
Read the full transcript
And how many of you had a very hard time doing this? Okay. As I mentioned, it doesn't make you better or worse if you can do this well or not. This is just something that I think is a sort of a good feel as to where you're at in terms of being able to communicate your thoughts, specifically to Hashem. So hopefully it's something we'll get to work on more. But I would like to take an opportunity to visit some letters that others wrote. Now these aren't letters, but these are more conversations or tefilos that some of the greats that we base all of tefillah on have had. So this conversation is based on a Gemara in Brachos. Starts on Lamed Aleph and base. By the brackets V'atidor neder V'atomar Hashem tzvachos. This is Hannah talking And it says, "Did anyone know who Hannah was in Tanach?"
She was the mother of Shmuel. Very good, the mother of Shmuel. And this was talking about before she had Shmuel. V'atidor neder, v'atomar Hashem tzvachos. Omer Rabbi Lazer, what was Hannah saying? From the day that Hashem created the world, there was no one who called Hashem that name. Chana came and called Hashem this name. So what was she saying? Chana was saying before Hashem. Mikol tseveit zavakos shibarasa b'alamecha From all the thousands and thousands of stars that you created in your world Kashet beinecha shetitan li ben echad Is it so hard for you to give me one kid with all the unbelievable things that you created? Just one kid is all I ask. Mashul ma adamardomah What's this comparable to?
What parables are there for this? For a king, a regular king, who made a big party for his slaves. A poor person came up to the door and stood by the entrance. He said to him, "I'd like one slice of bread." They didn't listen. They didn't give it to him. Dochak, he pushed his way in, the nichnas eitzal laMelech, and entered into the king, Amrle, and he said to him, Adoni aMelech, my master the king. Mikol suda shasisa, from all the suda that you made here, all this unbelievable meal that you made here, Kaseve enecha lita prusa achas, is it so hard for you to give me one piece of bread? This is what Chana was saying, Hashem She was arguing, Hashem, you made this unbelievable world, you're all capable. You definitely can do it. Am I really asking for that much? The Gemara continues.
I'm just going to take snippets of the conversation. Imra tira. What is this referring to? Amr le Rabbi Lazar. Amra chanah lefnei Hakadosh Baruch Hu. Chanah said before Hashem. Ribonu Shlolam. Imra If you hear what I'm saying, see fit to do what I ask. Mutaf Then it's good. Vimlav, and if not Tira. You will see. Alech v'istat der b'fnel Alkana bali. I am going to go seclude myself with another man while I am married to my husband Alkana. V'kiban dimi statrena And the rule is when somebody secludes themselves with another man, mashkuli me'sota. They're going to force me to drink. The special water of the soda. Viata ose tarasla plaster And you can't make your Torah into a lie, because Shneimer it says in the Torah, vini kisa if she's innocent, vini zrazera She'll have a kid. So that means that she is essentially what was the word used? Blackmail.
That's really rough. Hannah is the example. If you were to pick two personalities that we try to mimic and base our tefillah on It's Hannah and Moshe. These two. I ask you a question: Does anyone's letter sound like this? No. Go a little further down to the next brackets. We'll talk about why it's probably a good thing. I'm definitely not trying to get you to threaten God. The Chana he medaberes aliba. Chana spoke about aliba. What does that mean? Amr Reb Lezer Mishum Reb Yosi ben Zimra. Al iskei liba Amr Lefana. She was talking about her liba, ribono shelolam. Khamashibarasa b'isha. Everything you created in a woman. Lo barasa daver echol devatolah You didn't create anything for nothing. Enaim liros eyes to see, az naim lishmoa ears to hear, choteim lahariyach a nose to smell Peledaber a mouth to speak, yodaim lasos pemalacha hands to do work Raglaim lahalich b'hen legs to walk, Dodi lahanik b'hen a chest in order to nurse a baby. I ask you, Hashem The chest that you gave me, lama
Why'd you give it to me? Lo lahanik b'hen, didn't you give me them in order to nurse? Tan liben vaanik b'hen Give me a son. And I will be able to nurse. I know what you're thinking. Can't bring a raya from one person. It's just Chana. Turn the page. So the Gemara continues Brings another example from Moshe Rabbeinu in the middle of the page. Vatohanichalim, Hashem says, "Leave me" Vicharapi b'hem. I will let off my anger at them, va'achaleim, and I will destroy them. I will make you into a great nation. Hashem talking to Moshe. Amr Rabbi Yevol says "Il Male Mikra Kassuf Yevshel Amr." If not for the fact that the Torah wrote it, we would never be able to say it. What do we learn from this? Malame, we learn Shetufsu Moshe Lakodesh Baruch. That Moshe grabbed Hashem. Ka Adam Shutofes His Chavero, like a person grabs his friend. With his clothes, and says, "I will not leave you alone until you forgive the Jewish people and forgive them.
Little further ahead, I'll just read a little bit more. I'm Rabbi Lazar. This comes to teach us. Until he made him sick. Let's go further. Zechor, la'avram Yitzchak l'yisrael. Remember avram Yitzchak in Yisrael, avdecha. What's Bach? My Bach. Amar Rebbe Lozer. Amar Moshe Lefnei Hashem Baruch Hu. Rebbe Moshe Lelak. Il Mali Nishpat leim Bishamayim Muvarets. If you would have sworn to the Jewish people. Through heavens and earth, I would say, just like heavens and earth will one day disappear, so too will your shvua, your oath. Disappear. However, you swore to the Jewish people on your name. Chai b'kayim ol leolamin Just like your name lasts forever. Kach shuasa kiyamta la'olam leolamin. One more Gemara. Once again Moshe taking it to Hashem. Wait for this one. We say there's a difference between Moshe and Hannah. He didn't rank on God, at least
Mevil diyachol es Hashem. They will say You are incapable, God. What is this referring to? Yochol Hashem ibaylei. It should say Hashem. They will say you are not capable. Say it in a male terminology. Yochol. Why yecholas? Amar Rabbi Lazar. Amar Moshe levena. Baruch Hu. Ybonu shelolam. Akshav Yom Ruvah shelolam. You know what the nations of the world are going to say? Toshash kochol kinakeva. Look at this God. He's as weak as a female. Rank. Ve'eno yachol lahatzil, And he can't save the Jewish people. This weak God can't save the Jewish people. Amar kadosh baruch hu leMoshe, so Hashem said back to Moshe Valok faro nisim brus ha'cisim lehem alayim. Didn't they see what I did by Kreish Yamsuf? Amar lefunav ribonu shul adai yishlem lomar. They could say "LeMelech echad yachol lahamod." That you were able to stand in front of one king, Paro, thirty-one.
He couldn't. Amrav Yochanan Minayin Shechazar, Hashem Baruch Hu B'ho Dalo. How do we know that Hashem backtracked and admitted and agreed to Moshe? Because it says in the pasuk Which we're going to say in Ritz Hashem, we start saying Slichos, Vayomer Hashem Solachti Kid Varecha. I forgive, like you said Like you insisted. Tanodebei Rebbe Yisrael, Kidvarecha asidim umos haolam lomarkein. In the future, the nations of the world will say Ashrei Talmid Shirabo Modela. Phrase worthy is the Talmid, the student that his Rebbe admitted to him. What else does it say about Moshe Rabbeinu and this relationship with Hashem? Vulam Chayani, Amar Rava, Amar Reb Yitzchak Melamed. This comes to teach us. Sh'amar la'kam shbaru leMoshe. After all this Moshe really fighting with Hashem from beginning to end. You would expect Moshe to really get it. What did Hashem say? Hichisani bedvareh. You brought me to life with your words.
Chana faces a challenge. Chana doesn't just sit there. Chana doesn't just say to Hashem It's all for the best. Whatever you'd like. Thank you for everything you've done for me. " What does Chana do? Chana goes out. Chana goes out. Chana goes out of Hashem. She insists. She persists. She even threatens Moshe Rabbeinu. Hashem knows what's best, doesn't He? So Hashem, you want to destroy them? If that is your will, O God of mine, please go ahead and destroy them. That is not what Moshe does. Moshe fights. Moshe argues. Moshe insists. Moshe holds on to Hashem and says, "I'm not letting you go. I'm not allowing this to happen." In fact, if you look throughout almost all the chilos of the tzaddikim and the gedolim, as quoted in the Gemara and in Navi You will find And you will get frustrated because it will sound like they are almost acting to God in a chutzpahnik way.
Why is this okay? Why is it that we see that? These are the kinds of tefilos that they had. But yet our tefilos don't even resemble this in any way whatsoever. Why do you think that is? Like when you're It shows like you really, really, really want it. And maybe when you're asking God for a crazy big miracle for you You gotta really, really want it and also answer the same question about why art films aren't this way because maybe we're not at the level where we can say that with sincerity and we would be led off to the wrong path. So let's state an obvious difference. Why is it not? Let let's state an obvious difference. An obvious difference. There's no doubt that they were greater And there's no doubt that they knew that the things they were asking for weren't exactly asking for a Ferrari. They weren't exactly asking for things that had nothing to do with their growth.
They were asking for things that they thought would be beneficial. But still, the question remains. Even so, even if they thought, even if they were great, even if they knew How do you speak to Hashem like that? If you asked me, if you compared the tefillah that any of you wrote in your letter and the tefillah that I would have given versus the tefillah of Chan and Moshe, I definitely would have said that the more appropriate tefillah would be mine. Not the tefillah of Chan and Moshe. So what's the difference between the two? I want to leave the chutzpa aspect aside because, again, as you said, we're not on the same level. But there is something I want to bring out here that I think is lesson number one in tefillah. I know what the difference And I speak for myself. And I probably speak for most, if not all of you.
What is the difference between Hannah, Moshe, and us? It's not just that they're tzadikim and we're not. The difference is Is that to us God is the fairy tale godmother. He's this tooth fairy that exists somewhere in the universe. Is involved in my life in some capacity. I guess he created me. I appreciate him for what he's given me. I ask him for things that I need But I don't see God as the one-stop shop. I don't see God as the be-all and end-all. I don't see God that if I don't get him If I don't sway him. If I don't change his mind, then it's not going to happen. When we need a raise, when we need to make more money What do we do? We go to our boss. We work harder. We probably throw in a tefila during Shmack Holenu or during Barei Cholenu, an official Hail Mary, an official little something.
I probably shouldn't say that. Official, something to throw it in there, like yeah, God, have me in mind. But what's really gonna make the change in terms of me getting that raise? It's gonna be me working extra hard. It's gonna be me being good buddies with my boss. Certainly, that's a shatlas. You are supposed to work hard. You are supposed to try to sway your boss. But the tefillat Hashem. It's sort of. Now I know you all think it's important, let's just be real. We don't see it as really that all important. We don't see it that he holds the keys and only he holds the keys, and everything that we do other than that is sort of like a tanai, a condition that we have to do hestadlus. Hashem wants to do it in the world, but at the end of the day, it all comes down to one thing.
Does Hashem want this or not? The difference in us and Moshe and Hannah—it's not just that they were tzaddikim. It's not what it was. But because they were tzaddikim They knew that there was nothing else that mattered. They knew that when it's Saturday night And I want to go out to town. And my father told me on Thursday that he would give me the car keys. On Saturday night, I went out with my friends. And then Saturday night, suddenly my dad tells me, "Hey, listen, I changed my mind." I'm not giving you the car. I know that my night is going to be ruined unless I use whatever argument I could possibly use in order to win my father over and get those keys. That's obvious to us But is it obvious to us that Hashem? Is the only one that matters. Not so much. Hashem's this idea Hashem's this concept Hashem's this fairy tale That we know in our minds exists, but it's not something we see as something we have to really attack And something we really have to work on and build a relationship with, trying our best to get him on our side.
And this idea is presented by Rabbi Nachman in an unbelievable way. Take a look And what he says in Siman Samahtes Zich Saran Zamru Le Mishem Enatzkin Oso Vesamech Sing out to the one. Who is overcome and is happy that he was overcome? Kitzri chinl nateach osol yizbar kviyachol says Rabbi Nachman. You need to defeat Hashem. You need to beat him, not beat him physically. To overcome him, to win him. Ki afal bishnin mila adam, because even though it seems to a person, Hashem is barach in a road to the car while Machmaschikil the harvey. Even if it seems to a person, Hashem has wants that nothing to do with you because you've done a lot of averus. And even now, you're not really being that great. A person has to strengthen himself and literally spread himself out before Hashem and raise his hands to God.
That he should have mercy on him, and bring him close. And he wrote to the Yosy Israeli. I want to be a Jew. I'm not going to let you say no. She wrote to the Naseach, 'It's Hashem's bark, kviachol, that a person who wants to defeat Hashem, Hashem is bark, yeshlo simchamiz, and Hashem is happy. Hashem wants us to go out there and argue with him. He wants us to go ahead and try to make a difference. To the yachol' And it continues in Ayin. I'll just read a little part of it. Does Hashem want? Is it okay for us to just sit there and let Hashem make decrees against us? Because at that time Rabbi Nachman was talking. There were terrible decrees from the Gaon against the Jewish people. Says Rabbi Nachman, we need to call to him from his dealings. When he's dealing with any decree I think similar to that, we need to call him away from that. That he should turn away from that and turn to us. Lemashanu rots and ladaverimo, because we want to talk to him, levakish mi menu, to request from him to bring us close.
And then he goes on to say that even if one Jew calls out to Hashem while he's making a decree, he turns away from that decree to hear what that Jew has to say. This sounds like a very bizarre concept Because this brings to the front. One of the most fundamental questions on tefillah Which is If Hashem knows what's best for me Why would I argue with Him? Fair question. If Hashem knows what's good for me Won't Hashem want to give that to me? Why do I have to argue with Him? Why should I fight? Why should I beg and plead and argue with Hashem if, at the end of the day, He knows what's best? Rabbi Sa'adi This is one of the most fundamental principles in Tefillah. And it's a hard thing to swallow. But you need to hear it. Sometimes Hashem will create challenges for us.
And sometimes He will withhold things that are meant to come to us In order so that we should be mespalta. And the reason Hashem does that is because the whole purpose of your life is to build a relationship with Him. And if we don't have needs There's no reason to reach out. What comes out is something crazy. If we are in a terrible situation and we don't call out to Hashem, and something negative happens It could be because that's what was meant to be. Or it could be because you didn't take the opportunity to fight for it. It's like the old story of the guy who's drowning And a helicopter comes and he says. I don't need you. I trust in God. And a boat comes. He says, "I don't need you. I trust in God." And then he goes underwater and he dies. And he goes up to heaven. And he says to Hashem, "Hashem, I had faith in you that you were going to save me."
And Hashem said, I did. I sent you a helicopter. I sent you a boat. It's the same idea. Hashem gives us challenges. We're put in situations. But Hashem wants us to grab onto that lifeline. What's that lifeline? That lifeline is tefillah. The Chazon Ish calls tefillah the ikur he shtadlus shalada. It's the main effort of a human being. More than work More than college, more than your boss. That's true. That's also a shtadlus. You need that too. But tefillah is a thing that can make a change, a thing that can make a difference. One of my goals in the She'er is to show you how. And why, how that works, how tefillah can actually change things, and how to daven in a certain way in order to make those changes. We'll talk about that later. But right now, you have to understand one thing: Hashem does not want to be your fairy tale godmother.
He doesn't want a theoretical relationship. He wants a real one. This is something that you do not learn in school. Because you're told the way you talk to Hashem is by reading a siddur, and you have this book And you read the right words, and you close it, and you move on with your day. Unfortunately The way we connect to the siddur today, that's how it is. That's not the way it's supposed to be. It's not at all what Chazal intended. Help to show you over the next several months what Chazal really intended. But in the meantime, we need to start from scratch. And we need to recognize. That if we are going to improve our tefillah We need to start by working on our relationship with Hashem and making it more real. If you do not work on your relationship with God If you do not try to make it real Then I can teach you the meaning of every single tefillah in the Siddur.
It's not going to make a difference. Because at the end of the day I can. Give you all the flowers in the world But if you don't love your wife and you don't want to have a relationship with your wife You don't want to work on that relationship to make it better. No roses are going to fix that relationship. The roses are a weapon that you have that needs to be accompanied by a real desire for a relationship. Why does Hashem want you to argue with him? Maybe Hashem should say, "What do you mean? Who are you to argue?" Because you know what Hashem wants He wants you to connect. He knows Like in Gemara The rabbi could just stand up there and he could tell you everything the Gemara says, and you could be done. What's kishmak about the Gemara when you're sitting there and you're trying to figure out and you're fighting with your harusa? That's what brings you close.
Hashem wants you to fight it. Obviously, knowing in the back of your head that the thing that you're asking for, if it's really Hashem's will That it doesn't come to you, then you don't want it. But Hashem wants you to be passionate. Maybe for us, not chutzpahdik But passionate about Him Passionate about what we're asking for. Because when we're passionate about what we're asking for, that means that He knows that to us, He's not the fairy tale godmother. He's real. And we see Him as something real in our life. One of the things I'm going to challenge you to do. Is I'm going to challenge you in your tefillah Maybe in your shemoneh esrei Or maybe for a few minutes during the day, sometime over the next week. To try to look at your davening To look at your conversation, five minutes that you're going to have before you go to sleep Or in the base mattress you're going to put your head down because you're taking a break from Gemara and talk to Hashem for a few minutes, but stop talking to Him as this angel in heaven that's watching over you.
Start talking to him like he's standing right next to you, and he can actually help you with things you need in your life. We all have things we're suffering from. We all have things we're struggling over. Why are we keeping it bottled up inside when we have someone right next to us that can help us? Right inside of us that can help us. You know why? Because we don't really believe that's true. That's the difference between us and the Chalim. But if we want our tefillah to improve We need to start working on that. Rebbe, say till tomorrow.
Is this shiur filed in the wrong place? Let us know.