Vayigash - The Secret of Exile

2:24 The Gemara in Baba Basra suggests, as many of you know, that it was Yochved, who was born beinah chomos. She was born between the borders of Canaan and Mitzrayim. So there's two questions over here. Question number one is, what's the idea that Yochved was born sort of between the borders? What does that mean? What is that teaching us? And the second one, I think, is that the Torah says that something is seventy So it means that there's the quality of seventy to it. In other words, every number in the Torah has a meaning. So if you see that something is four or seven or ten, all of those things are eight. All of those numbers indicate a particular meaning. Seventy has a particular meaning. If the Torah wanted to convey to us that it was sixty-nine people, the Torah would have said sixty-nine. The fact that Yochaveh was born beinah chamos and the Torah chooses to call that seventy, even though she's not counted within the number, means that Yochaveh, in a certain sense, obviously she's mina minyan, but she's. What makes it into seventy? The Torah puts the dageh, the emphasis, on the seventy. So the question is, what's the inner nature of the number seventy, and what does seventy have to do with going down to Mt. Sinai?

3:40 Does that make sense? Our two questions are: number one, what's the inner significance of the fact that Yochaveh was born in Benachemos, and number two, what's the relationship of seventy to going down to Mt. Sinai? Now we seventy a number of times in the Torah. One of the most famous times that we seventy is comes up on Purim a lot because we know that Nifnas Yain, Yatzasod So Yain is begematria seventy and Sod is begematria seventy. So any time you see the number seventy in the Torah, there's a certain revelation of a secret. So it must be as we're unpacking this together, it must be that if the Torah tells us that seventy people went down to Mitzrayim. That there's some sort of secret embedded in going down to Mitzrayim. In other words, there's a revelation of a secret that occurs within the gullus itself.

4:33 I want to make that a little bit more clear. Seventy is going down to the gullus. So it's not just within the gullus, but going down into gullus is the process of entering the secret and becoming part of the secret. Which means entering into the revelation of a secret, because once you know a secret, it's not a secret anymore. But you could know something that's a secret. So if somebody says to you "This is a secret," so it's not a secret to you, but it is a secret to everybody else. Which means that the process of Klal Yisrael going down into Mitzrayim is a secret. It's sort of like a secret that Klal Yisrael is being let into. It's like a whisper, so to speak, for Hakadosh Baruch Hu. I'm telling you this secret. Nobody else in the world understands this, but this is the secret that exists between Klali Yisrael and Hakadosh Baruch Hu. We see the number seventy in a number of places. We see first of all there's seventy nations of the world.

5:34 And we see that there's also seventy members of the Sanhedrin. So the idea of seventy, in a certain sense, has to do with the entire world. But it also has to do with a particular aspect of wisdom. The seventy members of the Sanhedrin means that within this secret we're talking about, there's a certain wisdom that's discovered within the seventy. So the seventy sages, the seventy chachamim that make up the Sanhedrin They are, so to speak, the holders of the wisdom of this secret. We haven't discussed what the secret is, but whatever it is, wherever you see the number seventy, it means. It's the wisdom that's embedded within that secret. Rabbi Nachman says, and this where it starts to get a little bit deep. This was four o'clock in the morning, and I was like, I think I understand this idea, but I'm not sure if I'm a hundred percent. But there's a big idea here.

6:28 We know that there's shivim panim l'tarah. What does it mean that there's shivim panim l'tarah? What does it mean that there's seventy approaches? Judaism is a seventy lane highway, so to speak. So within this wisdom that we're speaking about, of this secret, there are seventy different roads to take to get into this wisdom. What would be a good example of this? A good example of this might be, I don't know if any of you have ever been to therapy before. You don't have to raise your hand. You could just quietly like acknowledge it to yourself. But if you've ever been to therapy, sometimes you'll show up at a therapist's office. And the therapist will be like, "What do you want to talk about today?" And you'll be like, "I've got five things I want to talk about, but we only have forty-five minutes." And there's a line that therapists use, which I think is very beautiful.

7:19 Think of yourself as a mansion. Think of yourself as having many doors to that mansion. So it doesn't really matter which door you take. No matter which door you take, you end up in the mansion. Some doors are the doors to the kitchen. Some doors are the doors that go into the dining room, into the living room. But either way, it's all the same mansion that you walk into. So when we say there's seventy faces of the Torah, shivim panu laTorah That means there are seventy different entrance points into this wisdom of the Torah. But that part I think I understand well. Here's the part where it gets a little bit more hazy. In a certain sense, this means that every single Jew experiences a dimension of prophecy. Why is that? Because let's not think of prophecy for a moment as knowing the future. Let's think of prophecy for a minute as having such absolute clarity that the future becomes obvious.

8:22 You hear the difference? In other words In a certain sense, we're restricted by time. So in other words, I can only see so far because there's a certain amount of space that I can see and a certain amount of time I could see within. Of course, as you get a little bit older, your vision expands. So let's say, for example, you have a 16-year-old girl, and she's like, 'No, I'm for sure. I know for sure that if I do this, this is the way it's going to turn out.'

8:52 But then you get a little bit older, and you're like, 'It's for sure not going to turn out that way. It's going to turn out the exact opposite of what you think.' And I just want to point out because I do this for a living. I look at you for a living. You look at me, but I look at you for a living. So just now there were two very different reactions, or three reactions. There was people that had no reaction at all, and then there was the girls who were a little bit older that were like, 'Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry' Oh my goodness, yeah, I remember when I was a high school doofus, so I thought it was the way life worked. And then there were the parents, and you all like did this. You're like, it was like a look of like, like, grave disappointment. Like, oh my gosh, I can't believe you would say that.

9:24 Why don't they see? I grew up as a very ADHD kid. One of the things about ADHD children is that they don't know that their actions have consequences. My mother's refrain in my life was 'your actions have consequences.' I remember thinking no, but this time it's going to be different. I'm not, trust me, mom, I'm not going to get caught this time. And of course, I always got caught. I was like the world's worst. Some kids are really good at lying, and then some kids lie, but they're terrible at it. So I was trying to say that the only person that believed me was my mother. But the idea. Thank you very much for talking with me on that. I appreciate the idea. You get older and you have an expanded sense of wisdom. There's a certain prophecy-like quality to it. Does that make sense? In other words, you're able to see into the future a little bit more. You can see the consequences. You could see how things are developing.

10:19 Right now, we're living in a particularly—I don't know what word. I guess we could be honest. There's more than a little bit of fear in the air. I'm traveling now from Eretz Israel. I'm wondering what it's going to be like to walk in the streets with a yarmulke. What about walking through the airports? What do people think about this? I was much more confident six months ago walking through the airports than I am today. And there's a certain A certain wisdom right now of thinking about what was happening in the late 20s, early 30s in Germany What did it feel like? And we're sort of all wondering to ourselves, how do you read the tea leaves here? What's the wisdom of the future? A certain sense of prophecy. How do we expand our consciousness to be able to? And for those of you that just took a deep breath, I want you to know I'm taking a deep breath also.

11:14 Even being here, you should know there was a siren Friday night in my neighborhood. I'm six thousand, seven thousand miles away from my family. Motzei Shabbos, I'm on the phone messaging my wife, what happened? It's hard to be away. There's a certain wisdom that we're trying to predict the future now. So I mean, Abraham points out that when the pasuk says 'b'shivim nefesh,' I want to make sure I get this exactly right. When it says 'b'shivim nefesh yardu avosecha' That's Rashi Tevus Navi. That seventy souls went down to Mitsrayim."B'shivim nefesh yardu avosecha" is Rashi Tevus Navi. So the seventy souls going down to Mitsrayim, those seventy souls that will counteract the seventy nations of the world. These seventy souls that are entering into the wisdom of Galus, that are being told the secret of the Galus, it gives them a perspective on all of the future. You see how everything ties them together.

12:17 So I say it again, because I myself want to say, from for me, I want to say, even though some of you look like I think I lost you there. I'll say it for you, and I'll say it for me, but also for myself. There's a lot of noise in the text, but I'll make sure to clean it up. There's seventy nations of the world. The seventy souls that go down to Mitzrayim are connected. We balance out the seventy nations of the world. Seventy is the gematria of secret. Nishnasiai in Yatzasod. So does the gematria of seventy. We're entering into the secret of Gullus. Within seventy, there's a wisdom. The seventy Chachamim of the Sanhedrin. There's a wisdom that we need to learn. That's the Shvim Panim LaTorah. The seventy members of the Sanhedrin. But that wisdom gives us a glimpse into the future. It gives us a perspective of what's going to be. Did we do better? A little better. I even for myself, it was a little better. So I want to try to unpack this and explain as follows.

13:07 What is this wisdom? What is this wisdom that we're all trying to get to here? In the Bris Bein Habasarim Avraham Avinu was offered a choice. There are two options for your children, and remember that the breastman of Sarem is the. This is the covenant that's being made with Avram Avinu. It's an unexpected thing. If one makes a covenant with somebody, we don't expect to talk about terrible things that are going to happen. But Avram Avinu is given a choice, and the choice is Gehennom or Gehul. What do you want your children to endure? Okay, do you want your children to endure? Gehenna or gallus—it's embarrassing, but you could just go for it. Because anyway, they're talking about it, so you could just make a decision. That's that's a good decision, also. And Avram Avinu chooses gallus. The shali is what's Avram Avinu choosing over here? What's that choice of Gehenna or gallus?

14:05 The tzara shave—the connection between Gehenna and gallus—is as follows: both Gehenna and gallus are a process of refinement. I think people misunderstand Gehenna. Let's talk for a second about what Gehenna is, even though it's not the topic of our conversation. Gehenna is the process through which the soul reacclimates to the world of souls. All of our neshamos come from a place called Olam HaNeshamos. You've heard of this. There's a world called Olam HaNeshamos. That's where your soul returns to after you die. While the soul is in a body down here in this world, the soul becomes slowly acclimated to being in a body. And that's a very disorienting thing for a soul because a soul, in a certain sense, doesn't feel like it belongs in a body, at first. What can this be compared to? The best comparison is a diamond in a Tiffany's box in a Tiffany store, where the light is perfectly not a lab-grown diamond, like an actual diamond. Like we don't want to be too like.

15:12 You don't want to say it, but everyone wants a diamond. Nobody wants a lab-grown diamond, but you get the lab-grown diamond because it doesn't really make a difference. But let's say you have a perfect diamond in a Tiffany's box. I'm sorry that I touched too close to home for some of you. I'm okay with it. I think I'm okay with it. I'm probably not okay with it, but I don't want to say that I'm okay with it. You know what I'm saying? That whole game. I have this question now that I'm getting from Tommy and Rebby. She says she doesn't care, but I'm not sure if what she says is what she means. I'm like, welcome to marriage. This is just the beginning of not understanding the language of the other half of the species. And then, I did what you told me. I know I said that, but there was also a part of me that wanted to. Nobody knows what you're talking about. Or fifty percent of the species doesn't know what you're talking about. Your half understands it. A diamond in a Tiffany's box is very comfortable.

16:06 It makes sense to a diamond, so to speak, is in the Tiffany's box, right? But a diamond is not meant to be in a Tiffany's box. Where's a diamond meant to be? A diamond is meant to be on a hand. But there's a process that a diamond has to go through to understand that it makes more sense to be on a hand than it does to be in a box. What's the difference? The difference is as follows. In a box, the diamond's beauty is reflected perfectly. On a hand The diamond. Is not reflect its beauty is not reflected perfectly, but it reflects the beauty of the person perfectly. Do you hear the difference? Does that make sense? In other words, when you give a beautiful piece of jewelry to somebody, the jewelry is actually diminished, and the person is enhanced. So the question is, how do you see? How does the soul see itself? When the soul comes down into this world, the soul says, "I don't belong here because my beauty has been diminished."

17:05 But what does the soul learn? The soul learns my beauty might be diminished, but my purpose is enhanced because now I'm in a body, animating a body, doing a mitzvah that I couldn't possibly do as long as I was in the Olam Anishanos. So far, so good. The problem is that the soul becomes acclimated to being in a body. So the soul gets used to things that are not soulful things. For example, in the beginning of the soul's life If somebody would come, that's wonderful. I was hoping we would have a baby come for sure. This is the baby's first year. How old is the baby? Actually, six weeks on Tuesday. So this is mamish for this baby. When the soul of that baby comes down into this world And somebody knocks on the door and says Can I have money because I have nothing to eat?

18:00 What's the natural reaction of the soul? You want to eat. That's not a soulful thing to do. The soul doesn't understand the concept of being down in the coarse physical world. Of course, what the soul learns from the world is that there's more godliness in the world than there is in the Olam Anishamus. Because the infinity of God is best reflected in where, not in the spiritual worlds. That's where God is obvious. The infinity of God is best expressed in the physical world, where God's presence is not obvious. I'll explain to you in relationship terms. How do you know when you really love your husband when things are going well? When you're dating, you have no idea if you really love him. That's just cute. That's like both of you putting on a good act, right? And you love him in the beginning of marriage. The beginning of marriage is like playing house, right? Then you have a kid, and you're like, okay, we have a cute baby now, right?

18:59 Talk to me when you have five kids and you're outnumbered and you haven't slept in years. You're snapping at each other and there's pressure. Things have become distant, communication becomes harder, and the only thing that you talk about is the kids and the challenges that they have. You start to forget at some point how we got together to begin with. I sometimes look at my life and go, how did I get here? I was 18 years old and I think I was a cool kid, and now I'm overweight with a beard in Los Angeles doing this year. It doesn't exactly make sense. You'll have this. You're younger, but I'm telling you, you'll come with me on this. You turn around a little too close to the home fence. The Tom Jones. The idea that you become acclimated to a world that's not your own, and you somehow remain loyal to each other—that's real love. So the infinity of Achod Shvarhu is expressed not in the spiritual worlds. That's not impressive.

19:56 When a person can find godliness in the coarse physical world, that's impressive. A couple that stays married for thirty, forty, fifty years, through all the good times and the bad times and the really bad times, the couple that continues to make the choice to stay with each other even under really difficult circumstances—that reflects the love that the couple really has for each other. The soul comes down into this world, and it realizes that there's more infinity in this world. That's kind of more infinity, but there's a greater expression of godliness in this world than there is in the spiritual worlds. Of course, the challenge is that the soul has spent a lot of time down here in the physical world, so there's a process called Gehennom, where the soul has shaved away, so to speak, its coarse physicality that's become accustomed to. Gehennom is not a bad thing.

20:49 If you think about it, for example, you put a shirt in the wash, right? Let's say that shirt could walk or experience things. If you put a shirt in the wash, what are you really saying? You're saying it's a good shirt. It just needs to be cleaned a little bit. It got a stain. It needs to go through this uncomfortable process of returning to its pristine self. Gehenna is not a bad thing. I remember years ago when I was 18 years old, I went to the Mishkiyah Rabbi Yeshiva, and I said, "I'm definitely going to gehenna." It's like one of those wake up eighteen year old moments where I'm in big trouble, I was bad for the last four years. And you're having that January time type of conversation you have with a teacher and a seminar. I think I'm going to get Hanim, and I remember Meshkial goes, me too.

21:36 So he's like, we'll be there together, we'll hang out. I was like, what are you talking about? Hanim is a bad thing. He's like, well, it's a painful thing. It's a painful experience. But unless you're a tremendous tzaddik whose soul never became acclimated to the world, everyone goes through Gehenna because it's what allows us to understand the concept of the world of the Olam HaNeshamos. It's the refinement. It cuts away from the physicality of life so that you can't return to the same place. It cuts away from the physicality of life so that you can return to factory settings and once again be comfortable within the Olam HaNeshamas, where you can then attain the first part of the star. Okay, ultimately, going to be a Olam Habab, but there's a certain delight, a certain pleasure that the soul gets from being back in Shamayim. It's the pleasure of the diamond being in the Tiffany's box. That was one choice for Avram Avinu. In other words The Bris Ban Abasaram begins with Hakadosh Baruch Hu telling Klal Yisrael, telling Avram Avinu, your children must be involved in the physical world. That's the job of the Jew.

22:35 The Medrashim parshas Naso says Nesave Hakadosh Baruch Hu lios loios Baruch Dir b'Tachtayim. What does Hakadosh Baruch Hu desire? A dwelling place in the world down below. Where is the mission statement of a Jew? The world down below. To be a Jew means you have to be involved in the world. If a Jew removes themselves from the world, that's not being very Jewish. We don't believe in conversational fillers. We don't believe in going to a mountaintop and just meditating and deep breathing. I know there's a lot of that going on in the world today. It's like these deep breathing exercises, and we're going to attain some sort of metamorphosis. It's much more impressive to give an onion a dollar on the street than it is to sit there doing deep breathing yoga techniques. I get it, and I'm all in on mindfulness, and that's what gets you to a place of serenity.

23:22 So that you could serve God. That's beautiful. But we are a religion that says you have to get involved in the physical things of this world. Every single thing in Judaism involves the physical world. We make kiddush over wine, we make brachos over food. Every single thing we do involves the physical world. We put mezuzas on our house, we put tefillin on our arms. There's nothing wrong with being Jewish. We're not like Muslims and Christians. Or there's some kind of thing that you want to get out of Shamayim. Remember that the soul recognizes that coming down here is the ultimate destination, which is why the Ramban writes that Olam Haba is down here in this world. Olam Hazeh is the world as it currently is. Olam Haba is the world as it will one day be. So we're not a religion that's eschewing the physicality of the world. The exact opposite. The destination of Judaism is down here in this world. But if we're down here in this world, naturally we're going to become physical.

24:18 And if we become physical, then our soul needs a refinement. Option number one that Avram rejects is Gehenna. Because what we want is for the soul to remain godly. But Avram Haim who says no, Gehenna is not a good choice. We'll take Gullus. Let's just say, I think it's better to have a more balanced approach. Gullus has been pretty long Gehenna is eleven months max. Gullus has been for several thousand years. Two hundred ten years of Mitzrayim was cut short. And because it was cut short, that's a deep Torah for a different time. That's why Moshe Rabenu wanted Rav Akiva to be the one to take us out of Mitzrayim, because since Rav Akiva had reached the fiftieth level of Bina, Rav Akiva was capable of taking us out of the fiftieth level of Tumah. Moshe, I think you're right. Moshe Rabbi only reached the forty ninth level of Bina, so Moshe Rabenu was only capable of pulling us out of the forty ninth level of tummah. So Moshe said, 'Moshe Rabenu, the Maggid says, went to Hakadosh Baruch Hu and said, "Have Rav Akiva take them out of the Mitzrayim, because this way we could have done. Our four hundred years, we would have reached the fiftieth level of tummah."

25:14 We would have become the most physical, and Ruvakiva would have been able to take us out. Moshe Rabbeinu said, "I can only take them out of the forty ninth level." Mainly, we were cut short at two hundred and ten years. The remaining hundred and ninety years of Gallas Mitzrayim have been spread out over the last several thousand years. What we're experiencing today is actually the remnants of Gallas Mitzvot. Everything that we're experiencing now is those last hundred and ninety years. But because The Auschwitz trial was so intense. The Holocaust was a day in the park relative to Mitzrayim. If you read any of the midrashim of what was going on in Mitzrayim, it's wild. I highly recommend. Everyone has these fancy haggadas today. I highly recommend. There's a beautiful haggadah that I think was illustrated by a vichate. Is that not amazing? It's horrible, right? Yeah.

26:04 You don't want to show that to your little right. You want it, but you need to answer a specific question. The sentence trails off or ends with a function word. You want to see it at some point in your life because it's really graphic. What is it? It's a Baruch Teitz Haggadah. It's an illustrated Haggadah, but it really brings it to life. It's like it's horrifying in a certain way. But that's what it was every day. Every day, like we had, for example, not to compare to anything else, and obviously October seventh was the greatest tragedy. Simchas Torah was the greatest tragedy in a single day since the Holocaust. But the amount of Jews—if you do the math—the amount of Jews that died on Simchas Torah was half of an average day during the Holocaust. And if you think about the worst day of the Holocaust That's a walk in the park relative to Metzrayim.

26:50 So Akel Shemar, who said, "we're going to take these 190 years, we're going to spread it out over a course of several thousand years, and four iterations of four different calendars." Why in the world would Avraham Avinu choose that? I personally much rather go through Gehenna. Then go through a Holocaust, the Crusades Pogroms. We're coming up on Christmas And for those, I think some of you may have heard a shiur about Christmas from the beginning. If you study the origins of Christmas, the horrific day for a Kallah circle, historically speaking, it's like before I knew about it. I remember that I took my wife on a date to the Bronx Zoo. In December time, because they light up the Bronx Zoo with like tremendous Christmas lights, and it's very beautiful. And it was like a shiva should date back in the day. It was like a known thing. Like oh, you'll go to the Bronx Zoo in December. First of all, that's a terrible idea. It's freezing cold outside. Walking through the Bronx Zoo at night, totally somebody should run that date. It's totally not a move. I thought I was like so smooth. I was like I'll be so good. I'll take her to the Bronx Zoo. It was freezing.

27:51 And you're looking at these Christmas lights, and then you get older, and you're like, 'Oh, that's not good. It's not like that's the thing I should be looking at.' But to think about that—Avraham Avinu had the opportunity to choose Gehenna, and he chose Galus. What in the world is that? So the idea of Galus is as follows: Galus is a different type of refinement than the refinement of Gehinnom Because the refinement of Gehenna is passive And the refinement of the text is active. So in Gehenna you're not actually doing anything. In Gehenna the soul goes through a process where it is cleansed; it has its worldliness and physicality removed from it. But you're not actually a participant in it. Masha'ine Kanan Galus. When a person goes down into Galus, the secret of Galus, and this the whole idea of seventy Is Taira discovered within Galus. So if you think about it, for example, let's take a look at Galus 1: 3, right? So the Avodah followed Kol Torah Kula. The Gemara says before the giving of the Torah

28:59 But the Medrash says that it was only like a smell. It only had like the reyach. It didn't. It wasn't the physical mitzvah that we have today. Something changed by Har Sinai. The mitzvot took on physical form. The Avos kept the Torah, but not necessarily in a physical way. They kept the ideas. They were tapped in. The spirituality of a mitzvah. When did the mitzvah come into its full richness? That only happened by Har Sinai. In order to get to Har Sinai, you need to go through Golus Mitzrayim. Right. So there's If you want to be a little Kabbalistic about it, when Hakadosh Baruch Hu created the world, He created the world with ten utterances. By the marvel, those ten utterances were broken. They fell into Mitzrayim. Hashgacha made Klal Yisrael go down to Mitzrayim to gather those ten utterances. Those ten utterances, the Maral says, were rectified during the ten Makos, and ultimately were rebuilt in the form of the Aseret Hadibros that we received at Sinai.

29:58 So we went from the very beginning of creation to the Torah. The Torah is something that's revealed from within Gollis. In other words, a Jew who goes down into exile discovers the Torah within the exile. Discovers the seventy Chachamim of the Sanhedrin. Discovers the shivim panim laTorah. Discovers a world view and a perspective of nevuah. Why is Torah only discovered from within galus? We alluded to it before, but I'm going to try to spell it out a little bit more clearly now. There's a certain. There's a little bit of a sophisticated idea. You can come with me on this. I know it's like Sunday afternoon, but we could try for something a little bit deep. That I feel very validated right now. I appreciate you holding space for me in this way, in this time. So it goes something like this: the world The physical world proclaims its own existence.

31:01 It says, "I exist, and there is no God." That's what the physical world proclaims. When you look at this table, you don't see anything godly about the table. If you see a river and the river is going downstream, why is the river going downstream? Because gravity. That's the nature of the way a river operates. Even though you'll see a tremendous amount of plan and purpose within the world We don't know exactly why the plan and purpose is the way it is A person could say logically, I can see that this world has a designer. I think it's very clear, right? And so a person could say, there's a design, then there's a designer. But we have no idea from the design itself that there's a God, because the nature of the design is that it hides God.

31:48 So the word 'olam' means hell; 'olam' means hidden. So I think that's a good idea. In other words, it's very popular today to be like, 'There's a proof of God because wherever there's a design, there's a designer.' But if you think deeply, really, it's the exact opposite. The nature of the design of this world, and this is what science is doing today, even though this is very misguided. What science is basically trying to do is to limit the entire world into something that's understandable, and they're doing an amazing job. They've gotten very, very close to the beginning right now. They're stuck at that final point. How did this all start? Well, I think it started with the Big Bang. But up until that, everything in the known universe right now is explainable, and we're explaining on levels that it's never been explained before. If you listen to the atheists of today, they're saying the only things that we can't explain are the things that we haven't yet explained, but soon we'll be able to explain everything. They're trying to take everything and make it into the known.

32:38 So the nature of the world is that it hides God. So here's the big secret: Why does it do that? Why does it do that? So the Alter Rebbe said as follows, and this is such a world-changing idea; it's mind-boggling. There's only one thing in existence that truly exists, and that's Hashem Himself. So the world, which is the creation of God Bears the mark of its Maker. I'll say it again. This is a very deep idea. Why does the world proclaim its own existence? Why does it say I exist independently? Because there's only one existence that actually exists independently, and that's God. So when God creates something, the thing that He creates bears His mark. And what is the mark of God? The mark of God is I exist independently of anything else. So naturally, the thing that God creates will do what? It will do exactly what its maker does. So the world itself says,"I exist independently from anything else.

33:45 So the arrogance of the world is really a reflection of what? It's a devi. Right, it's not a perfect alignment, right? So that's why it's wrong. But why is the world so arrogant? Why does the world say, 'I proclaim my own existence'? Because that's what its maker did. Does that make sense? So the secret of Gollas is as follows, and this is all I have time for. If you look at the world and see it for what it appears to be Then you cannot see God. It's possible to not see God. It's possible to look at the physical world and say, for example, 'I don't see any evidence of a divine presence,' right? Because that's the nature of the world. The secret of Gollas is that the deeper you get into the physicality of the world, the more you understand it. The more you realize that the lack of godliness is the greatest expression of godliness.

34:37 Did you hear? I feel like only thirty percent of you got it. You got it for sure. You were definitely locked in. I want to say that again, right? Okay, so I want to make sure you were like, you were. It was. I want you to know it was very helpful to me. There's always that person in the audience that's going like this. I'm like, okay, that's awesome. Yeah, one person got it right, and then I always kind of like, you start like, okay, so from her thirty percent, right? That's the basically what I did. I'll say it one more time. It's a very sophisticated idea. The deeper you get into something, the more you understand it for its true nature. I know how to explain this. I know how to explain this. This is a great one. I'm sure none of you have ever spoken to a guy, but if you have Some of you have spoken to guys, obviously, but for the remainder of you, right? You know how like a guy. I shouldn't say this. It's not nice to say this way, but I'm just going to say this way. A guy could be good looking until he opens his mouth.

35:27 Thank you for coming with me. You know Like, like this, like a guy. He's like a good-looking guy, and then like he opens up. He's like, bro, I was good. You know Why is that? There's a certain arrogance. Once it's expressed, it's deeply uncomfortable to be around, right? It's like there's no space for you. There's no place where I could be with you, like that. It's deeply uncomfortable. But let's say for whatever reason you decided to stay within that relationship. What happens the deeper you get into a relationship? What happens to that arrogance? You realize it's not arrogance at all. What is it really? Insecurity. Insecurity, right? And the greater the arrogance The greater the insecurity. So you have this guy. Make up a story about him, right? And he's like this ripped gym rat, and he's wealthy, driving the biggest Escalator, let's say a red Ford Mustang.

36:30 And really you know that the greater the arrogance, the greater the insecurity. So you have this huge hulking man who's a terrified little child. That's what he is, right? And in a certain perverse way, the deeper you get into the relationship, the more you don't even see the arrogance. All you see is the insecurity. And so what happens is that some people are looking from the outside going, I don't understand how she's dating that guy, isn't he so arrogant? You speak to that girl and you go, he's not arrogant at all. He's a tiny little baby. He was crying to me just the other night. It's like, no, that guy doesn't cry. He doesn't cry to you. But for me, where I was able to see his vulnerability, I see him for what he actually is. So the way it works is as follows: the biggest sadikim in the world are those that are most deeply embedded within the physicality of the world. Moshe Abinu was very wealthy. Moshe Rabbeinu was very wealthy. Rav Yudan Nasi was very wealthy. What does that mean? That they were wealthy, physically, very wealthy.

37:24 Once they got in touch with the physicality of the world, once they realized what it truly was, they were no longer scared by it because they understood that the arrogance of the world to say that I exist independent from God was the most godly thing that the world could say. And once the tzaddikim come to the world and they say, and I mean when I say the world, I mean all of us. Once they come to us and say this thing that you have that you think is really the opposite of godliness is really your most godly part, then massive changes start to take place. So going back to our macho about this guy, once that guy realizes that all his macho stuff is really just insecurity, what happens to the macho stuff? So it starts to dissipate, right? Because he realizes, it's just insecurity. And what would happen if I actually fed that insecurity? Fed it. Nourish it. I don't mean like fed it, like continue with the insecurity. What would happen if you actually healed that insecure part?

38:19 Right. So now a person, let's say this the same kid who was like bullied as a kid, right? And you start to go, I'm not defined by the fact that I was bullied as a kid. And I'm just, I was a normal human being going through something, and I chose to deal with it in this way. It starts to become human to him and understandable to him, so then massive changes start to take place. So the biggest tzaddikim go deeply into the physical world, into the exiled nature of the world. We'll explain what that means in a second, and they start to tell the world, this thing that you hate about yourself is really the greatest expression of godliness. Let's say an alcoholic. You know why an alcoholic drinks the way they do? You know what twelve steps says? Because they're the most spiritual people. They're yearning for spirituality, and they don't know how to get it, so they fill it up with drugs and alcohol and all of those things. That's why we know that alcoholics who are in recovery are some of the most amazing people I've ever met. If you've ever met somebody who's truly in recovery, I'm talking about people that have been in recovery for ten, twenty, thirty years. These people are mind-bogglingly impressive because they were able to discover within the exiled part of themselves that pure godliness that was within. So it's a massive transformation that takes place.

39:32 What is exile? What's the transformation? The Alter Rebbe says in Tanya, and this is again a mind-boggling idea. The definition of exile is the lack of belonging. That's what exile is. Take a second and think about it. You know, I think you'll see it will resonate very deeply. Every one of us has a part of us. I'll say it out loud, but I know I can say this with all confidence that every one of us is experiencing something like this. If you dig down, for every one of us, and you find and you go into all of our insecurities. We don't say that line, but whatever insecurity you have about yourself At the bottom of that is a sense of unworthiness. It's like, am I really worthy? Who amongst us can say that we're really worthy? We all have our different things, our inner negative beliefs about ourselves that say, I'm not worthy of love and connection, which is a fancy way of saying none of us feel a deep sense of belonging.

40:27 By the way, when you meet people who have a deep sense of belonging, who have gone through the exile to discover the belonging that exists within the lack of belonging, those people are amazing people to be around. I have a friend who lives in Cleveland. He has the most belonging of anyone I've ever met. He's totally comfortable with himself. It's like being around him is a nuclear reactor of love and connection because he's so deeply comfortable with himself. Actually, I saw him parenting his child last year. He was in the kid's school and I was in the kid's school together. The kid was cutting davening. He said to his son, 'He's like, where you supposed to be right now?' He goes, "I'm supposed to be in davening, but I really can't sit still right now, so I'm choosing not to be in davening." And he's like, "He goes, wait. And I was like, 'You're not going to tell him to go back to davening?' He goes, 'No, he knows that he's supposed to be in davening' And he's going to live with the consequences of that. Whatever happens, he's going to be okay.

41:20 And I'm going to be there for him if he needs. I would tell my kid to get back to Davening. But then, I spent a lot of time thinking about this interaction. I was like, 'Whose stuff is that? That's my stuff. That's my own ego saying, 'I need you to go back to Davening.' Because that kid needed not to be in Davening at that moment. And the father has such a deep sense of belonging within himself that he's transmitting to his son, 'It's okay to be where you are,' which is a very profound thing to do. And it takes a lot of work on oneself to have that reaction instantaneously. And he's an amazing person. But you only discover that belonging within the lack of belonging. You have to remove any fragments that end with function words, like 'right?' or 'you know.' You have to be willing to dive into the exile of I feel a deep sense of unworthiness to discover the worthiness that's embedded within the unworthiness. For example, a person believes that because I did an avera, I'm no longer worthy of God's love. And then they counter that at some point in their life with the Gemara that says Afal Pisha Chato Yisroel.

42:16 That even though I did that avera, I'm still a Jew and I'm still infinitely connected to God. So there's a sense of belonging that exists within the lack of belonging, and this is what Avraham Avinu chose for us. Avraham Avinu said, "I'd rather have the rectification, though it's much longer and much more painful, but it's active" Of the discovery of self Not the soul being cleansed by God, but the soul's discovery of its own essence from within the lack of belonging that exists within this world. Going down into the places that are the exact opposite of godliness to discover the godliness that exists within the lack of godliness, recognizing that everything that we are bears the mark of our maker. That's the secret of G-dless. That's the clarity of G-dless. If a person knew this, think about what type of perspective they would have. Think about the nevuah that a person would have.

43:13 Like a parent. What type of perspective would you have if you knew? That your child needs to go through the gullus of life, which every one of us does. How would you, as a parent, watch that play out? Because I'll share with you for those that are not parents, this is the way it goes. What you'll initially want is to fix your child's problems. That's your initial reaction. So let's take a classic example: your ninth grade daughter, who was popular in elementary school. Comes home and she's bawling, crying. She goes into her room, closes the door, and doesn't want to talk. And let's say you're a good dad or you're a good mom. You gently knock on the door, and you sit on the bed, and you don't say a word, and you're just rubbing your daughter's back, and you go, "I'm here if you want to talk."

44:00 You just stay there for like five minutes. That's the way it goes. With us, it takes like five minutes, but you have to be willing to sit through the five minutes of uncomfortable silence. Then after five minutes, the kid makes a choice, and what's the choice? The choice is to talk. And this is what it sounds like. I had a lot of friends in elementary school, but now in ninth grade, do you remember this? In ninth grade, I all split off And you have that existential crisis of who are my friends Because we were friends, but very dramatic. Boys don't have any of this. Boys just punch each other. It's a beautiful thing. You know exactly where you stand, right? And it's like in ninth grade, it's like I was friends with those girls, but then I tried to be friends with these girls, but it didn't work out, and now the other group doesn't want to take me back, so I'm in no man's land now. You remember that? It's very painful to watch.

44:48 As a father, there's one girl who's excluding me from the group. And that whole ninth grade female, I'm gonna bully you into an eating disorder type of reality. I'm only partially joking, but it's really sad what happens. As a father, you know what you want to do. I'll tell you as a dad. I can't speak for a mom, but I'm not sure if that's the case. Wait, no, I can't speak as a mom, but I'll tell you as a dad. You know what you want to do? You want to pull up the parents of that child and say, 'You have a choice. I could murder your child, or your child could be back at school.' Allow my daughter to go back to school. But of course, if you do that, what are you doing? You're robbing your child of the opportunity to discover the self within the lack of belonging. So you make the very painful choice to go. You're going to be okay. I don't know how this is going to play out, but I just want you to know as you journey through this I'll be here next to you. It's the only thing you could say as a parent.

45:39 Now, it'd be much easier to do the social engineering. It's much easier to call the parent of that child and say, "Please speak to your daughter to not be a terrible human being as she's going through this process." But if you do that, you're cutting off your child's legs. This was Avraham Avinu's choice. Right? It's passive. You don't have to do anything. You're cleansed of the physicality of the world. You live in a state of pristine godliness Or you could discover godliness. That's a pretty good choice. Thousands of years of terrible pain, of lack of belonging, of pogroms and crusades and Holocaust and the like. But within all of that, we discover all the truths that Claudia Searl has learned over the last several thousand years. What are those truths? Number one, we only have each other. That's a truth that for our generation, you're learning now firsthand. All the quiet anti-Semitism of the last thirty years. All of a sudden, it's like globalized the intifada.

46:40 We learned that no matter where we are, nobody could rob us of the things that we have inside of ourselves. You could put us in a concentration camp, but we'll still smuggle in our tefillin if we can, and we'll still strip away whatever clothing we have and light it on Hanukkah to make a menorah. We've learned things about ourselves that we never would have been able to discover had we not gone through the pain of history. But here's the last bit, and we'll have to finish with this. You can only discover the belonging that exists within the lack of belonging as long as you don't over identify with the lack of belonging. So there's a process in psychology called 'unblinking'. Have you heard of that term before? Unblending means that, for example, you start to over-identify with a part of yourself. So let's say, for example. A guy will say, "No, Rabbi, I am a bad person. I don't daven. I haven't davened for a long time."

47:43 " And it's like, "No, you're not the. You're not your action. You have to unblend from your action. You are a pure soul. A lokeinu shomeshalas not to be tahoriyah. There was a part of you that didn't act in the highest possible way But a person has to unblend from their lowest self in order to be who they are. Does that make sense? The process of unblending means If you go into exile and you say I am my exile, then the show is over. That's it. It's the end of the line. Because if you're not going to be able to leave, you can't possibly leave. But if you unblend from the exile and you say I am not my lowest moment, now you have the capacity to leave the exile. Because I'm not the lack of belonging. I am a person who deeply belongs, but I have a part of me that felt like I don't belong for so long.

48:34 Does that make sense? So go back to Yochved. So who is the seventieth one? Who's the one that completes the secret? It's Yochved, who's neither here nor there. She's not born within the Galus. She's not born within Mitzrayim. She's deeply connected to life before exile because that's where she was conceived. But she's born beinah homus So she lives in two worlds. She has a part of her that's within the exile, but a part of her that was never touched by the exile. So the secret of Gullis can only be discovered as long as you don't over-identify with the exile. That's what's happening in therapy today. Everybody who's going to therapy is going to learn one thing: the part of you that you're dealing with is just a part of you.

49:20 That's 99% of the work. A person says, "I am O. C. D." No, you're not O. C. D. You have a part of you that's O. C. D. You are not your O C B. You are not your anxiety. You are not your depression. That's ninety nine percent of the work. Once you've unblended from that part, I can learn what it's trying to do for me. I can learn how it's trying to protect me. I can work with it because it's just a part of me. In fact, I might even grow to appreciate that part. I'm not saying there's not a lot of work there, but so much of the work is just to stop identifying by your lowest moment. A person can't go into exile if they think I am my exile. The final stage of going to the exile is the message of Yochaveh. You're not the exile, which is of course Who are Yochaveh's children? It's it's it's Miriam, it's Aaron, and it's Moshe. Amen.

50:07 Of course, the redemption comes from the same place. The redemption comes from Yochaveh, because Yochaveh was never really a full participant in the exile to begin with, and that's what we're dealing with today. In the final moments before the Mashiach arrives. Everybody is in the process of clarifying for themselves. So who am I? That's the question, right? It wasn't eighty years ago. People were like Jews were going off the derek. Maybe I should be a communist. In at least in my chenut career, I've not yet met the kid that's going like Rebi. Maybe I should be a communist. I don't know if I have to be like an Orthodox Jew and put on tefillah. I really am into communism. I haven't met that kid yet. Why not? Because that's not the avoda of this generation. It was the avoda of eighty years ago. There was an intellectualism. How can I rectify the world? Today kids aren't worrying about rectifying the world. Kids are like, 'Maybe I'm addicted to Netflix.' No, but look at my screen time. What's being referred to as Moshechi? What's that whole movement that I need to watch YouTube for seven, eight hours a day? What's that? What's that move of me being on YouTube Shorts for three and a half hours?

51:07 What's that move of I'm going to watch Netflix and minimize the screen while I'm scrolling on Instagram and Twitter? What is that? What's that loss? It's a loss of consciousness. It's a loss of being. I can't be with myself. I don't know how to be with myself. The reason I don't know how to be with myself is because I'm so deeply embedded within this exile that I can't pay attention to the pain that I'm going through. That every one of us is going through. So the answer is to start to adopt the yochved type of personality. It's not an accident that every single redemption that's occurred throughout history was beskos nashim sedkamios. It always came from the women. It didn't come from the men. The reason that it came from the women is because there's a feminine movement of nurturing that exists within ourselves of being able to unblend from these parts and recognize who we truly are. I've owed in these final moments for Mashiach And especially now Especially now, as we're being once again pushed into this corner of a lack of belonging.

52:04 Am I allowed to be here in Los Angeles? Will I be attacked for being in Los Angeles? If I walk down the street, will somebody scream 'Free Palestine' at me? Globalize the Intifada? What are we going to experience? What does it feel like? If we actually paid attention to the feelings, what does it feel like personally for me? Sleeping in my bedroom for the first four weeks of the war, and that every single night I felt the vibrations of not tens, not fifty, but hundreds and hundreds of booms every single night as I heard the iron dome going off, hundreds every single night. We don't want to pay attention to those feelings because they're deeply uncomfortable. But the real feeling is, and this Sonny Perlman spoke about this on his Meaningful Minute podcast that he did. Sonny's an old friend of mine. We go back a million years. He said trauma is the feeling of being unloved.

52:53 Right? How many of us today are willing to pay attention to the fact that all of us on some level feel deeply unloved? None of us want to say it, but does the world acknowledge our right to exist? It's not about Israel. We know it's not about Israel. Because if I'm walking down the streets of Pico Robertson and somebody goes, 'Globalize the Intifada,' I'm just here right now. I'm just a Jew wearing a yarmulke. Why are you screaming at me? The answer is because there's a deep lack of belonging that we're all experiencing. But within that lack of belonging, what's the opportunity? The opportunity is to clarify who we truly are for our kedushmah. And in that sustr, we should be zeicher to greet v'shiach tzedekino. It's coming soon. Going back to the Avraham choice. Did he was it part of the choice that if we go through Gulas, then we would also have to go through Gehenna as well? Meaning we don't have to go through Gehenna in the way that it was originally structured. In other words, obviously a body still exists in this world, and the soul will have to go through a level of Gehenna. But the point of creation now is not to go through Gehenna. The point of creation is the active discovery of self.

54:02 Connecting from Hashem. From within ourselves, a choice that we make, a decision that we make, as opposed to a decision that's sort of given to us from above, like I'm pulling you in. It's like imagine if you have an intervention and you go to a friend and you go, you need to go to rehab because you're very messed up So that person might go to rehab and it might work, but that was sort of from top down, as opposed to the person who hits rock bottom and says I need to go to rehab. That process in rehab is going to be a very different process, precisely because they chose it from within themselves. But then, why is Gehenna like this thing that is? It seems like we're being punished. And I think when you don't do this, it's a very natural way of understanding Gehenna. A more profound, adult way of understanding Gehenna is not so much a punishment, but rather the natural consequence of leading a deeply physical life.

54:57 So Moshe Rabbeinu, for example, the Gemara says. That normally the soul leaving a body is like pulling a feather out of tar, right? And a white feather out of tar. First of all, it's it's uncomfortable to extract because the tar holds onto it, and also the residue of the tar is on the feather, right? Whereas Moshe Rabbeinu, because his body was so purified, because he at that point had reached such a level of shleimus, so it was like pulling a feather from milk. In fact, the soul of Moshe Rabbeinu, the Gemara says. Saw no reason to leave, even when the Malchamavah said,"There's a place for you under the Kisei Hakabod. Moshe Abinu Sol said, "There's no difference between this body and the Kisei Hakodosh. Okay, so for that level of tzaddik, there's no need for Gehenna. For people like me, there's a deep need for Gehenna because we're physical people and we exist within the physical world.

55:45 Go ahead. So I have a couple. What a beautiful interaction. I have a couple questions. Sure. Chose Gullah, with an understanding that whether it was Mitzrayim, where we lost four fifths of the people And then two thousand years of Gullahs Where we're so many hidden. Then now So the pain of that Gullahs, like each one of us is going through Gullahs, but the Gullahs have no their. They never got it, and they never bought in. And of course, we all have enough. So that's one question. The other question is, as a parent So I see the one with the ninth grader totally get it. So as a parent, second part though is If you don't speak to the parents of this young woman. She will then be. Eighteen, twenty-four, thirty-four. Unless she goes for therapy. If someone doesn't tell these parents, your daughter has a problem. Besides, my whatever is affecting my daughter, which she has to go through.

57:09 Because unfortunately, I've seen this where then you see this young man, young woman who is a mess with a horrible marriage. Because they never got the help at fourteen with whatever they're doing, manipulation bullying. So whose job is it? Of course, your daughter, your son has to go through whatever they're going through. But who's going to help this young woman, this young man? Beautiful question. If you don't help them, they're going to be a mess for years. So I can only attempt to answer both of those questions, and both of those are very profound questions. The first thing I would say is it's true that four fifths of Mitzrayim was left behind, but we know that in Yomos Mashiach it'll be different, because we're living in a post-Tarsini world where Hakadosh Baruch Hu chose us. And since Hakadosh Baruch Hu chose us, He chose us for no reason And if you choose something beyond reason, then there's no reason not to choose. The difference between the gullis of Mitzrayim, where four fifths were left behind, and Mashiach is that nobody will be left behind.

58:17 Now you'll say that. And if you're saying throughout history, but there have been so many Jews that were so to speak left behind. So I would only say, and maybe this is not a satisfactory answer, but maybe let it sink in. If we look at it through the lens not of that one soul in that particular time, but as part of this macro organism that is Klal Yisrael, we're all coming back. We're all on a process of tshuva. As for your second question, I'm only referring to the process of letting a daughter discover her own path. Of course, I might have a responsibility to say to another parent, "I'm not saying this to solve my kid's problems, and my kid's going to be okay." But as a friend, we live in the same community. I want to share with you what's happening, so you'll have the opportunity to educate your own daughter. And if I don't feel that I could do that as a parent, it might be of service to go to the school and have the school intervene. Was not to take responsibility for that kid. Of course, we have a responsibility to both the bullied and the bully. And what we know today is that the bully is in a tremendous amount of pain. The bully might have behaved that way because they were in pain also, and that pain deserves to be seen.