Parshas Yisro - Rational vs Suprarational Education

2:28 Because a parah aduma, not thirteen. So that's an excellent guess. It says a lot about the way you think about the boys. So it's a machlokas. Rav Eliezer says that a parah aduma needs to be two years old. And the Chachamim say that the Parah Aduma should be either three or four years old. But it has to be three or four years old, and two years old would not be good. That's the machlokas. Seemingly, that machlokas has nothing to do with us. Listen to the words of the Medrash. I'm going to read it in Hebrew. Rav Acha b'shem Rav Chanina Amar. Rav Acha, in the name of Rav Chanina, said B'sha' sh'ala Moshe l'amaram. When Moshe ascended to Shamayim in order to receive the Torah Shema kol Olam Hakadosh Baruch Hu shayyistay veoisik beparshas parah He heard Hakadosh Baruch Hu was dealing with the laws of the Parah Aduma, the Parshas Parah Aduma.

3:34 The Omer Halacha B'Shem Omer And Hashem was quoting the Mishnah And he says the name of the Mishnah with the name of the person from the Mishnah. Listen what it says, Reuveni Yezir Omer Eglah B'Shnasa U'Parah B'Stayim. An Eglah Arufa has to be one year old, but a Parah Aduma needs to be two years old. And Moshe Rabenu has a wild response to this. He hears the Shita of Reuveni Yezir. He hears this Mishnah and listen what Moshe Rabenu says. Moshe says to Hashem, Reba N'Ha Ulamim, Master of the Universe. Yiratzon shehe mechalatzai. Please may it be your will that this Eliezer comes from me. That he is one of my descendants. It was so important to Moshe Rabbeinu that the Parah Aduma be two years old. He said, please let him be one of mine. Please let him be one of my descendants. Amar Lo, Hashem says back to Moshe Rabbeinu.

4:45 By your life, I promise you, he will be one of your offspring. This Eliezer, this Rav Eliezer from the Mishnah, he will be one of your offspring. And that's what it says in the pasuk. The shame ha echad Eliezer, shame also hamiyuchad. Why does it say in our pasuk that shame ha echad Eliezer? It should have said the shame hasheni. Because it says there is a unique one. B'she'ema echlo. There's a unique one, and who will that unique one day be? It will be Rav Eliezer from the Mishnah. This is the medrash, a strange medrash. We have so many questions on this medrash. First of all, what in the world is Moshe Rabbeinu so inspired by? He hears the sheet of Rav Eliezer that Aparaduma is only two years old. He says this must be one of my progeny. I can't bear to have this be from somebody else in Klal Yisrael. It must be my progeny. That's number one.

5:49 And number two This Eliezer in the pasuk is a reference to the Reb Eliezer that will one day be from the Mishnah. What's the connection between this Eliezer and that Eliezer? This Eliezer is the son of Moshe Rabbeinu. Why is there a reference to Reb Eliezer from the Mishnah? Which won't be for thousands of years. Why do we have a connection between that and Eliezer the son of Moshe Rabenu? Everyone has the two questions. That's the first thing we're dealing with tonight. In order to begin to answer this question, we're going to have to ask a couple of more. There's a medrash called Mechilta de Rabbi Yishmael. Listen to what the Mechilta says. I'm going to read it again in Hebrew. It came time for Moshe Rabenu to propose to Tzipora. A boy should not ask to marry a girl before he has spoken to the father. It's not midos tovos.

7:01 So what does Moshe Rabenu do? He goes to Israel and he says to Israel, "I would like to marry your daughter." Listen to the conversation. I did not have this conversation with Binyamin, my new son-in-law. Also, he never came to me. Amar lo yester. He knew I was into it. He knew you're a lot into it. He knew I was okay with it. I like that boy. Really? You girls are better than that. Amr lo Yisro. So Yisro said back to him Kibal alecha daver ze shomer locha Va'ani nosnalocha le'isha. Fulfill this condition that I have I will give you my daughter as a wife. Amr lo Mahu Moshe Rabbeinu says to Yisro, "What's the condition? I got to know." Amr lo. Ben she yilech atchila yilev avodah zarah. Your oldest son, your firstborn son, will be for idolatry. Mikan veeloch l'shem Shamayim. All the other kids can serve Hashem, but the first one has to worship idols.

8:23 Strange. What would you expect that Moshe Rabbeinu would say? I would have expected Moshe Rabbeinu to say, "Sorry, no go. Not going to give up one of my children to avodah zarah." The kibbeh I love, and Moshe Rabenu took the deal. But Yisro, smart father-in-law He didn't know if he trusted Moshe Rabenu. So he says, "Amrlo, Yishevli, swear it to me." Now, what would we have expected Moshe Rabenu to do at this point? It's one thing for Moshe Rabenu to say he'll do it. Maybe he had some sort of sneaky Jewish way of, 'Yeah, I said it, but I really meant something else.' Some sort of halachic lundus to get out of it. But Yishevli, and Moshe swears it. Shenemar vayoel Moshe. This is what it means. Vayoel Moshe means Moshe consented. That's what it means when it says in the pasuk. Vayoel Moshe means Moshe consented. There's an oath.

9:14 Ein ele elalosh and shvua. Vayoel means a type of oath. So Moshe Rabbeinu swore that his oldest son Gershom would be for Avodah Zarah. Lefikach hiktim haMalach laharogas Moshe. Since Gershom was given over to Avodah Zara, he didn't have what? He didn't have a bris. A bris is for Jews. Gershom was given over to Avodah Zara. And what happened? The Malach Amavus. We all know the story. The Malach came to kill Moshe Rabbeinu. Why? Because he said you didn't give your son a bris milah. We all know the story that Sipora, that heroic woman, she immediately took a sharp stone and she gave Gereshim a bris mila, and this saved Moshe Rabenu from certain death. So we have again two questions on this amazing pleyadeka mechalta of Rabbi Yisrael. Question number one: How in the world could Moshe Rabenu agree? To give his child over to Avodah Zara, the halacha is if somebody puts a gun to your head and says worship Avodah Zara, the halacha is you die.

10:28 Here, Moshe Rabbeinu didn't have a gun to his head; it was a shiduch. Have to marry her. There are other girls in Midian. Moshe Rabbeinu takes a shvua that he's going to give over Gereshim to Avodah Zara. What in the world does that mean? How could it be? It doesn't make any sense. Not only is it against Yiddishkeit. But even the Sheva Mitzvos bnei Noach say that you're not allowed to worship Avot Hazara. So how could Moshe Rabbeinu have said yes to this? That's our first question. And there's another question, and this is a very important one: How did Moshe Rabbeinu meet Zipporah? The well. At the well. What happened at the well that he met her? She was being attacked, right? She was being attacked by the well. If you look at Chazal, why was she being attacked? Because Yisro was Kohain Midyan. He was a priest in Midyan.

11:17 And Yisro already decided that he was abandoning the pagan practices of Midyan And therefore they were harassing his daughters because they knew they could get away with it because he was no longer the great Almighty Yisro because he was no longer the guy who believed in all this pagan idolatry. And they were going to depending on the lashon of the depending on which side of the medrash. Either they were going to kill Zipporah or they were going to violate Zipporah And Moshe Rabenu saved the daughters of Yisro. But wait a second. That means that at this point in the story, Yisro had already given up avodah zarah. If Yisro had already given up avodah zarah, why does Yisro tell Moshe Rabenu, 'I'll let you marry my oldest daughter, but your first son needs to be avodah zarah'? I thought Yisro doesn't care about this stuff anymore.

12:06 You hear the question? So we have to review. We have four questions so far. I know it's a lot to handle, and I know we're in the cheder ocha, not the beis medrash, but still, we're doing okay. We're doing our best. Questions number one and two: Why was Moshe Rabbeinu inspired by Rabbi Eliezer's position about the Parah Aduma? The question number one. Question number two: What's the connection between Eliezer and ultimately Rabbi Eliezer in the Mishnah? Question number three: How could Moshe agree to give over his oldest child to Avodah Zarah? You have to die for something like that. And question number four: Yisro had already given up avodah zarah. Why would Yisro want Gershom to be a baal avodah zarah? Let's take another turn. Let's go to Tanach or Nach. There's a story called Pesal Micha. The story is nice to teach in seminary when I give this shir to the boys. They have no idea what I'm talking about because they've never learned Tanach.

13:01 Do you girls know the story of Pesel Micha? I'll repeat it in case you don't know, but just give me the nods for those of you who do know. Not bad. About forty percent of you. I'm sure the rest of you were diligent high school students. So there was a man whose name was Micha And he decided to make this amazing avodah zara in his house Beautiful silver avodah zara And he hired a man. From Shevet Levi To be the priest of this avodah zara, and people would come from far and wide to worship this avodah zara, and this priest, this Levite, this Levi, he would teach them what to do. At the same time, there was a group from Shevet Don. And they came to the area where Micha lived, and they came to worship this avodah zara because they were looking for a plot of land.

13:58 And they came to the house where Micha lived, and they met this Levi and listened to the words of the pasuk. Hema im beis Micha, when they were by the house of Micha V'hema hikiru eskal hanar haLevi. They recognized the voice of this Levite. Very strange. Torah doesn't tell us yet who this Levi is, but these people from Dan heard him speak and said. We know that voice. That voice sounds familiar. You ever have that where somebody's speaking on the phone, you go, I know that voice. Here, they're staring at this Levi, and they go, I know you from somewhere. I know your voice. Where do I know you from? VeYasurusham, and they said to him I'm sorry, VeYasurusham, and they turned to the side and they said to him, VeYomerlo Mi Haviyacha? Who brought you here? Mi Haviyacha Alom? Who brought you here? Uma Ata Ose Bazen? What are you doing with this? Umalicha Po? And why are you here? Seems to be three questions that seem to be redundant. All three basically say the same thing. What do they say? What are you doing here?

15:05 Levi tells them the whole story of how he got there, and they ask him, 'Do you think we should settle the land around here?' And he says, 'Yes.' So they go and they settle the land, and then they steal the Avodah Zarah from Misha's house, and then they bring this light, this Levi, to the house, and they say, 'Now you're going to be the priest.' Of Pesal Micha here in our house. Who is this Levi? Who is this Levi? That'd be a good call. It's not. VeYakumulahem b'nei Dan as a pesel. The children of Dan set up this pesel. They set up this idolatry. And listen, the Torah is now going to tell us all the way at the end of the story. We're going to hear who this Levi is. The Ahonah son Ben Gershom Ben Benashahu Ubanav. Yehona's son, who was the son of Gershom, and who's the son of Gershom?

15:58 Who's Gershom's father? Menashe. Except that's not what it says. That's not what it says. Listen to the words of the pasuk. You got to have. There's a lot of details here. Beautiful details. The Yehona's son, Ben Gershom, Ben Menashe. That's strange. Menashe is not his name. Moshe is his name. The Torah says Menashe. Yehonasan, the son of Gershom, the son of Menashe, he and his children became the priests of Pesel Misha in Shevet Dan. If you look inside Nach There's an anomaly here. The word Menashe, the nun, is what's called a nun tloya. A hanging nun. A hanging Chad. We have no marker here. It looks like this. Thank you so much. It looks in the Torah. It looks like this: you have a mem And then you have a small nun. And then you have a shin, and then you have a hay. So the nun is there. It says Menashe But clearly this nun is out of place because actually we know who Gershom's father is. Who's Gershom's father? Moshe. So obviously it's a reference to Moshe. But still, somehow we're hiding the fact that it's Moshe Rabenu. The Gemara deals with this. Listen to what the Gemara says. I'm going to read again the Gemara inside. It's a Gemara in Baba Basra.

17:23 The Gemara says, "Vehi ben Menashehu" Yehona son ben Gershom ben Menashe. This is the son of Menashe. Vehalo ben Moshehu. We know who Gershom's father was. Gershom's father is Moshe. The Chizib b'nei b'nei Moshe Gershom veEliyzer. The pasuk in Devarim tells us that who are the children of Gershom? Who are the children of Moshe? Gershom and Eliyzer. Elohim itochshe. Also Meisa Menashe tlo uAkasuv b'Menashe. Since he's acting in the way that Menashe wants him to act Since Yehona's son is Ben Gershom, but Yehona's son is acting like who? Like Moshe or like Menashe? He's acting like Menashe because remember he's acting inappropriately. So the Torah hides the fact that he's Moshe Abenu's grandson. He says Moshe Abenu's grandson, Moshe Abenu's grandson is that Levi that has this terrible idol in the house of Misha that's in Shevet Don. How did Moshe Abenu's grandson end up over here? Listen to the continuation of the Gemara.

18:31 Amar lo. Lav mi Moshe Kassis. This is a hidden dialogue. You only find it in the Gemara. You don't find it in the Pesukim. There's a hidden dialogue that takes place between the members of Shevet Dan and Yehonasan ben Gershon ben Moshe. Listen what they said. They said, "Aren't you a descendant of Moshe Rabbeinu?" Dersiv be al tikrav halom. Don't draw close to here, girls. Where was Moshe Rabbeinu told not to draw close to here? By the way, the snare by the burning bush, and look if you go back to the pesukim, what does it say? It says "Mi haviyacha halom." You see how the halom is the same exact word. So there was a secret dialogue when they said to him, 'Mi haviyacha halom?' 'Yahu brought you here.' What did they really mean? You're the child of Moshe Rabbeinu. About who? Hakadosh Baruch Hu used that same word of halom. How did you end up here? Remember we said that there was all that redundancy. And then it continues.

19:31 It says "Lav mi Moshe ka'asus d'chsev be mazebi adecha." What is this in your hand? Remember, what did Moshe Rabbeinu have in his hand? He had a staff that turned into a snake. Go back to the pasuk. What's the next question? "Uma ata osa baze." See how the words "mazeb" and "meta osa baze" are exactly the same. In other words, what's the question that Bnei Don are asking? This Yehonasan ben Gersham ben Moshe, they're saying, how did you, the child, the grandchild of Moshe Rabbeinu, the child of Gersham, end up in this terrible state of avodah zarah? I told you this was a chinuch shear. You want to know the question? How do we end up with an idolatrous grandchild? This is the question they were asking. None of us want idolatrous grandchildren. And then he says the strangest thing: Amar lahen. Yehona's son tells them something relevant to every one of us. I promise you.

20:28 Kach mikublani mi'beis avi avo. I have a tradition from my father and from my grandfather. He's answering the question: How did I become a priest for Pesal Micha? I have a tradition from my father and my grandfather. La olam yascher adam la atzmo la avodah zarah va'al yetsdarich labrios. You girls know what that means. He says, "I had a tradition from Moshe Rabenu." This Yehonasan speaking. I had a tradition from Moshe Rabenu. It's better for somebody to hire themselves out to do idol worship than it is to take tzedakah from others. What? This is what the Gemara says. Yehonasan ben Gersham ben Moshe Rabenu said, "I have a tradition." This doesn't make any sense to us. I have a tradition from my father, from my grandfather. It's better. Stay with me. It's better, thank you. It's better to worship Avodah Zarah to be a priest for Avodah Zarah than it is to take tzedakah.

21:31 And the Gemara pushes back. The Gemara says, "Vehu savr la Avodah Zarah mamish." Yehoshua got it wrong. He messed up the tradition. He thought it meant that it's better to do Avodah Zarah than take tzedakah. But of course, that's not what Moshe Rabbeinu means. Because Moshe Rabbeinu would never say that. Because idolatry is something that if somebody puts a gun to your head, what are you supposed to do? You're supposed to die rather than do avodah zara. Moshe Rabbeinu never would have said that. So what does the Gemara say? It doesn't mean la avodah zara mamish velo he. Ela avodah zara avodah shezara lo. He messed up the tradition. There's a difference between idol worship and strange work. What does strange work mean? Strange work means to do something that's beneath your dignity. I'll tell you a story. Just take a pause from the Gemara for a moment. When I was in yeshiva, Rishmulevitz was the menahel of the yeshiva.

22:21 And Rishmulevitz always used to tell the boys, "We were in Landers, so there was yeshiva in the morning and there was college in the afternoon, and then there was night seder." Rishmulevitz would always tell the boys, "Boys, you're getting a college education. God willing, you'll get good jobs." But my father told me If you have to chop wood Meaning a guy shouldn't be married. And have a wife, and have children, and say I lost my job. I'm not going to take another job that's beneath my dignity. I'm going to wait until I can get another accounting job. I'm going to wait until I can become a lawyer again. He said, 'If you have to chop wood, you have to chop wood. Do whatever you have to do in order to bring home a parnasa, even if you feel like it's beneath your dignity. It doesn't matter. You do what needs to be done.' And this was what the Gemara was actually telling us. He's saying, of course, it didn't mean avodah zara mamish that you should actually do avodah zara. It meant do avodah. What does avodah mean?

23:16 Work zara. That's strange. That's beneath your dignity. And the Gemara continues. The Amor layer rabler of Kahana, as rab setter of Kahana, notosh nevelasa beshuka veshakaligra. It's better to flay a carcass in the street and to make some money off that. Velotema gaver rabba ana. Vezila be milseh. You shouldn't say I'm a great man, and this work is degrading to me. So it's a wild, wild Gemara. How did Yehona's son Ben Gershom Ben Moshe Rabbeinu become a balavodazara? Because Moshe Rabbeinu told Gershom I want you to know something. Better to do strange work than to take tzedakah. Don't say you're too great for this work. And when Yehonasan heard it from Gerashom, what did he hear? Better to serve idols than to actually take tzedaka. And of course, he got it wrong. But that's how he became the Levi in the house of Micha, and ultimately by Shavit Don that made them worship idolatry.

24:19 And the Gemara continues and tells us the end of the story that David Hamelech saw that Yehonasan liked money, so he put him in charge of all of the treasuries. As it says in the pasuk in Devarim. Ushvuel ben Gershom ben Menashe naged al aotros. There was a man whose name was Shvuel, who was the son of Gershom, who was the son of Menashe, and he was in charge of all the king's treasuries. And the Gemara says, Vehi Shvuel shmo. We know Shvuel wasn't his name. What's Gershom's son's name? Yehonah's son. So why is he called Shvuel? So the Gemara says Amar of Yochanan, Sheshav l'kel bchal libo. Because ultimately Yehona's son did tshuva, and the Torah calls him Shavu'el because he did complete tshuva. We have two questions in front of us. Number one Where in the world do we ever find that Moshe Rabbeinu told Gershom it's better to do strange work? Do we ever see anything like that? It's not anywhere in the Torah. Where's the Gemara made this up? Obviously it didn't, but it sounds like the Gemara made it up. There was this statement from Moshe Rabbeinu we've never heard before. It's not anywhere in Medrash. That Moshe Rabbeinu comes along and he says, 'Better to do strange work than to take tzedakah.' Where do we ever see something like that? And also, how did Yehonasan mess that up?

25:41 Why would Moshe Rabbeinu say avodah zara? He could have used a better term. That now we put Yehonasan in a situation where he has to think, 'Oh, it doesn't mean avodah zara mamish. It means strange work.' What's going on over here? So the Ramami Pano tells us an amazing thing, and here's where it comes together, girls. You already heard in tonight's shir where Moshe Rabenu made this promise. Where did Moshe Rabenu make a promise to Yisro? When he wanted to marry Tzipora Yisro had a question for him. Listen to the question that Yisro had. He said Who will take care of my daughter? So Moshe Rabbeinu told Yisro I will tell my son Gershom. I will give him over to what? To Avodah Zarah. In other words, remember in the beginning of the Shir when I told you that they made a deal that Yisro said, 'I want the first one to be given over to Avodah Zarah.' Is that what that meant?

26:47 It didn't mean giving him over to Avodah Zarah. How do you know that it meant that it didn't mean giving him over to Avodah Zarah? Would Moshe Rabbeinu ever have agreed to give Gershom over to Avodah Zarah? Would Yisro have ever asked for Gershom to be given over to Avodah Zara? That's not what it meant. The Gemara here tells us what it meant. What did it mean? It meant make sure that my son, that your firstborn son, Gershom, he's willing to do anything to bring in a parnasa. The rest of them can sit and learn in Koyla. The rest of them can be Lashem Shamayim. But the first one has to know that he is willing to do anything to provide for the family. This is what Yisro said. Now Something else you have to know about Yisro. The pasuk says that after the war of Amalek and after Kriyas Yam Suf, Yisro came to Kallah Yisro.

27:46 Listen what it says: Ati adati kigadul Hashem yikol alokim. Now I know that God is greater than all the other gods in the world. For the whole thing that they plotted Rashi says, "What's the pshat in this medrash?" Girls, that's a different Rashi. Good thought though. But listen, what Rashi says. There's a feature about Yisro that you didn't know. Yisro worshipped every single god in the entire world. Did you know that? Yisro went around and he studied every single god in the entire world. And now he says, "Ati adati." Now I know that of all the gods that I've studied The greatest god is Hashem. He's the only true god. In other words, girls There's a machlokas between Yisro and Moshe Rabbeinu. How do we teach our kids about God? There are two ways of teaching your kids about God. Yisro comes and he says, "Here's what I want you to do."

28:53 I want you to give one of your sons to me. He's going to have my methodology. What's my methodology? My methodology is to try it all. Study it all, look into everything. Research Islam, research Christianity, research Hinduism, research Buddhist Buddhism. I want him to study everything. What's the advantage of studying everything? What does a person get when he studies everything? What you get is clarity. You get absolute knowledge. Sometimes when you study these things, girls, they're funny. It's funny. You hear these things and you think it's a ridiculous thing. If you actually think about what you're learning from some of these other religions, like there's thousands of gods and some of them have arms coming out of elephants. Really, you worship that? Still in 2023, that's what we're talking about here. You study these things, you see how silly they are. But there's an advantage because when you've gone ahead and you've studied all of those things, and now you study Yiddishkeit, you know what happens?

29:55 You have clarity. You go. This is true. It's like kaviyachol. Obviously, this is not the same, but almost the same. You know who the most spiritual people in the world are? Recovering alcoholics. They've been to Gehenna and back. They know clearly when a recovering alcoholic, somebody who's in his fifties, somebody who's been sober for twenty years When he sees a kid messing around with alcohol He has clarity on what's happening and he knows that is a tragic path. I've seen the destruction and devastation that comes with being an addict. It's horrific. It's absolutely horrific. And they know it. They don't know it academically. What do they know it? They know it experientially. And when an addict goes to that kid who's in his 20s and he says, "Listen to me" Put down the bottle. They're not doing it from a place I've studied the psychology of addiction.

31:04 They know it. They've lived it. They've been to Gehenna. They know where it takes you. They know the devastation. They know the destruction. The relationship that they have with God is personal because the only way that they were able to get out of their addiction was to give their will and their lives over to God. This is Yisro. Yisro says, "I studied it all. I did it all. I went to every avodah zara in the world. I want my gershom" My firstborn grandson. I want him to think like I do. I want his Judaism to be on fire. You know those bali tshuva in Yerushalayim? Did you go those bali tshuva in Yerushalayim yet, or anywhere in Eretz Yisrael? You ever go their house for Shabbos? You go to their house for Shabbos. You see these people. They don't just have a Shabbos table. Like we grew up, for the most part, some of us grew up in homes. Our father said the Torah, and we're like, okay, when's this thing going to be finished? I need it short. I need it sweet. I need it like something very nice, and move on. I don't want to sit at a Shabbos table and here's mirrors and sings mirrors. I just want to go hang out with my friends. For us, what's Shabbos? Is Shabbos on fire?

32:13 Shabbos not on fire. Then you go to the house of a bal tshuva, especially if they're a recent bal tshuva. And it's like when that husband is making kiddush because he just learned about kiddush, because he already had all the parties. He already went to University of Miami. He was already in the frat. I have a chavurah that went to University of Miami. He said, I've seen it all. I've seen every party. He went to the University of Miami because that's where the best surfing was. So he's like, he's seen it all. You know what it's like when he makes kiddush, like he's seen a different type of kiddush. If you understand what I'm saying, yeah. When he makes kiddush and he's in there and he's like, he learned. Okay, this is what it means to sanctify the day, and like he's actually thinking about every word. And his wife, who's also on fire about her Judaism, and some Rebbe told her that she should really be focused on the bracha also while her husband is making the bracha.

33:02 So he's like this, and she's looking at him admiringly. Yes, we're serving Hashem together. It's so different than our homes. What happens in our homes? What does Habad look like? He and I are just so. You're flying through the thing. You go to the homes of these baalei teshuva, the people that have tried it out. They're on fire. Yisro said, "I want Gershom to have an ata yadati experience. I want him to be on fire about his Judaism, like I'm on fire about Judaism. I left everything behind. I came to join you in the desert. Why? Because I'm compelled to. Because I can't imagine life without Yiddishkeit. Because I finally arrived at the truth." Moshe Rabbeinu says back to him. I'll give you Gershom. But I don't agree with this path. Because, and listen very carefully now Because you don't need to be an alcoholic in order to be sober.

33:59 There's such a thing as some people who just go I don't need to hit rock bottom in order to build a house. I could just build a house. I don't need to destroy my family in order to realize the devastation of alcoholism. I don't need to do that. I could just say that's not a good thing to do. Why would I want my children to go to Gehenna so that they could learn how to leave Gehenna? It's like the boys in yeshiva always say to me. They say Rebbe. But isn't it true that because you grew up like us, that's why you're a Rebbe? Maybe if you grew up and were more Orthodox, more observant growing up, maybe you wouldn't be a Rebbe. I said maybe, but you don't have to be a bal tshuva in order to become a Rebbe. Girls, I'm gonna tell you a secret. I know everybody here is obsessed with Rav Daniel Kalish.

34:49 I knew Rav Kalish in high school. He was a oh my gosh That was so whoa. Yes He was a human being before he was immortalized. And I'll tell you honestly He was an awesome guy. He was a great basketball player. Was like five or six years older than me, so I was like this little eighth grade kid learning in the base maggid at night, and there was that guy They called him Danny K back then, and he was the guy sitting and learning Yomim VeLaila. And yes, you could become a Rav Daniel Kalish without having to go to Gehenna. He was a really big budding Tamochachem, and he looked at the world and he had clarity. You don't need to destroy everything in order to learn the value of keeping the world upright. So Moshe Rabbeinu and Yisro, they had two fundamentally different paths. Now we're going to answer our first question.

35:46 Remember all the way back in the very beginning of the year, feels like two hours ago You girls were the ones that complained to Rabbi Fix. You said you want no longer to shear. Now you got one. You're like, which one? I didn't complain. But the ones of you that complained, you know who you are. V'shem ha echad. Gershom. What does it say? V'shem hasheni or v'shem ha echad, Eliezer? Says v'sheima echad. Why? Because there were two firstborns. One was Gershom, and that was Yisro's path. And then there was another one. He was also a firstborn, but whose path was he? Eliyazzer's. He was Moshe's path, and that was Eliyazzer. Now let's go back. Moshe Rabenu is all tomorrow. Moshe Rabenu goes up to Shamayim. And he sees Hakadosh Baruch Hu teaching over the Mishnah. And in the Mishnah, Rebbe Liazor comes and he says, 'Para Aduma.'

36:39 Only two years old. The Chachamim say three or four. Moshe Rabbeinu says that one's got to be mine. That's got to be my progeny. How did he know? What's he talking about here, girls? Is there a rationale? Is there a reason for the Para Aduma? The Para Aduma is called a chok. A chok means that it's beyond rational. It's not scientific. It's beyond rational. But the truth of the matter is, there is a reason. Do you know the Rashi brings a reason for Parah Aduma? The Parah Aduma comes because of the Chetah Egel. The Chetah Egel was, of course, what? What happened by Arsinai? They brought a golden calf. So why do we have to bring a cow, not a calf, a cow for the Parah Aduma? What does Rashi say? Let the mother come and clean up the mess of the child. Girls, a cow only begins giving birth at three years old.

37:28 Rationally, from a rational perspective, how old should a parah aduma be? Three or four years old. Whose shita is that? That's the chachamim. It's the logical shita. It's rational. Let's test out every religion. This one makes sense. But does Moshe Rabbeinu say that Yiddishkeit has to make sense, or is it possible? Girls, listen carefully now. Is it possible that our Yiddishkeit? Is it possible that our Yiddishkeit? If we believe that it's only rational in a certain way, isn't that arrogant? To think that our small minds can comprehend everything that God says Don't we know that it's true? Not because we went to an Eishat Torah discovery seminar; those things are very nice. But don't we know that it's true because you could feel it in your soul? Isn't that also true? It's deeply true that when you hear these things, it's beautiful. Rabbi Lawrence Kellerman wrote a book called 'Permission to Believe.' Why didn't he write 'Proof of God'? Because he said there are no absolute proofs, but this gives you permission to believe. Because the Jewish soul already believes, anachnum aminim b'nei aminim, even if it makes no sense.

38:38 Because it doesn't have to make sense. It doesn't have to fit into our puny minds. Our puny minds have to try to fit into it. So Moshe Rabbeinu heard the sheet of Rabbi Eliezer. Rabbi Eliezer says that Paragduma could be two years old. Wait a second! I just got done telling you Rashi. Rashi says that a Paragduma needs to be a mother. If it's going to be a mother, how old should it be? Three. Rabbi Eliezer says, "Yeah, but that's only if you believe that it's rational." The Torah is not just rational. The Torah is also greater than rational. Even a two-year-old paraduma could be for what's called paraduma even if it's only two years old. Moshe Rabbeinu gets excited. That's my shita in chinuch. It's not limited to logic, Yisro. You don't need to test every single thing according to your rational mind because it can't always be tested rationally because Judaism is greater than rationality.

39:27 So he says that's Eliezer. That's got to be an Eliezer. That's got to be from my Eliezer. My Eliezer was trained that way. Gerushim was trained one way. Eliezer was trained another. Now we understand the Gemara and Baba Basra. For Moshe Rabbeinu He says the path of Yisro is Avodah Zara. It's a strange path. It's a strange path, and you know what happens when you set your child on a strange path? Chas v'shalom. Your child could end up very confused. If a kid goes out there, we're not afraid of questions. But if a kid goes out there and studies Buddhism and studies Christianity and studies Islam and studies Hinduism, you know what could happen? They could get very confused because you think a 16-year-old is capable of studying these things? No. As a very clever rebbe Many years ago, the story goes back around 26 years ago.

40:21 There was a very intellectual high school boy. And he was interviewing for his yeshiva in Israel. And the rebbe who was interviewing him said to him Why do you want to come to Israel? So the guy said, "I'm on a quest for truth." I want to study every religion in the world. But I was born into Judaism, so I may as well study it first. So that's why I want to come to Israel. He came to Eretz Israel and now he lives in Eretz Israel, and he never finished his degree in studying all the other religions of the world. He's a neighbor of mine and a friend of mine. Wait, so how does that relate to me? There's a certain idea that if you're going to study all these things, if you're going to try to keep everything rational, you could get very confused. The path of Yisro from Moshe Rabbeinu is Avodah Zarah. It's a strange path.

41:12 But sometimes this is how a person has to support themselves. Sometimes we need to take the off-the-beaten path. There are kids that need to do this. There are kids that need to experiment and go through it. Some kids, no matter how much you tell them this is a bad idea, say to you, "You only know it's a bad idea because you tried it. Now leave me alone while I try it." That's you. Okay. And the parents are sitting there pulling their hair out because they're like, "I made this mistake. Don't make the same mistake." I just interviewed a boy last week. And he seems to be very passionate about his Judaism. I asked him where he got it from, and he said, "My." He's very diligent.

41:51 And I asked him where he got it from, and he said, 'My father went to this yeshiva in Eretz Yisrael. He was like the type of kid that did no work in high school, and then he went to yeshiva in Eretz Yisrael and he turned it around. And he's told me my whole life, "Don't make the same mistakes as I did." So I didn't.' And I was shocked. 'That's not the way that goes, right? It's supposed to be like my father told me my whole life. Don't make the same mistakes as I did. So I made exactly those mistakes, right? But this kid was the. I finally met a kid who actually listened to his parents. He's this really diligent kid. He has amazing grades. I'm excited for him to come to yeshiva. I hope he comes to mivavshari next year. He's a great guy. Most kids They go like this. They're like, "Yeah, but I gotta follow my path. Sometimes that's what we need to support ourselves." If we were smart We wouldn't do that. We would say, you don't have to go down into the abyss to discover your way out.

42:45 And Moshe's fear came true And his grandson Yehoshua Because he followed the path of Gershon. Ultimately ended up worshiping Pesel Micha. But there's a good end to the story because what happened? He fell down into the depths, and he became this person who was facilitating idolatry. But then, in the end, who does Yehonasan become? He becomes Shavuot. And why? Listen, what the Torah tells us: David Hamelach looks at him and he says You're not really a Balav Odesar; you just want money. You're not really a Balav Odesar; you just want money. I can give you money. He made him the head of his coffers. He made him the head of his treasuries. And that's when he did tshuva. Girls, I have a secret to tell you. A lot of these kids that are going around experimenting and they're saying, "I need to do this. I need to learn these things." That's not really what's happening. There's always an issue behind the issue.

43:43 And our job as rebbeim, as teachers, and as parents, is to look at the real issue. It's like imagine if you have a girl And let's say she starts dressing in an inappropriate way. So you could do one of two things: you could start yelling at her to be diff And you could put signs up all over the place. You can create a mitzah and you can make an incentive program. But probably, maybe it'll work, but probably not. Because if you open your hearts and open your ears and open your mind, then you listen to this girl. You know what she'll tell you? There was this really close friend that I've had for years, and out of nowhere, she stopped talking to me. I'm feeling really alone. I'm feeling really alienated from my chavra. I'm feeling really pushed away. And so, if you're gonna push me away, I may as well be away.

44:41 That girl is not struggling with sneis. She's struggling with being alone. And every teacher that goes over her and says, "New, a little bit longer. New, another button." All they're doing is pushing that girl away just a little bit more, making her feel just a little bit more alone. There's a beautiful story with Rosh Hashanah. Freifeld, the Chassidic levrach, who was the founding Rosh Yeshiva of Shaiyoshev. There was a boy who came to yeshiva. And Rosh Freifeld realized that he didn't have money, and the boy really needed money. Psychologically, he needed money. So he used to come to the bais medrash for shacharis, and then he would learn a couple of mishnayos and then he would go work. And one of the big gverim of Shiyashiv, one of the wealthy donors of Shiyashiv, came to the beis medrash, and the beis medrash wasn't that full. And he said to Rofrivel, "Why am I giving all this money for the beis medrash to be empty?"

45:28 So Rofrivel said, "You see that chair over there? You think it's empty? Let me tell you who's in that chair." In that chair is this boy. And he came to yeshivah and he was depressed and he was miserable because he didn't have any money in his pockets and he felt like he was poor. And it was such a bad feeling for him. So he comes in the morning and he daven's and he learns a couple of mishnayos and then he goes out to work and then he comes back at night for mincha and mirev and he learns a little bit more and now he's walking around with a smile on his face. Who says his chair is empty? That's chinuch. Who says his chair is empty? When Yehonasan was idolatrous. Because he grew up with a certain influence from his father, a certain influence that came from the house of Yisro, and he had fallen off the beaten path. It took a mechanech like David Hamelach to look at Yehonasan and say, "He's not a bad kid. He just needs some money. Put him in the right position, you'll see. He'll come back. He'll be shavuol."

46:21 And you know how he knew that? Because there's a rashbam. The Rishbam tells us how Yehona son behaved when people would come to him and they would say, 'How could we worship Pesel Micha? How could we worship this unbelievable Avodah Zara?' Listen to what the Rishbam says. Somebody would come to Yehona son with an ox or a sheep or a goat, and they would bring it for the idol, and they would say, 'Please, bring a kapara for us. Help us worship this Avodah Zara.' And Yehonasan would say, "How can an avodah zara help you? It doesn't eat, and it doesn't drink, and it doesn't bring anybody help, and it doesn't cause anybody harm." And the man would say, 'So what should I do?' And Yehonasan would say "Bring me flour and ten eggs, and that'll work." And then you know what Yehonasan would do? The guy would leave. And he would bake bread for himself and eat the food.

47:11 The Gemara continues. The Rishbam continues. A person once came to him and said to him. Please help me with this avodah zarah. And the Rishpam said, and Yehonasan said back to him, "I can't help you. It's an idol. An idol can't do anything." So the man said to him, 'If the idol is so foolish, if it's so futile' So then why are you serving it? Yehonasan answered. Es mi parnasa. So David Melech saw deeper. He didn't just see a kid who was doing the wrong thing. He saw a guy who needed some money. He put some cash in his pocket and then returned him to our Kadosh Baruch Hu. Yeah, That's what the response says. Girls We can choose to raise our children rationally. Sometimes our kids need that Or we can choose to raise our children in a way that's transcendent. We can choose to raise our children in a way that's beyond rational.

48:13 We can tell them to pay attention to the soul. You can do that. You can give that over to your kids. Your kids can see your enthusiasm and excitement. They could see the path of Moshe Rabbeinu. We're not afraid of questions, but Moshe Rabbeinu says don't limit Yiddishkeit to the rational. If you limit Yiddishkeit to the rational, you're asking for problems. It's okay to teach the rational, but don't limit it to that. Your kids don't need to experience everything. They don't need to be discoverers of everything in order to understand that some things are inappropriate, that some things are no good. We live in a day and age where kids are saying more and more, and they're right. They're saying, "I want to know why I'm doing the things that I'm doing." But I can assure you this, as somebody who's been doing this for many, many years now You can give every kid all the answers in the world.

49:05 But unless you get to the real issue, it won't matter. I've sat with guys in she'er and I've explained to them every single answer to every single question that they have. We've debated back and forth. I would say, Beli Guzma, it's been over a thousand hours. Every single day, I give a she'er in mivaseret. Two hours a day, I give this exact she'er, hashkafah she'er, answering every one of their questions. Two hours a day, five days a week, over the course of nine months of a year. Some of them do it for a second year. I can tell you this. Not saying it's not meaningful. It certainly is. But the best answer to all of these questions is to go deeper. Not limit Judaism to the rational. To go higher than the rational. It's okay to bring the rational, but it needs to be in the context of that which is greater than rational. The dimensions of the soul. And we need to teach our children in such a way that we see what's actually going on, not just treating the symptoms, but treating the actual problem.