This article first appeared on genaleph.org As we have already explained in previous articles, the Sugya of the Ben Sorer U’Moreh is rich with invaluable Chinuch lessons. Let us once again delve deeply into this Parsha in order to aid us on our journey to raising healthy and well-adjusted children.
וְאָֽמְר֞וּ אֶל־זִקְנֵ֣י עִיר֗וֹ בְּנֵ֤נוּ זֶה֙ סוֹרֵ֣ר וּמֹרֶ֔ה אֵינֶ֥נּוּ שֹׁמֵ֖עַ בְּקֹלֵ֑נוּ זוֹלֵ֖ל וְסֹבֵֽא
“This son of ours is wayward and rebellious; he does not heed our voice; [he is] a glutton a a guzzler.” (Devarim 21:20)
The Maharal explains that the word “kol” (voice) denotes a noise that is not understandable. In other words, the reason this child becomes a Ben Sorer U’Moreh is because his parents’ instructions do not make sense to him. Children, like adults, follow directives that are clear and logical. An instruction that is not intelligible is difficult to follow.
At Har Sina we said both Naaseh, we will do, and Nishma, we will listen. As parents it is our responsibility to impart to our children that Judaism is a religion of humility. We humble ourselves before Hashem and we follow His instructions before we understand why. It is the height of hubris to think that our limited minds have the capacity to understand an infinite God. Our children must first be taught that we submit ourselves to a Higher Power regardless of what we understand. To do anything otherwise is to raise a generation of narcissists. And yet, Nishma, understanding is also mission critical
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