This article first appeared on genaleph.org As we continue to reap the rewards of studying the Sugya of the Ben Sorer U’Moreh let us turn our attention to a fascinating halacha. The Ben Sorer U’Moreh can only be convicted if the parents do not forgive their child[1]. This is a very difficult halacha to understand. The Ben Sorer U’Moreh is executed not because of what he has done (gluttony and alcoholism do not warrant capital punishment) but because of what he will do. Chazal tell us that the Ben Sorer U’Moreh is destined to become a murderer. How then can we absolve the Ben Sorer U’Moreh simply because his parents have forgiven him? We are ostensibly allowing a murderer off death row! In order to explain this, we must first explore the nature of forgiveness. Let us imagine the following scenario: Avraham and Sarah are a married couple. Like many married couples they disagree from time to time. In the course of a particularly heated argument, Reuven says something deeply hurtful to Sarah. Later Reuven sincerely apologizes to Sarah for the way that he spoke with her in the heat of the moment. Sarah forgives him because she knows that this is not a true representation of Reuven. He is a better man than that. It was only because of the dynamic of that particular moment that he acted inappropriately. In other words, the gift of forgiveness is that we see the other person for who they truly are. We let them know that they are better than their lowest moments. Healthy homes are abl
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